The Steeple Times

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  • ‘Bathtub Bonk Pad’ Back On Market – Ghislaine Maxwell London Home For Sale (Again) For Bonkers £3.25m Price

    ‘Bathtub Bonk Pad’ Back On Market – Ghislaine Maxwell London Home For Sale (Again) For Bonkers £3.25m Price

    WORLD EXCLUSIVE – Ghislaine Maxwell’s notorious London home –the very pad that caused Prince Andrew to pay out £12 million over sexual cavorting allegations relating to a “bathtub bonk” in 2001 – is astoundingly back up for sale for a bonkers sum nearly 100% higher than she ‘sold’ it for just 3 years ago; much of the mucky madam’s furniture bizarrely remains

    Just as the meddling mate of the mendacious mucky madam and her pension pot plundering papa that is Peter Mandelson has been ‘anointed’ in Game of Thrones style as Keir Starmer’s ambassador to the United States of America, it can be revealed that the infamous former London home of Ghislaine Maxwell is back on the market.

     

    Whilst properties, however sordid their histories, come up for sale now and again – for example, when we featured five of the worst ‘murder location houses’ offered for sale in November 2022, we were inundated with further suggestions – the totally unsurprising detail in the current Chestertons listing for 44 Kinnerton Street, Belgravia is that there is no mention of this mews house’s infamous past owner-occupier.

     

    Interestingly, however, the agency’s ‘current’ photographs of what The Steeple Times mocked in January 2022 as “Randy Andy’s Bathtub Bonk Pad” – given what allegedly went on between the Duke of York and a then 17-year-old then going by the name Virginia Roberts in the first-floor, full-sized bathtub of the residence on the 10th March 2001 – show a property that still includes free-standing furnishings that were present when representatives of the then incarcerated Miss Maxwell sold on 19th April 2021 for £1.75 million against a far more punchy initial asking price of £2.6 million. Indeed, it does seem most curious that the ‘purchasers’ decided to keep a set of naff 1970s tables and chairs that presumably belonged to the convicted sex trafficker – especially given they decided to throw out an equally gaudy pair of velvet curtains from the house that have now ended up on display in a Bristol art gallery as part of exhibition of all sorts of odd things that is rather appropriately titled Grey Unpleasant Land.

     

    In January 2022, ‘The Steeple Times’ was the first publication to share a photograph of the then unrenovated bathroom at 44 Kinnerton Street where Prince Andrew and Virginia Roberts (now Virginia Giuffre) allegedly bonked in the tub. The image we shared (top) provided proof that the tub was of a standard size and not “too small for any kind of activity whatsoever,” as Ghislaine Maxwell had stated during a 2015 defamation civil case brought after Maxwell called Giuffre a liar. The case was settled in 2017 in favour of Virginia Giuffre and at that time Ghislaine Maxwell was forced to pay damages. The same bathroom photographed in 2024 (bottom). The flooring and fittings all remain; the tiles have been changed, as have the bath taps.
    In January 2022, ‘The Steeple Times’ was the first publication to share a photograph of the then unrenovated bathroom at 44 Kinnerton Street where Prince Andrew and Virginia Roberts (now Virginia Giuffre) allegedly bonked in the tub. The image we shared (top) provided proof that the tub was of a standard size and not “too small for any kind of activity whatsoever,” as Ghislaine Maxwell had stated during a 2015 defamation civil case brought after Maxwell called Giuffre a liar. The case was settled in 2017 in favour of Virginia Giuffre and at that time Ghislaine Maxwell was forced to pay damages. The same bathroom photographed in 2024 (bottom). The flooring and fittings all remain; the tiles have been changed, as have the bath taps.
    When asked about what occurred on the night of 10th March 2001 in the first-floor bathroom at her Kinnerton Street mews house, Ghislaine Maxwell responded: “[Virginia Roberts] then characterized [sic] things took place in my bathroom in the bathtub itself. The tub is too small for any kind of activity whatsoever.” The picture of that very same tub used in marketing material by Wellbelove Quested and more recently Chestertons proved exactly to the contrary.
    When asked about what occurred on the night of 10th March 2001 in the first-floor bathroom at her Kinnerton Street mews house, Ghislaine Maxwell responded: “[Virginia Roberts] then characterized [sic] things took place in my bathroom in the bathtub itself. The tub is too small for any kind of activity whatsoever.” The picture of that very same tub used in marketing material by Wellbelove Quested and more recently Chestertons proved exactly to the contrary.
    A floor plan shared by the likes ‘The Daily Mail’ and ‘The Sun suggested the first-floor bathroom at 44 Kinnerton Street to be 7-foot, 4 inches by 7-foot, 2-inches. Floor plans shared by Wellboved Quested suggested that the room is actually 8-foot, 4-inches by 8-foot, 2-inches. Either way, there was most definitely plenty of room for two (and whatever activities might have gone on between that particular two-some)…
    A floor plan shared by the likes ‘The Daily Mail’ and ‘The Sun suggested the first-floor bathroom at 44 Kinnerton Street to be 7-foot, 4 inches by 7-foot, 2-inches. Floor plans shared by Wellboved Quested suggested that the room is actually 8-foot, 4-inches by 8-foot, 2-inches. Either way, there was most definitely plenty of room for two (and whatever activities might have gone on between that particular two-some)…
    Then and Now – The ground floor reception room of the house (top) as it was in “doctor’s waiting room” style in January 2022 (top) and as it now is in December 2024 (bottom) opened up to the kitchen. Note that though a wall and fitted furnishings have been removed and the flooring replaced, the somewhat naff dining table and chairs remain.
    Then and Now – The ground floor reception room of the house (top) as it was in “doctor’s waiting room” style in January 2022 (top) and as it now is in December 2024 (bottom) opened up to the kitchen. Note that though a wall and fitted furnishings have been removed and the flooring replaced, the somewhat naff dining table and chairs remain.

