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THE ROLL CALL

A list of influence

A ranked assembly of individuals of note along with details of their achievements and quirks.

OBSERVERS

PERSONALITIES

CREATIVES

BUSINESS

Tommy Banks – Born in 1989, rising star Michelin Star winning chef and Saturday Kitchen regular Tommy Banks’ co-owns The Black Swan at Oldstead, Oldestad, York, North Yorkshire, YO61 4BL.

1

Tommy Banks
Hetty Green (AKA Henrietta Green, ‘The Witch of Wall Street,’ née Henrietta Robinson, 1834 – 1916) – “The greatest miser” and “richest woman in America” during the Gilded Age, Hetty Green lived by the rule of “buy cheap and sell dear.”

2

Hetty Green (AKA Henrietta Green, ‘The Witch of Wall Street,’ née Henrietta Robinson, 1834 – 1916)
Gareth E. Rees (AKA ‘Car Park Man’) – Car park expert, author ‘Car Park Life’ – Garage punk band singer and author of the 224-page Car Park Life Gareth E. Rees can officially be classified “the expert on Britain’s car parks.”

3

Gareth E. Rees (AKA ‘Car Park Man’)
Annie Börjesson (1975 – 2005, AKA ‘The Girl on the Beach’) – Mystery surrounds both the life and death of Annie Börjesson. Her body was found washed up on Prestwick Beach on 4th December 2005.

4

Annie Börjesson (1975 – 2005, AKA ‘The Girl on the Beach’)
Robert Oxley (AKA Rob Oxley) – Press secretary to Boris Johnson – Deliveroo boy and former assistant to alleged groper Michael Fallon became Boris Johnson’s press secretary in June 2019. He is best known for swearing.

5

Robert Oxley (AKA Rob Oxley)
Pat Mountain (AKA ‘Pat The Prized Pillock’ and ‘Someone’s Nan’) – UKIP’s interim leader in December 2019, Pat Mountain is a Brighton based berk with no idea what a constituency is. She thinks Gerrard Batten “brave.”

6

Pat Mountain (AKA ‘Pat The Prized Pillock’ and ‘Someone’s Nan’)
Alison Roman – LA born cook and author of ‘Dining In’ and ‘Nothing Fancy’ – LA born cook Alison Roman is the author of ‘Dining In’ and ‘Nothing Fancy.’ She has a style that is “totally relaxed” and her one pot chicken is the best.

7

Alison Roman
Mrs Filthy Piece of Toerag – Angry pensioner constituent of Boris Johnson – This purple coated pensioner told Sky News’ Sophy Ridge that she considers Prime Minister Boris Johnson “a filthy piece of toerag” in Uxbridge on 6th October 2019.

8

Mrs Filthy Piece of Toerag
Mark McGowan (AKA The Artist Taxi Driver and Chunky Mark) – London based Mark McGowan is better known as ‘The Artist Taxi Driver.’ He shares his daily rants on YouTube about political parties and injustice.

9

Mark McGowan (AKA The Artist Taxi Driver and Chunky Mark)
Christine Gischler – German model and socialite – Model of the moment Christine Gischler has over 50,000 followers on Instagram and is also a rising star on the social scene.

10

Christine Gischler
Angela Millington (1981 – 2014) – Murdered homeless woman – The skeletal remains of murdered homeless woman Angela Millington were found on Foulness Island in Essex in 2014 complete with a gaffer tape mask. Nobody has been convicted of her murder.

11

Angela Millington (1981 – 2014)
The Cheery Street Sweeper – Knightsbridge’s cheeriest street sweeper is a joy to behold. He is quite the contrast to the Royal Borough of K&C’s incompetent, avaricious councillors.

12

The Cheery Street Sweeper
Aloof yet versatile actress Dame Dorothy Tutin DBE (1930 – 2001) – Versatile and brilliant actress – A resident of a Chelsea houseboat named ‘Undine’ from 1953, Dame Dorothy Tutin was “one of UK’s most versatile actresses.”

