Sunday, February 25, 2024

Pointless Prattlers Team Up

That the pointless prattler the Duchess of Sussex is to team up with Sir Elton John’s titleless husband David Furnish for Netflix is nothing but oily

News that two equally pointless prattlers – Meghan, the mouthy Duchess of Sussex and the titleless moaner David Furnish – have teamed up isn’t surprising.


Coming together as executive producers for “a new animated series for Netflix,” the dastardly duo are to make a “series that follows a young girl’s adventures.” It has a working title of Pearl and cringeworthily will be “inspired by a variety of influential women from history.”


Pointless prattlers Meghan Duchess of Sussex Danny Williams David Furnish 1
A statement from Netflix announced the coming together of Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex and Sir Elton John’s hapless hubby David Furnish.

Taking to Instagram to reveal his thoughts on their partnership, the man who once bleated to the Daily Mail’s Sebastian Shakespeare that he’d effectively like to be called ‘Lady John’ as he didn’t think it fair that he hasn’t got a title announced:


“I am delighted that we are finally able to announce this exciting animated series. Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex and I are deeply passionate about bringing the inspirational and positive stories of extraordinary women from around the world to a global audience of all ages. The team collaborating on the series are first class, and @netflix are the perfect partner.”


Going further, ‘The Modern Day Mrs Simpson’ and the worse half of the duo that is ‘Cringe and Ginge’ added in a statement subsequently:


“Like many girls her age, our heroine Pearl is on a journey of self-discovery as she tries to overcome life’s daily challenges.”


“I’m thrilled that Archewell Productions, partnered with the powerhouse platform of Netflix, and these incredible producers, will together bring you this new animated series, which celebrates extraordinary women throughout history.”


“David Furnish and I have been eager to bring this special series to light, and I am delighted we are able to announce it today.”


Previously ever-so-private Furnish and continually ever-so-public ‘MeGain’ (in spite of claiming she wishes to be ever-so-private) frankly are two people the world could do without more from. Please, Netflix, change your position and do the decent thing: Keep this oily, ingratiating pair off our screens.


Pictured top: Titleless twerp David Furnish with a “nightclub hunk” he supposedly bought an apartment for, Danny Williams (left), and the alleged bully of multiple staff formerly known as Meghan Markle (right).


Meghan Markle David Furnish
Both the Duchess of Sussex and David Furnish are only really known globally for whom they are married to. This tedious pair truly are actually made for one another.
Matthew Steeples
Matthew Steeples
A graduate of the London School of Economics, Matthew Steeples is a writer and marketing consultant. He conceived The Steeple Times as a media arena to fill the void between the Mail Online, The Huffington Post and such organs as the New York Social Diary in 2012.


  1. Electric chairs required for both of these people. Both live off the previously good names of others – i.e. Prince Harry and Elton John.

  2. Says it all except one point. She’s named the book after herself (Welsh and Greek). She has used men all her life, and is associating herself as that 12 year old child (Pearl) reflecting on famous women who have made a difference to the world! What an unappetizing story that would unravel and reveal if Pearl’s journey was acted out within a continuation of the book!

  3. So what exactly is the bulky black boy on the yacht doing with Lady Furnish?
    Are they up to something, and does his grace, the Lord Elton know about all this?
    I think we should be told.
    As for the truly ghastly Duchess – ’nuff said!

  4. God, it’s like a horror film, “Revenge of the Bottom Feeders”. They’re joining forces to try to take over the world.


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