    Laughably lauded by Chestertons as “charming” and “wonderfully bright,” the 1,477 square foot three-storey building has admittedly been knocked around a bit during the current ownership. Gone is a clapped-out kitchen that grubby groper Ghislaine likely never cooked her vegan nosh in and gone also is the wall between that room and the adjoining former “dentist’s waiting room-style” reception room where Maxwell and Jeffrey Epstein’s London victims were likely lined-up for the vilest forms of sexual abuse. Also replaced are the fittings in the primary bathroom in what would have been the ‘Mucky Madam Master Suite’ on the top floor, but what is beyond bizarre is that the house’s most horrid bit of history survives for posterity virtually intact. The very same first floor full-sized bathroom where sexual relations allegedly occurred that caused Prince Andrew to allegedly pay £12 million to the aforementioned Virginia Roberts Giuffre (without any admission of guilt) remains virtually unaltered.

     

    In that very bathroom, next to the very landing where the ‘killer’ photograph of Miss Maxwell, Miss Roberts and the late Queen Elizabeth’s favourite son were so inconveniently snapped on 10th March 2001, the very same full-sized shower and the very same full-sized bathtub that The Steeple Times proved Ghislaine Maxwell lied about during her April 2016 deposition at the law offices of Boies Schiller & Flexner in New York in an article we published in January 2022 remains in-situ. Yes, the walls have been retiled and the taps have been changed, but every other element of the room’s grotty days of old remain as a kind of Miss Havisham-esque horror memorial.

     

    When asked during the videotaped and subsequently transcribed 2016 deposition, which was given before one Leslie Fagin, a court reporter and notary public in the State of New York, about the photograph and sexual activities in the first-floor bathroom, Maxwell went full ‘porky-pie’ about her ‘standard’ five-foot-six-inches length bathtub and snapped:

     

    “What I’m representing is that [Virginia Roberts Giuffre’s] entire ludicrous and absurd story of what took place in my house is an obvious lie… She claimed things took place in my bathroom in London. Her characterizations [sic] is just not possible… She then characterized things took place in my bathroom itself. The tub is too small for any type of activity whatsoever.”

     

    Clearly buyers are not flocking to purchase a pad of which Maxwell lied about and one of which Loyd Grossman might ask: “Who the hell would want to pay £3.45 million to live in a pugnacious pad like this?” In spite of spending less than a month on the market, Ghislaine Maxwell’s former lair – complete with its historical bonking bathtub – has just had its price slashed by a not-so-insubstantial £200,000 to ‘just’ £3.25 million.

     

    Editor’s note – Unlike as is the case in many publications, this article was NOT sponsored or supported by a third-party. Follow Matthew Steeples on Twitter at @M_Steeples and watch his shows on YouTube at @mjs2781/streams.

     

    A message from our editorial team – Thank you for reading this article. We’re more reliant on your support than ever as the shift in consumer habits brought about by coronavirus and the cost-of-living crisis impacts our advertisers. If you haven’t already, please consider supporting our trusted, fact-checked journalism by supporting our work via Patreon.

