Friday, July 1, 2022
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Deranged Divas

Cash, Rockets & Mucky Madams 2022

As Ghislaine Maxwell’s former business partner Jemma Kidd takes part in a car rally that raises money for victims of sex trafficking, we again call out the ridiculous vanity project of rich-not-robust women that is Cash & Rocket.

Hypocrite Harry’s Jubilee Jet

Hypocritical Duke and Duchess of Sussex deserve condemnation for indulging in £320,000 worth of private jet flights for their Jubilee trip; just who paid for these unwanted wastrels’ travels remains unknown.

The End Is Nigh – Ghislaine Maxwell’s Sentencing Timeline

As sentencing approaches on 28th June, the end is nigh for Ghislaine Maxwell; elsewhere Elon Musk asks about her client list as the mucky madam’s pugnacious PR peddlers go crickets.

Scobie’s Childish Clownery Backfires

MeGain’s nodding dog PR peddler Omid Scobie claims “clownery” forced him to delete a tweet deemed by many “hateful” to a 4-year-old child, Prince Louis.

Booing Boris V Cooing Carrie – Johnsons Booed

As rumours swirl about whether they are still actually living together, Boris Johnson and his puppet mistress Carrie unsurprisingly got booed at Jubilee Service of Thanksgiving.

Chequer-ed Carrie – PM’s Wife Treats Staff Appallingly (Again)

As it is revealed Carrie Johnson has been abusive to staff at Chequers, perhaps it is time for her to be told: “Carrie Shouldn’t Live Here Anymore;” this demanding wench along with her hapless husband deserve kicking out of all of their grace-and-favour residences ASAP.

Meg & Amber – A Pugnacious Pair Of Woke Wazzocks Who Should Be Heard Less

Both blubbing bed sh*tter Amber Heard and boring botherer the Duchess of Sussex should be heard less and ignored more; it is time to cancel these woke wazzocks.

Restraining Poundland Pikey Pricey 2022 – Katie Price Faces Jail

As Katie Price is finally forced to face the prospect of jail for breaching a restraining order, we suggest it is time this “gutter slag” grew up.

Farting Fergie Gets Wind

As Sarah, Duchess of York talks about “standing strong… when the winds get violent,” we again remind this toesucking twerp to answer the question: “Did she ever repay the croaked paedophile Jeffery Epstein?”

The Montecito Meddler – Omid Scobie Strikes Again

As PR peddler for the ‘House of Montecito’ Omid Scobie again “rants” about the royals, all this one-time mate of the not so glamorous glamour model Jodie Marsh does is show himself up.

Mother of God! Omid Scobie’s Headed Down The Nick

Mother of God! Law firm give notice that the Duchess of Sussex’s pugnacious PR peddler Omid Scobie has been sent a cease and desist letter and reported to the Metropolitan Police regarding “the harassment, threats and stalking of Sadie Quinlan.”

Carrie Doesn’t Live Here Anymore – PM Wife Missing 2022

It seems “Carrie doesn’t live here anymore” has become the likely fate of Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s currently missing wine chucking puppet mistress as “Where is Carrie Johnson?” trends on Twitter.

Fergie Needs To Explain – Jeffrey Epstein Loan

Aside from showing audacity in wearing shoes featuring the words ‘Never Complain’ and ‘Never Explain’ after her ex-husband’s £12 million payout to a woman he claimed to have never met, isn’t it time that Sarah, Duchess of York confirms if she ever paid the paedophile Jeffrey Epstein back?

Depp v Maxwell –Trial Media Coverage Differences

Matthew Steeples suggests those moaning that Ghislaine Maxwell’s trial should have been covered by the media in the same way as Johnny Depp’s libel suit do not understand the differences between the two cases; there is simply no “conspiracy” or “cover-up” going on here.

Sod Off Scobie! Omid Scobie Gets New Gig At Yahoo!

The appointment of the PR peddling pillock Omid Scobie to ‘Royal Executive Editor’ at ‘Yahoo! News’ is just yet another own goal by the wicked wench formerly known as Meghan Markle; it is time this sop was simply told to “sod off!”

It’s NOT “Duchess Meghan”

In constantly referencing the Duchess of Sussex as “Duchess Meghan,” PR peddler and arse-licker Omid Scobie proves himself anything but an expert on royalty, titles, honours and protocol.

Abused To Abuser – No Excuses Ghislaine

As the ‘Daily Mail’ claims to share new ‘bombshell’ revelations suggesting Ghislaine Maxwell herself a victim of abuse, we remind them that this story is nothing new and abused to abuser should not be allowed as her excuse.

Give Up Ghislaine

After her attempt to get a retrial was rightly rejected and the BBC’s ‘House of Maxwell’ reveals that she used to make ‘miaow’ noises at her late father, it is now time for the mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell to give up and to also do the right thing – name names and finally tell the truth.

Facts & Feckless Fergie

As birdbrained Sarah, Duchess of York goes on a moneymaking tour in America, this debtor to croaked paedophile Jeffrey Epstein’s tweet about her thoughts on “facts” come back to bite her in her not so regal arse.

Wally of the Week 2022 – Prince Harry

In insulting his grandmother by deciding not to attend his grandfather’s memorial, Prince Harry yet again shows himself as nothing but a degenerate drip.

The Epstein-Maxwell Profiteers – Lady Victoria Hervey & Sarah, Duchess of York

As noxious nitwit Lady Victoria Hervey sticks her oar in over Ukraine, fellow Epstein-Maxwell associate and feckless fruitcake Sarah, Duchess of York heads off to the USA to try and rake in more wonga; shame on these pointless prattling profiteers.

MeGain’s Nemesis – Her Very Own Sister

Could the Duchess of Sussex’s half-sister Samantha Markle prove to be her ultimate nemesis? ‘Yankee Wally’ Sadie Quinlan most definitely thinks so.

