As ‘The Telegraph’ falls for tall tales from mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell’s brother Ian Maxwell about Prince Andrew’s infamous “bathtub bonk” at her home, we remind readers of the truth about that standard sized tub.
Matthew Steeples salutes Jeremy Clarkson for expressing honest thoughts about the deviant Duchess of Sussex (and especially for causing the soppy snowflake that is ‘MeGain’s mouthpiece Omid Scobie to have a meltdown as a result).
Whilst the Hamptons was the scene of “bidding wars” and “supermarket spats” over £275 bottles of Chablis during the 2020 coronavirus crisis, it’s become the scene of socialites being arrested in “wife beaters” for assaulting “glampin’ workers” in the 2022 cost-of-living-crisis.
As the story of a man who glued himself to a desk in a NatWest in Grimsby is declared “breaking news,” we delve into some other odd things that have gone on in this decidedly grim fishing port; they include it being the birthplace of the ‘Neighbours’ actress who played the bumptious busybody Mrs Mangel and home to the scissor stabber who used to be dresser to Sarah, Duchess of York.
WORLD EXCLUSIVE – Samantha Markle shares her thoughts on Prince Harry’s tittle-tattling tome ‘Spare’ with ‘The Steeple Times’; she slams it as likely “cold, malicious and reckless” and wishes he’d “spare us all the hypocritical pity party.”
WORLD EXCLUSIVE – ‘The Steeple Times’ interviews Samantha Markle – the sensible sister of the mendacious meddler formerly known as Meghan Markle – as she returns to Twitter courtesy of Elon Musk’s reopening of the social media network.
In yet again making it all about his anything but sorry self and tittle-tattling about his delusional worries about his personal security, the PR peddler for the Duchess of Sussex that is the maniac Omid Scobie yet again shows himself as a prized pillock and prat.
Prosecutors rightly demand mucky madam sex offender Ghislaine Maxwell gets maximum 55 years in the clink and thus likely deservedly dies there; they also want the deviant liar to pay the maximum £615,000 fine and call out her spreading “horror stories” about her incarceration as “unfounded.”
Hypocritical Duke and Duchess of Sussex deserve condemnation for indulging in £320,000 worth of private jet flights for their Jubilee trip; just who paid for these unwanted wastrels’ travels remains unknown.
Mother of God! Law firm give notice that the Duchess of Sussex’s pugnacious PR peddler Omid Scobie has been sent a cease and desist letter and reported to the Metropolitan Police regarding “the harassment, threats and stalking of Sadie Quinlan.”
The appointment of the PR peddling pillock Omid Scobie to ‘Royal Executive Editor’ at ‘Yahoo! News’ is just yet another own goal by the wicked wench formerly known as Meghan Markle; it is time this sop was simply told to “sod off!”
Matthew Steeples slams the vindictive campaign against YouTube sensation Sadie Quinlan – known as ‘Yankee Wally’ – by the mendacious ‘Sussex Squad’ groupies led by PR peddlers Omid Scobie and Christopher Bouzy and helped along by a bashful ‘BuzzFeed News’ busybody named Ellie Hall.