     

    Then and Now – The somewhat decrepit kitchen, as it was in January 2022 (top), and as it now is, after being opened into the adjoining reception room (bottom) in December 2024.
    Then and Now – The somewhat decrepit kitchen, as it was in January 2022 (top), and as it now is, after being opened into the adjoining reception room (bottom) in December 2024.
    Then and Now – The ‘Mucky Madam Maxwell Suite’ at the top of the house as it was in January 2022 (top) and now is (bottom) in December 2024.
    Then and Now – The ‘Mucky Madam Maxwell Suite’ at the top of the house as it was in January 2022 (top) and now is (bottom) in December 2024.
    The house under renovation in July 2021 and November 2023.
    The house under renovation in July 2021 and November 2023.
    The curtains binned during the renovations were featured in a review by ‘The Guardian’ in November 2024 of a new exhibition that debuted at the Spike Island gallery in Bristol. Amongst the items shown in ‘Grey Unpleasant Land’ are a set of sun-bleached red velvet curtains. Of them, the paper’s Evan Moffitt observed: “Described as having been acquired from the 2020 clearance of 44 Kinnerton Street, Belgravia. A Google search will tell you that the house belonged to Ghislaine Maxwell, convicted associate of sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein. It’s understandable why the artists chose not to name her, though without the extra effort, the drapes are a mysterious stage prop. Throughout, the show poses questions about how objects accrue value and meaning, which often comes down to how much or how little they’re framed. Maxwell is very much the elephant in the room alongside items from the same class as the person she set up with underage girls.” One could instead argue that it is curtains for sanity in Britain when Ghislaine Maxwell’s stained curtains are considered worthy as “art exhibits.”
    The curtains binned during the renovations were featured in a review by ‘The Guardian’ in November 2024 of a new exhibition that debuted at the Spike Island gallery in Bristol. Amongst the items shown in ‘Grey Unpleasant Land’ are a set of sun-bleached red velvet curtains. Of them, the paper’s Evan Moffitt observed: “Described as having been acquired from the 2020 clearance of 44 Kinnerton Street, Belgravia. A Google search will tell you that the house belonged to Ghislaine Maxwell, convicted associate of sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein. It’s understandable why the artists chose not to name her, though without the extra effort, the drapes are a mysterious stage prop. Throughout, the show poses questions about how objects accrue value and meaning, which often comes down to how much or how little they’re framed. Maxwell is very much the elephant in the room alongside items from the same class as the person she set up with underage girls.” One could instead argue that it is curtains for sanity in Britain when Ghislaine Maxwell’s stained curtains are considered worthy as “art exhibits.”
    A floor plan of 44 Kinnerton Street prior to the renovations that came after the April 2021 sale.
    A floor plan of 44 Kinnerton Street prior to the renovations that came after the April 2021 sale.
    A floor plan of the house illustrating the changes to the ground floor layout.
    A floor plan of the house illustrating the changes to the ground floor layout.
    In July 2021, ‘The Steeple Times’ shared an image of an open door at 44 Kinnerton Street when the house was undergoing external repainting. The bannister pictured clearly is exactly the same one featured in the March 2001 image of Prince Andrew, Virginia Roberts and Ghislaine Maxwell on the first-floor landing of the property.
    In July 2021, ‘The Steeple Times’ shared an image of an open door at 44 Kinnerton Street when the house was undergoing external repainting. The bannister pictured clearly is exactly the same one featured in the March 2001 image of Prince Andrew, Virginia Roberts and Ghislaine Maxwell on the first-floor landing of the property.
    In 2019, Shaun Attwood of ‘Shaun Attwood’s True Crime Channel’ interviewed a lady who answered the door at 44 Kinnerton Street. In the footage he subsequently uploaded to YouTube, the bannister is again seen still in-situ.
    In 2019, Shaun Attwood of ‘Shaun Attwood’s True Crime Channel’ interviewed a lady who answered the door at 44 Kinnerton Street. In the footage he subsequently uploaded to YouTube, the bannister is again seen still in-situ.

    The Names & Numbers – ‘Mucky Madam Ghislaine Maxwell’s Bathtub Bonk Pad’ – 44 Kinnerton Street, Belgravia, London, SW1X 8ES, United Kingdom

    • Late December 2024 – £200,000 is slashed off the listing price of the property, taking the asking price to £3.25 million ($4.09 million, €3.92 million or درهم15 million), a sum 86% higher than the April 2021 selling price.

     

    • Early December 2024 – 44 Kinnerton Street is again listed for sale, this time by Chestertons. It is priced at £3.45 million ($4.34 million, €4.16 million or درهم15.94 million), a sum 97% higher than the April 2021 selling price, but is now available on a freehold instead of leasehold basis.