Carrie On Up The Pun – Carrie Johnson Parties With David Pun

Newly discovered photograph shows notorious party crasher and pretend owner of Harvey Nichols David Pun living it up large with Carrie Johnson at the Russian Embassy in London back in 2012.

“Wild Times” With ‘Randy Andy’

As Prince Andrew’s notches on the bedpost non-counter Michael Wynne-Parker talks of their “wild times” bedding birds, we suggest the randy royal might do better to silence his chirping chums including ‘Lady Herpes’ also.

Yankee Wally v Omid Scobie 2022

As ‘MeGain’s’ bestie Omid Scobie claims Sadie Quinlan (AKA ‘Yankee Wally’) is “on a watch list” with the “good folk at South Wales Police and Scotland Yard” and the “Fixated Threat Assessment Centre” also, the popular YouTuber reports him to the police herself.

Vicky Vanishes – Lady Victoria Hervey Quits Twitter

Party pest and piffle peddling pillock Lady Victoria Hervey vanishes from Twitter; the mouthy moron likes to criticise others, yet clearly can’t take criticism herself.

The Truth About THAT 2001 Photo

Matthew Steeples questions the murky motives of those questioning the authenticity of THAT 2001 photo of Prince Andrew, Virginia Roberts and Ghislaine Maxwell; it is time that the personal profiteer Lady Victoria Hervey was called out for the fake that she is and it is time to remind the public that it is Ghislaine Maxwell and her avaricious associates who’ve actually been exposed for faking photos.

Mucky Madam’s Mark Twain Moment

As she faces sentencing for sex trafficking, morally bankrupt mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell turns to the words of morally superior Mark Twain; all they really have in common is mutual experience of financial bankruptcy.

Delusional Drip Tells Workers To Meditate

In telling companies to give their workers time to meditate when they should be working, Prince Harry shows himself as nothing but a delusional drip.

Randy Andy Turns To Toff Twerps

As Prince Andrew gets support from the dregs of society in the form of disgraced news baron felon toff Lord Black and washed up wastrel daughter of a criminal twerp Lady Victoria Hervey, we suggest he’s truly scraping the barrel.

Top Trumped or Top Tramped?

Will guffawing gadabout Prince Andrew’s antics in Tramp prove to be his downfall or will his old fellow golf and girl loving mucker Donald Trump come out to “wish him well”?

From ‘TwIt Girl’ to ‘InstaIdiot’ – Lady Victoria Hervey

Dumber than dumb non-entity Lady Victoria Hervey morphs from ‘TwIt Girl’ to ‘InstaIdiot’ in a series of Instagram posts about her mucky madam mate Ghislaine Maxwell; she charmingly labels one victim she doesn’t even know a “complete whore” and another she claims to actually know a “drug addict slut and a f*ck up.”

UnAppealing Ghislaine

Former federal prosecutor suggests convicted mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell’s chances of getting an appeal will have “major hurdles” and will “have to meet a very high standard.”

Curtains For Randy Andy

As a former Buckingham Palace employee reveals that “spoilt” Prince Andrew made her run up four flights of stairs to shut his curtains whilst he sat next to them, we suggest it’s now curtains for him.

Moron of the Moment 2022 – Lady Victoria Hervey

Lady Victoria Hervey’s latest airing to share irrelevant claims about Ghislaine Maxwell simply show her lack of connection with the real story; this tedious twerp ought to now learn the art of silence.

Buffoon Boris & Rotten Randy… Get A Room!

The blithering buffoon that is Boris Johnson and the randy rotter that is Prince Andrew should do the decent thing… Disappear from public view forever and get a room together with their weird wack job wives.

Friendless Fergie

Simpleton Sarah, Duchess of York “pauses” her unsurprisingly unpopular ‘Fergie & Friends’ YouTube channel as her increasingly friendless husband continues to face sexual assault allegations in New York.

Poundland MeGain – Duchess of Sussex Goes Bananas

In spite of her victory over ‘The Mail on Sunday’ all the Duchess of Sussex will be able to do with her winnings is afford a trip to Poundland; £1 ‘MeGain’ better now also watch out for metaphorical banana skins.

What’s Next For Mucky Madam Maxwell?

Matthew Steeples explains what’s next for convicted mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell as she faces a second trial and sentencing.

Heroes & Villains 2021 – The Best & Worst People of 2021

‘The Steeple Times’ chooses our Heroes & Villains 2021; the 25 best and 25 worst people of the last year and the 25 who’ll be missed and the 25 who won’t.

Keep His Kit On Cliff

Sanity reigns as Sir Cliff Richard announces “he would no longer be able to pose topless” and will thankfully keep his kit on instead.

Ghislaine Maxwell – From ‘Seasoned Socialite’ to ‘Sordid Sex Trafficker’

Matthew Steeples reflects on shamed sex trafficker Ghislaine Maxwell’s conviction and slams the BBC and Sky News for their coverage of the verdict; he also calls on the Met Police to reopen their 1994 investigation into the deviant’s activities in London.

The MeGain & Randy Show (Part II)

Virginia Roberts Giuffre would be wrong to rely on the narcissistic, lying Duchess of Sussex in her case against Prince Andrew… A rerun of the ‘MeGain & Randy Show’ would benefit utterly nobody.

Deluded & Deviant – ‘Farting Fergie’ & ‘Randy Andy’

For once Dan Wootton got it right in condemning ‘Randy Andy’ and ‘Farting Fergie’ as “deluded… self-centred… gauche… disgraced public figures.”

Lowbrow Lindsay Lohan Reaches A New Low

When you thought lowbrow loser Lindsay Lohan couldn’t go any lower, the ‘celebutard’ predictably delivers.