13

Dame Dorothy Tutin DBE (1930 – 2001)
Dr Bernard Ecclestone (AKA Bernie Ecclestone, ‘The Grinch’ and ‘Bungling Bernie’) – This common as muck, stingy, diminutive dwarf once suggested Hitler was “able to get things done” and outrageously suggested the leader of the Black Shirts’ son, Max Moseley, “would do a super job” as Prime Minister. Notoriously tight, a former garage mechanic and once forced to pay £10 million in connection with tax avoidance, Bernie Ecclestone has been subject to an expose by Tom Bower. He has only one real friend, a creepy fellow with halitosis, and an alleged billionaire who wouldn’t pay to help get his own mother-in-law retrieved after she was kidnapped. He claims to be bright enough to be a doctor, but stamps and trains couldn’t make this prat anything other than the village idiot.

14

Dr Bernard Ecclestone (AKA Bernie Ecclestone, ‘The Grinch’ and ‘Bungling Bernie’)
Katherine Knight – This “sweet, matronly looking Australian woman” killed her partner John Price, skinned him, boiled his head in a pot and served up his body parts to his children with baked potatoes and gravy in 2000.

15

Katherine Knight
Robin Leach (1941 – 2018) – “With champagne wishes and caviar dreams” was the famous signoff of London born Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous host Robin Leach.

16

Robin Leach (1941 – 2018)
Socialite who got away with murder Elvira Mullens Barney (1904 – 1936) – Elvira Mullens Barney’s lover Michael Stephen was shot dead in her Knightsbridge house in 1932. She was cleared but died of a drug overdose.

17

Elvira Mullens Barney (1904 – 1936)
‘Mr Black Lives Matter’ – Little is known about this Belgravia entertainer – A regular outside Peggy Porschen’s Parlour, 116 Ebury Street, Belgravia, London, SW1W 9QQ ‘Mr Black Lives Matter’ attempts to entertain those queuing for cakes.

18

‘Mr Black Lives Matter’
Kyra Kennedy – Wildchild and scion of the Kennedy dynasty – A bit of a wildchild, Kyra Kennedy is the daughter of Robert F. Kennedy Jr. She has been accused of cyberbullying and claims to be “somewhere between psychotic and iconic.”

19

Kyra Kennedy
Belgian-born lawyer turned liar Alexander van der Zwaan – “Playboy” turned lawyer Alexander van der Zwaan had it all but destroyed his reputation after being jailed for 30 days for lying to the FBI in April 2018 over Russia’s links to President Trump’s election campaign. Aside from receiving positive publicity in Tatler after marrying Eva Khan, daughter of a Ukrainian-Russian billionaire named German Khan, in a “lavish society ceremony” at Luton Hoo, Bedfordshire in June 2017, this “ostentatious” Belgian-born, Notting Hill based attorney might now realise that telling the truth is generally for the best.

20

Alexander van der Zwaan
Serial fringe candidate David Bishop (AKA ‘Lord Biro’ & ‘Bus-pass Elvis’) – Eccentric David Bishop goes by the name ‘Lord Biro’ when he stands in elections. He attended Jimmy Savile’s funeral dressed as Elvis.

21

David Bishop (AKA ‘Lord Biro’ and ‘Bus-pass Elvis’)
Business titan Denise Coates CBE (AKA ‘The Patron of the Potteries’) – The richest self-made woman in the UK paid herself £217 million in 2016 and is said to have a personal fortune of circa £3.17 billion. She founded Bet365.com, one of the world’s largest online gambling companies, in 2000.

22

Denise Coates
The Rt. Hon. Theresa Villiers MP (AKA ‘The Telegraph Crow’) – Crow-like Theresa Villiers likes TV studios, claiming expenses, three-word alliterative phrases and hard Brexit. What a delightful woman.

23

The Rt. Hon. Theresa Villiers MP (AKA ‘The Telegraph Crow’)
Community heroine Lotti Henley (born Princess Windisch-Graetz of Austria) – Nonagenarian Lotti Henley co-founded the Plan Zheroes charity in 2011 as part of her “vision of a world where no one will be living in food poverty.”

24

Lotti Henley (born Princess Windisch-Graetz of Austria)
Adam Marchment (AKA ‘Man on the Run’ and ‘The Marchment Man’) – Vile paedophile and rapist Adam Marchment thinks he deserves better food in jail. Let him eat porridge!