     

    • 18th November 2023 – The Sun’s Jane Matthews reported that 44 Kinnerton Street was “getting a major revamp” and was “covered in scaffolding.” Matthews suggested “the new owners” were thought to be a developer and quoted a management accountant named Wendy Howard, “who has worked on Kinnerton Street for ten years,” as saying: “I know [representatives of Maxwell] sold the property fairly quickly and for a discount. I’m surprised, it’s not really the type of house anyone would want to buy. It really has the wrong associations. Personally, I thought the whole situation was seedy and very disappointing… You do see some tourist groups going past, but it’s not very well known that Maxwell used to live around here. Sometimes you see people filming or making documentaries, so sometimes people ask about the house, but not too often.”

     

    • 19th October 2022 – The MailOnline’s Stewart Carter reported that “locals refuse to talk about the black spot on their street” in an article that also suggested the house “has not been lived in since Maxwell sold it… to pay her legal fees in 2021” and added: “It is collecting cobwebs and dust as locals grow increasingly frustrated about its eerie past.” Maxwell’s ‘friend’ – who was meant, but ultimately did not give in evidence in her trial, Kevin Moran, was referenced also. He stated: “It’s all investment – nobody lives here.”

     

    • 14th January 2022 – Property website TheMoveMarket.com values the house at £2.11 million ($2.88 million, €2.53 million or درهم9.75 million), a sum 19% lower than the current asking price for the unrenovated property.

     

    • January 2022 – Estate agents Wellbelove Quested offer the mews house for £2.6 million ($3.6 million, €3.1 million or درهم1 million), an extraordinary increase of 49% on the sale price just 270 days earlier. The house is offered on a lease of 127 years that commenced on 24th June 2014 and previously on their website Wellbelove Quested had marketed the house for a higher price of £2.75 million ($3.738 million, €3.283 million or درهم13.731 million).

     

    • July 2021 – The Steeple Times reports on repainting work to the outside of the house being underway. An open door reveals the infamous staircase bannister to still be in-situ.

     

    • 19th April 2021 – Records confirm the house to have been sold for £1.75 million ($2.39 million, €2.09 million or درهم79 million). Details about the beneficiary of the sum from this sale are not publicly available.

     

    • March 2021 – Ghislaine Maxwell’s lawyer offered cash from the “pending sale of her £1.45 million ($2 million, €1.74 million or درهم28 million)” home as part of a package when they sought bail for the mucky madam for a third time, the Daily Mail reported. This sum was 44% lower than the September 2020 asking price and 400% higher than the January 1997 purchase price.

     

    • March 2021 – A Knightsbridge estate agent told The Steeple Times: “Knowing the street as I do, 44 is one of the smaller houses which I assume it to be a little over 1,000 square foot in size. Depending on the condition, I estimate the freehold value to be circa £1.8 million to £2 million ($2.5 million to $2.7 million, €2.2 million to €2.4 million or 9درهم million to درهم10 million).”

     

    • December 2020 – Members of the Maxwell family attempted to raise finance on the property but are not successful, The Steeple Times learns from a financier with connections to the Maxwell family and their representatives. They were rejected on the basis of the “toxicity” of their familial name.

     

    • September 2020 – Estate agents Aylesford list 44 Kinnerton Street for sale for £2.6 million ($3.6 million, €3.1 million or درهم1 million) on (it was claimed) a freehold basis, a sum 797% than the January 1997 purchase price. They subsequently later reduce the asking price to £2.1 million ($2.9 million, €2.5 million or درهم10.5 million) “according to a leading property expert.”

     

    • August 2019 – According to Insider, a woman with “long hair [who] appeared to be in her 60s” was seen entering the property. She “denied that the socialite owns or lived in the house, claiming instead that the elusive socialite lived elsewhere down the street.”

     

    • 10th March 2001 – Prince Andrew allegedly had sexual relations with 17-year-old Virginia Roberts in a bathroom in the property. He continues to deny this occurred whilst claiming that a photograph of himself with Miss Roberts and Ghislaine Maxwell on the first floor of building is a fake also.

     

    • 22nd January 1997 – Ghislaine Maxwell paid £290,000 ($396,000, €347,000 or درهم5 million) for the three-storey leasehold mews house. It is situated at the heart of the Duke of Westminster’s Grosvenor Estate.

     

    • 1989 to 1995 – Ghislaine Maxwell is known to have resided at 69 Stanhope Mews East, South Kensington, London, SW7 5QT. Her father bought it for her two years before his mysterious death and she reportedly “groomed and befriended Minor Victim 3 in London, England, between approximately 1994 and 1995… Maxwell introduced Minor Victim 3 to Epstein and during those interactions, Maxwell encouraged Minor Victim 3 to massage Epstein, knowing that Epstein would engage in sex acts with Minor Victim 3. During those massages, Epstein sexually abused Minor Victim 3” at that very property. It was sold for £267,000 ($365,000, €320,000 or درهم3 million) on 15th March 1995 and then again for £1.75 million ($2.39 million, €2.10 million or درهم8.77 million) on 30th August 2019.

