Lanzarote based web designer Barbarella Buchner ‘married’ her cats Lugosi and Spider in January 2004. She has a “catified” loo seat, “attends cat support groups” and on coming across the marryyourpet.com website states she states “she screamed: ‘Have my money and send me a certificate of our marriage’ ”. Buchner adds: “I’m not alone, I have my cats now. I have no regrets and I don’t care what people say… If a man ever approaches me, I just tell them straight off: ‘Sorry, I’m married to my cats’ … Obviously I don’t have sex with my cats. It’s just pure, spiritual, unconditional love… It’s like gay or polyamorous marriage. As long as we’re happy, why should anybody criticise?” The fact that this tattooed, cannabis growing attention seeker has two Twitter accounts (one of which she describes as “official” despite it having just 100 followers) and has told this ridiculous story to The Mirror, the Metro, the Daily Mail and The Huffington Post amongst others about says it all.