25

Adam Marchment (AKA ‘Man on the Run’ and ‘The Marchment Man’)
Anne Marie Waters – Bigot and failed UKIP leadership candidate – Anne Marie Waters is the “Donald Trump of the UK” (without the power) according to her fans but just a “piss poor Nazi bigot” according to others.

26

Anne Marie Waters
Benjamin Lipari – East London based menswear and travel blogger Benjamin Lipari was born in Italy, grew up in Australia and is described as a “digital comms guru.” He has 16,500 followers on Instagram.

27

Benjamin Lipari
Gabriel and Sarah A. Chrisman – Port Townsend, Washington State residents Gabriel and Sarah A. Chrisman live as if they are Victorians. They get a lot of abuse.

28

Gabriel and Sarah A. Chrisman
Paedophile Shawn Sullivan (AKA Shawn O'Suilleabhain and ‘The Putney Paedo’) – Convicted sex offender in Ireland, accused sex offender in America, protected in Britain

29

Shawn Sullivan (AKA Shawn O’Suilleabhain and ‘The Putney Paedo’)
Theresa Doyle (AKA ‘The Grim Eater’ and ‘The Phantom Mourner’) – Funeral crasher from Slough, Berkshire

30

Theresa Doyle (AKA ‘The Grim Eater’ and ‘The Phantom Mourner’)
Rising star actor Pico Alexander (born Alexander Jogalla) – New York born actor Pico Alexander is of Polish heritage and the son of a cinematographer and also appeared in War Machine with Brad Pitt.

31

Pico Alexander (born Alexander Jogalla)
Leanne Ratcliffe (AKA ‘Freelee the Banana Girl’) – A somewhat loopy YouTube ‘star’, Australian Leanne Ratcliffe moved from promoting veganism to “living sustainably” in February 2017.

32

Leanne Ratcliffe (AKA ‘Freelee the Banana Girl’)
Socialite and fashion designer Andrew Warren – Known primarily as the best friend of Donald Trump’s daughter, Tiffany, and for his Just Drew brand.

33

Andrew Warren
Designer and tastemaker Eileen Gray (1878 – 1976, née Eileen Smith) – A pioneer of both the Art Deco style and the functionalist Modernist movement, bisexual Irish aristocrat Eileen Gray was best known for designing the Bibendum chair and the E-1027 table.

34

Eileen Gray (1878 – 1976, née Eileen Smith)
Dr Bendor Grosvenor – Old Masters expert and television presenter – Harrow and Cambridge educated Dr Bendor Grosvenor is a presenter of the BBC’s ‘Fake or Fortune?’ He also co-wrote ‘Crap MPs’.

35

Dr Bendor Grosvenor
Reclusive “leisure entrepreneur” and racing obsessive Trevor Hemmings

36

Trevor Hemmings CVO
Jolly giant Labour politician and all round brainbox Sharon Hodgson MP

37

Sharon Hodgson MP
“Dapper Dan” of blogging Isaac Hindin-Miller

38

Isaac Hindin-Miller
Nazi supporting jailbird turned Milton Keynes Labour Party councillor Margaret Burke pictured with fellow hypocrite Diane Abbott MP

39

Margaret Burke
Robert Adam – Hampshire based architect and designer Robert Adam (born 1948) followed in the steps of his namesake and has become one of the most important figures in neo-classical style.

40

Robert Adam
Instagram self-publicists Hannah, Soleil and Winter Strafford-Taylor – Narcissist Hannah Strafford-Taylor describes herself as “Instagram’s most stylish mum”. She is mostly accompanied by her daughters Winter and Soleil.

41

Hannah, Soleil and Winter Strafford-Taylor
Badly dressed bigoted property tycoons Fergus and Judith Wilson – Fat former boxer Fergus Wilson and his badly dressed Hyacinth Bucket-like wife banned “coloured people” from renting from them in Kent

42

Fergus and Judith Wilson
Wacky, gay actor and Catweazle star Geoffrey Bayldon (1924 – 2017) – Leeds born actor Geoffrey Bayldon was best known for playing Catweazle in the 1970s series of same name. He turned down playing Dr Who twice

43

Geoffrey Bayldon (1924 – 2017)
Racist Tory councillor and director of Ambay Software Nick Harrington – Bigot Nick Harrington tweeted: “You can keep your f***ing gypsies” after Ireland gave Britain ‘nul points’ in Eurovision Song Contest.