     

    Further images of the house (as presented in December 2024) illustrate internal redecoration has occurred, but that not much has been done with the external roof terrace…

    Second bedroom 2024
    Master bedroom 2024 1
    Master bathroom 2024
    Roof terrace 2024

    THAT 2001 Photo STILL NOT PROVEN A FAKE – The 10th March 2001 photograph of Prince Andrew, Virginia Roberts and Ghislaine Maxwell at 44 Kinnerton Street, Belgravia

    10th March 2001 44 Kinnerton Street Ghislaine Maxwell Virginia Roberts Prince Andrew

    The photograph, taken supposedly by Jeffrey Epstein on the first-floor landing at 44 Kinnerton Street, Belgravia, London, SW1X 8ES, United Kingdom, has been shared by the world’s media in hundreds of thousands of articles and analysed countless times by countless experts.

     

    In November 2019, the Daily Mail’s Inderdeep Bains called it: “The photograph that WON’T go away” and it, as of date, has NEVER been discredited. Amongst evidence suggesting it to be perfectly real is that:

     

    • The setting of the photograph has been confirmed as genuine by the Maxwell family. Of it, in March 2021, Ian Maxwell told Radio 4’s Today programme: “I do recognise that setting.”
    • The window in the picture has the same features as the front first floor windows of 44 Kinnerton Street.
    • The width of the first floor landing is accurate to the measurements shown in the floor plan of the sales brochure prepared on the 14th October 2021 by estate agents Wellbelove Quested.
    • Though he claimed to be “at a loss to explain this particular photograph” during the 2019 BBC interview, the Duke of York has admitted to having visited 44 Kinnerton Street. He stated: “I don’t think I think ever went upstairs… The dining room and everything was on the ground floor.” Contradicting the royal, sources have claimed that the room behind him, Roberts and Maxwell in the photograph was used as a sitting room.
    • The heights of all three individuals in the picture look to be accurate proportionately.
    • Prince Andrew’s “chubby fingers” are clear to see. The Queen’s second son’s fingers are clearly “chubby fingers” and these very same “chubby fingers” have been seen hundreds of thousands of times in hundreds of thousands of other photographs.
    • Prince Andrew has claimed he only ever goes out in London in a suit and tie. Images of him in open necked shirts in the capital – including one of him leaving the nightclub Chinawhite – prove to the contrary.
    • Prince Andrew has claimed he does not “do” hugs and and embraces in photographs. Images of him taken in St Tropez embracing the US socialite Chris Von Aspen in July 2007 suggest the alleged non-sweater is wrong also on that score.
    • The outfit worn by Virginia Roberts – a woman who has already received financial settlements from Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell – has been seen on her in photographs of her at Naomi Campbell’s 2001 birthday party in France. In spite of some suggestions that a lady only wears an outfit once, we counter that a lady in Miss Roberts’ unfortunate situation would be forced to wear what she was told appealed to those in control of her wished her to wear.
    • Matthew Steeples of The Steeple Times and Shaun Attwood of Shaun Attwood’s True Crime Channel have both seen inside 44 Kinnerton Street and the stair rail shown in the photo remains in place and is thus genuine to the setting. Attwood subsequently released film footage of this on his YouTube channel and The Steeple Times shared its most recent image of the open front door with the stair rail beyond in July 2021.
    • Many experts have repeatedly stated photo manipulation was in its infancy at the time that this image first surfaced.
    • The FBI have never questioned the authenticity of the image.

     

    The TRUE FAKE PHOTO – The August 2019 photograph of Ghislaine Maxwell at an In-N-Out Burger restaurant

    Ghislaine-Maxwell-In-N-Out-Burger-fake-photo

    It must be remembered that the now convicted mucky madam sex offender Ghislaine Maxwell was likely involved in leaking that infamous “too perfect” photoshopped image of herself at an In-N-Out Burger restaurant in Los Angeles in August 2019. Aside from this wicked woman – whom bangs on about being vegan constantly now – “planting herself for a double-double” burger, that image was subsequently debunked by The Cut. For them, Bridget Read stated:

     

    “The intrepid Daily Mail checked out the location of the burger joint in Hollywood where Maxwell was allegedly spotted by a regular last week and found some odd discrepancies. Notably, a bus stop in the background of the shot shows an advertisement for the movie Good Boys – which the company that operates the ad space said has never been there. The bus stop currently displays an ad for a local hospital, which it says has been there since July 28. Maxwell was supposedly photographed at the In-N-Out on August 12.”