44

Nick Harrington
True wildcard Lady Ridsdale DBE (1921 – 2009, née Victoire Bennett) – Dame Paddy Ridsdale was an intelligence operative, secretary to Ian Fleming and the inspiration for the Bond character Miss Moneypenny.

45

Lady Ridsdale DBE (1921 – 2009, née Victoire Bennett)
Bob Marshall-Andrews QC – Barrister, former Labour MP and novelist

46

Bob Marshall-Andrews QC
Carina Reid – Chelsea, SW3 based fraudster and trollop

47

Carina Reid
Brenda from Bristol – The voice of the nation, 2017’s Gillian Duffy – Pearl clad ‘Brenda from Bristol’ became the Gillian Duffy of 2017 General Election when she shared her views about politics with a reporter.

48

Brenda from Bristol
Mashable founder Pete Cashmore (AKA ‘The Sage of Media’)

49

Pete Cashmore (AKA ‘The Sage of Media’)
Dopey drugs mule Michaella McCollum – A shameless wench – Dopey drugs mule Michaella McCollum was one half of the ‘Peru Two’ jailed in 2013 for attempting to smuggle £1.5 million of cocaine.

50

Michaella McCollum
Jack Schlossberg (AKA John Bouvier Kennedy Schlossberg) – New York born, Yale educated Jack Schlossberg is the only grandson of President John F. Kennedy. He aspires to a career in politics.

51

Jack Schlossberg (AKA John Bouvier Kennedy Schlossberg)
Miriam Margolyes OBE – Actress and humanitarian advocate

52

Miriam Margolyes OBE
Michael Heaver – Right-wing co-owner of Westmonster website

53

Michael Heaver
Tory turncoat politician The Rt. Hon. The Lord Davies of Stamford (AKA Quentin Davies) – Self-serving Quentin Davies was rewarded with a peerage after defecting to Labour. He is a true example of a turncoat. Baaa!

54

The Rt. Hon. The Lord Davies of Stamford (AKA Quentin Davies)
The Horror in the Hummer

55

The Horror in the Hummer

56

The Cross Word Couple (AKA ‘The Crossword Couple’)
Carol Bowditch – Pensioner spared jailed despite having sex with dogs

57

Carol Bowditch
Martina Big – The name of this “mahogany skinned” German is a giveaway.

58

Martina Big
Alfie Best II – Romany Gypsy turned multi-millionaire businessman

59

Alfie Best II
Interior designer and philanthropist Charlot Malin (1969 – 2017) –Oslo born, San Francisco based interior designer and philanthropist Charlot D. Malin worked with George Lucas and Robert Redford. She loathed microwaves.

60

Charlot Malin (1969 – 2017)
2006 Securitas depot robber Lee Brahim Murray-Lamrani (AKA ‘Lightning Lee’ and ‘The Stopwatch’) – Cage fighter and mastermind of Britain’s biggest cash robbery

61

Lee Brahim Murray-Lamrani (AKA ‘Lightning Lee’ and ‘The Stopwatch’)
Jan Harvey – Actress and star of Howards’ Way

62

Jan Harvey
Stephen Miller – Senior Policy Advisor to the President – Donald Trump

63

Stephen Miller
Betsy DeVos (née Elisabeth Prince)

64

Betsy DeVos (née Elisabeth Prince)
Brian Shaffer (AKA “The Man Who Vanished Into Thin Air)

65

Brian Shaffer (AKA “The Man Who Vanished Into Thin Air)
Gianna Lahainer (AKA ‘The Merry Widow’, also known as Gina Lombardi)

66

Gianna Lahainer
Anders Holch Povlsen (AKA “The New King of Scotland”)

67

Anders Holch Povlsen (AKA “The New King of Scotland”)

68

Chen Si (陳思)
Baba Vanga (баба Ванга, AKA ‘Nostradamus from the Balkans’, 1911 – 1996) – Blind, illiterate, psychic Macedonian villager and clairvoyant

69

Baba Vanga (баба Ванга, AKA ‘Nostradamus from the Balkans’, 1911 – 1996)
Nick Bell – Entreprenuer and Snapchat vice president of content