     

    “Questions about Maxwell’s lunch outing have fed into the already robust set of conspiracy theories around Epstein, his high-profile acquaintances, and his death. Why was a second smartphone on the In-N-Out table? Why did Maxwell never stick a straw in either her soda or her shake? Why did the diner who supposedly photographed her have such a nice camera, with a lens that took a very clear photo? It doesn’t help that the In-N-Out employees at that location have been forbidden, supposedly by their employer, to talk about Maxwell’s visit.”

     

    “If [family friend and attorney Leah] Saffian did indeed leak the photo of Maxwell, it was likely to try and throw the FBI off her scent… If the In-N-Out photo is indeed doctored, Maxwell could be anywhere and could show up anywhere she pleases. What’s next? Some predictions: eating a hot dog on the steps of the Met, posing with a cactus at Joshua Tree, riding a unicycle at Burning Man, or painting her nails on the C train.”

     

  • A Carbonara Calamity – Feckless Fergie & Creepy Christian Crooner Cliff Appear on ‘This Morning’

    A Carbonara Calamity – Feckless Fergie & Creepy Christian Crooner Cliff Appear on ‘This Morning’

    What was Martin Frizell thinking in allowing carbonara munching Sarah, Duchess of York to guest edit and co-host ‘This Morning’ and what was he thinking in pairing her up with the creepy Christian crooner and “fat shamer” Sir Cliff Richard?

    On Monday, notable aubergine loather Martin Frizell continued his “ill-judged” ways and brought two of the most cretinous Brits available onto the show he laughably attempts to “edit” for ITV, This Morning.

     

    Frizell’s especially dreadful pairing? She who happily took loans and other benefits (without necessarily ever repaying) from the since croaked paedophile Jeffrey Epstein, Sarah, Duchess of York, and the creepy Christian crooner known best for crying on his kitchen floor, Sir Cliff Richard. Quite frankly, this choice can only be surmised as one taken by a halfwit.

     

    Frizzell – whom was deservedly condemned by John Nicholson MP as “outrageously dismissive and flippant on camera about [the] immensely serious issue” of the Phillip Schofield scandal back in June during a hearing of the Culture, Media and Sport Committee – is definitely a chap with skin thicker than an aubergine. However, in inviting “needy and greedy” Sarah, Duchess of York to guest edit and co-host ITV1’s flagship morning show, he most certainly scored yet another own goal and most definitely caused another nail to be banged into this tacky show’s coffin.

     

    Featuring a segment in which ‘Feckless Fergie’ apparently decided a winner of Iron Chef UK in 2010 named Marcus Bean should cook her carbonara – a rather simple to make dish she claimed she’d never actually seen being made before – here was an example of a car crash calamity that lasted an excruciating two-and-a-half hours. In it, the live-in ex-wife of non-sweaty ‘Randy’ Prince Andrew laughed like a hyena and pranced like a show pony; she had no idea what she was doing and quite frankly brought shame on her royal relatives.

     

    Whilst one should ask if this tawdry twerp – whom, during a phone-in segment about relationships, crassly advised ‘Suzanne from Newcastle’ to start wearing “saucy underwear sets” to spice up her and her hubby’s somewhat lacking sex lives – had sought out the advice of His Majesty King Charles’s advisors before agreeing to a television ‘outing’ of this type, another question has to be: “How much was this mother of two princesses paid for what could be the first of a series of “co-host” appearances?”

     

    “It’s your show, I’ll be the fluff” giggled the former Sarah Ferguson as the show started. By the end, she was lauded as having “totally undersold [herself]” by a somewhat soppy Dermot O’Leary, but her final guest of choosing just truly illustrated what a prized pillock this wastrel wazzock genuinely, really genuinely is.

     

    Whilst some – myself included in the past – have pointed out that this apologist for a Pizza Express loving prince known best for hanging around with despots and dictators and for paying around £12 million to a woman he allegedly did not have sexual relations often exhibits childish ways in her way of thinking, her description of Devil Woman singer ‘Cliffy’ was yet another in a long line of outings of her appallingly bad judgment.

     

    After bigging-up the one-time mate of the croaked child abuser Rolf Harris as “humble and kind,” the “Peter Pan of Pop” turned nasty. He spoke of how he hadn’t wanted to be photographed with Elvis Presley because “he’d put on weight… If I’m having him hanging on my refrigerator, of course he’s got to look good” and did so in front of a self-professed ‘larger’ lady, Alison Hammond. Then “put in his place,” as the MailOnline’s Laura Parkin referenced the response to the museli muncher, Hammond quipped back: “You should never have put it off just because they’re a little bit heavier… Is that why you don’t want me at your house?” Bizarrely, Fergie didn’t bat an eyelid.

     

    Editor’s note – Unlike as is the case in many publications, this article was NOT sponsored or supported by a third-party. Follow Matthew Steeples on Twitter at @M_Steeples and watch his current nightly show on YouTube at 8pm GMT daily.

     

    A message from our editorial team – Thank you for reading this article. We’re more reliant on your support than ever as the shift in consumer habits brought about by coronavirus and the cost-of-living crisis impacts our advertisers. If you haven’t already, please consider supporting our trusted, fact-checked journalism by supporting our work via Patreon.

     

    Twitter poll Sarah Duches of York This Morning
    On Monday 20th November on Twitter, Matthew Steeples asked: “Is it appropriate for non-sweaty Prince Andrew’s live-in ex-wife Sarah, Duchess of York to lower herself to ‘co-hosting’ funeral queue-jumper’s favourite show ‘This Morning’?” He added the hahtags: #ThisMorning #ITV #Fergie #DuchessOfYork #PrinceAndrew #royal #royalty #outrage #disgrace and of the four available responses, 43.7% favoured the answer: “No – Shameful; Tacky” whilst 33.7% opted for “No – Shows ITV’s decline.” Just 14.2% felt: “Yes – She’s a fun choice” whilst only 8.4% supported: “Yes – She needs the wonga.”
    Mirror poll Sarah Duches of York This Morning
    On the same day, ‘The Mirror’ asked: “Do you think Cliff Richard’s comments on ‘This Morning’ were inappropriate?” 83% of respondents unsurprisingly answered: “Yes, they were.”

    Feckless Fergie’s ‘This Morning’ F**k-up… The Main Moments…

    To her This Morning co-hosts Alison Hammond and Dermot O’Leary on Monday 20th November 2023: “We’re on. I’m terrified. It’s your show, I’ll be the fluff.”

     

    Appropriately given her penchant for wonga-wonga (especially from the likes of the late, not-so-great Jeffrey Epstein), whilst spinning a wheel in a game named Spin to Win: “Show me the money.”

     

    Asked by Dermot O’Leary: “Can you just give us a little insight into what Christmas dinner is like with the royal family?” the normally turbo-tongued Fergie answered: “Beans on toast.”

     

    Asked about her relationships with people: “I prefer animals. It’s all about kindness.”

     

    “I think I’ve been around the block. It’s cool to be here, but cool people don’t say it’s cool.”

     

    Of what she gets upto in relationships: “I used to leave love notes…. I love a little note in the pocket. I love the moment where he suddenly or she suddenly puts their hand in the pocket and sees a love note. I used to do that – put them in the squash shoes.”

     

    During a phone-in about relationships whilst playing at being an agony aunt: “Ask me just about anything, ring in about love, relationships, hard times.” (ITV clearly did not allow anyone to phone in about ‘Randy’ Prince Andrew nor the many times ‘Feckless Fergie’ has dragged the royal family’s ‘good name’ through the mire).

     

    Illustrating that she hasn’t a clue how to boil a bowl of pasta, to her carbonara cook, Marcus Bean: “You’re very good looking… Do people really listen to him whilst in the bath?”

     

    “I really love that you have shown me how to [cook carbonara] and that is the first time I have seen it done.”

     

    To a caller, Suzanne from Newcastle, wanting relationship advice: “Yah. Get a lovely saucy underwear set from your chest of drawers, blow dry the hair and take him out on a treat… It’s the element of surprise and it will bring the magic back into your relationship… It needs to be more treats that he’s lost for words.”

     

    “You’ve got this Suzanne and I’m so proud of you calling today and being so brave to ring us. Well done you. Now, get that sexy underwear out.”

     

    To other callers, clearly not realising the ongoing cost of living crisis for most viewers: “There need to be more treats. Treats. Treats. Treats… Lovely, lovely restaurants and lovely hotels.”

     

    To a caller whose husband likes climbing: “You could say: Darling, I’ve booked your favourite place to climb, I will just be, you know, just waiting when you come back, you go climbing and when you come back we can have a lovely weekend with the saucy underwear on… Rekindle.”

     

    Of Artificial Intelligence (AI): “I don’t think anyone watching should be frightened of AI. Maybe, progressing, going forward, it can be a useful tool.”

     

    Of looking after rehomed dogs: “Do you shave the chest first if they are ‘vairy’ hairy?”