70

Nick Bell
Music promoter Mervyn Conn (AKA ‘Mr Music Man’) – Arrogant rapist and sex offender

71

Mervyn Conn (AKA ‘Mr Music Man’)
The Pret Prayer – Pret A Manger, 15 Old Brompton Road, South Kensington, London, SW7 3HZ

72

The Pret Prayer
Jeffrey Slonim –Entertainment reporter and walking ad for Ralph Lauren

73

Jeffrey Slonim (1960 – 2016)
The Pret Sleeper – Pret A Manger, 15 Old Brompton Road, South Kensington, London, SW7 3HZ

74

The Pret Sleeper
Jean Alexander (born Jean Alexander Hodgkinson, 1926 – 2016)

75

Jean Alexander (born Jean Alexander Hodgkinson, 1926 – 2016)
Douglas Durst – New Yorker real estate royalty and brother of suspected killer Robert Durst

76

Douglas Durst
Livia Firth (born and also known as Livia Giuggioli)

77

Livia Firth (born and also known as Livia Giuggioli)
Mr Make a Big Issue

78

Mr Make a Big Issue
Gourmet popcorn entrepreneur Cassandra Stavrou

79

Cassandra Stavrou
Prince John Zylinski (AKA ‘Prince Twinkle Toes’)

80

Prince John Zylinski
Victoria Wood CBE (1953 – 2016)

81

Victoria Wood CBE (1953 – 2016)
The Pret Spitter

82

The Pret Spitter
Mary Millington (marital name Mary Maxted, born Mary Quilter, 1945 – 1979)

83

Mary Millington (marital name Mary Maxted, born Mary Quilter, 1945 – 1979)
Art curator Lawrence Van Hagen

84

Lawrence Van Hagen
British actress and singer Patricia Routledge CBE (born Katherine Patricia Routledge)

85

Patricia Routledge CBE (born Katherine Patricia Routledge)
Turki Bin Abdullah (AKA “The Pint-Sized James Stunt”)

86

Turki Bin Abdullah (AKA “The Pint-Sized James Stunt”)
Daniela Zahradnikova

87

Daniela Zahradnikova
Oliver Rothschild (AKA “The Fake Rothschild”)

88

Oliver Rothschild (AKA “The Fake Rothschild”)
Brooke Barzun (née Brooke Brown) – Ambassador’s wife

89

Brooke Barzun
The Inspector Clouseau lookalike

90

The Inspector Clouseau lookalike
The Ranting Crasher

91

The Ranting Crasher
Sir Ken Adam OBE (born Klaus Adam, 1921 – 2016)

92

Sir Ken Adam OBE (born Klaus Adam, 1921 – 2016)
Sabine Getty (née Ghanem, AKA ‘Sabine G’)

93

Sabine Getty (née Ghanem, AKA ‘Sabine G’)
Socialite and fashion PR Luigi Tadini

94

Luigi Tadini
Fly-fisherwoman Marina Gibson

95

Marina Gibson
Will and Calum Thompson

96

Will and Calum Thompson (AKA “The Eat Wild Boys”)
Nadja Swarovski-Adams

97

Nadja Swarovski-Adams (AKA “Nadja Swarovski”)

98

Eli wallach (1915 – 2014)

99

Princess yasmin aga khan

100

Theo james (born theodore peter james kinnaird taptiklis)
RISING STARS: PERSONALITIES

Tommy Banks
Tommy Banks – Born in 1989, rising star Michelin Star winning chef and Saturday Kitchen regular Tommy Banks’ co-owns The Black Swan at Oldstead, Oldestad, York, North Yorkshire, YO61 4BL.

Born in 1989, rising star Michelin Star winning chef  Tommy Banks’ establishment, The Black Swan at Oldstead in North Yorkshire, was voted the best restaurant in the world on TripAdvisor in 2017. A regular on the BBC’s Saturday Kitchen, Banks is also the co-host and a judge on The Big Family Cooking Showdown and owns Roots in York as well. Of his food, the critic Giles Coren commented: “They gave me cheese custard for my bread! It was so, so good. Angels sang. Birds fell stone-dead from trees” whilst Tatler’s Annabel Sampson described it as “true unadulterated pleasure.”

 

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