     

    Of creepy Christian crooner Sir Cliff Richard: “I’m lost for words and that’s just very unlike me… You are a musical treasure… You’re incredible, I can’t get over it, it’s just incredible… All those hip moves.”

     

    “You really are as humble and as kind as you always have been. How do you do that?” (He pompously answered: “For me, it comes easily.”

     

    To the tawdry presenters of ITV1’s Loose Women whilst Gloria Hunniford danced like a fool just before the end of her first This Morning guest edit and co-host session: “I feel like I’m back home again.”

     

    The Media Response…

    Stuart Heritage, The Guardian (1 star out of 5): “Sarah Ferguson’s love tips make a doomed show even more disastrous… Can the Duchess of York present TV? Not one bit. Does the Autocue short-circuit her brain? Oh yes. Will she save this sinking ship? Never?”

     

    “Is Sarah Ferguson an experienced television presenter? No she is not. Does she look as if she has ever watched a single episode of daytime television in her life? Also no. Can she read full sentences? On the basis of her performance today, it’s debatable. Did the whole thing stink of a publicity stunt designed purely to drown out the show’s obvious death rattle? God, yes.”

     

    “Clearly, the heroes here are Hammond and O’Leary, two exceptionally safe pairs of hands, who managed to guide Ferguson through the show in the same way you help a drunk friend safely through their front door. The presenters were perfect foils to the duchess throughout and this stupid attention-seeking act would have fallen apart in seconds without them.”

     

    “Let’s be clear, getting Ferguson to host This Morning was a very silly idea. None of it made for good, or even very competent, television. But it did give you the same sort of thrill that you got at school whenever a dog broke through the fence and started running around the playing field. For a show that’s in as much trouble as This Morning is, it just about counts as a victory.”

     

    Tina Campbell for The Standard: “Viewers have been left unimpressed by Sarah, Duchess of York’s ‘painful’ co-hosting debut.”

     

    Jan Moir, Daily Mail: “Sarah, Duchess of York, guest-edited and co-presented a special edition of This Morning (ITV) on Monday. I want to be honest. I want to be kind. Yet when it comes to the Duchess in a live television situation, these two virtues become mutually and volcanically exclusive.”

     

    “From 10am until the show ended, 150 white-knuckle minutes later, the Ferg launching herself on to daytime television, like Icarus in reverse thrust, was every bit as marvelously terrible as I had hoped.”

     

    “Hard to pick a highlight amongst the word-mangling, corgi-wrangling spaghetti cook-in and the interview with Sir Cliff Richard (Fergie: ‘You really are as humble and as kind as you always have been, how do you do that?’ Sir Cliff: ‘For me, it comes easily.’ But her brief turn as a phone-in agony aunt was exquisite.”

     

    “‘Basically she has been around the block and she is here to help,’ said host Dermot O’Leary, making Fergie sound like an obliging pony with a dodgy past and the foamy fetlocks to match – and to be fair, that is not a million miles from the truth.”

     

    “In her green outfit and pixie boots, she looked like Mad Mother Elf, a panto character in search of a plot, which also kind of sums up her life to date… Still, this may have been the most exciting episode of This Morning in the show’s history.”

     

    The Twitter Response…

    “Sorry, I tuned out… I haven’t unclenched my fists since 10am.”

     

    “The whole Sarah Ferguson thing is so random and actually quite awkward to watch.”

     

    “Any comment about ‘Mr Humble’ fat shaming Elvis, making Alison having to comment with no support from you [Sarah, Duchess of York] or Dermot? You’ve had terrible things said about your weight, but still groveled to that vile man [Sir Cliff Richard]. State of him.”

     

    “How weird that This Morning got rid of John Leslie, Fred Talbot and Phillip Schofield – but they bring in the paedophile loan taker Sarah Ferguson.”

     

    “‘How do we keep our spark alive?’ … Sarah Ferguson… Letting your husband go on a lads’ holiday. If has a mate with a private island in the Caribbean, that’s ideal. Always used to cheer Andrew right up!”

     

    “Husband said this morning that Sarah, Duchess of York giving relationship advice is like the fox in the hen house teaching chickens.”

     

    “Oh dear, Sarah Ferguson – who “sold Andrew for £500,000 in cash for royal access scandal” – gets her own television programme show. #ThisMorning.”

     

    “So Cliff Richard fat shaming Elvis and saying he didn’t want a photo of him hanging on his fridge forever. After, Sarah Ferguson called him ‘humble.’ What the actual heck?”

     

    “Who on earth thought Sarah Ferguson would make good telly?”

     

    “Sarah Ferguson mentioned on Epstein flight logs, but This Morning wants to hire her. Has anyone asked any questions about this?”

     

    The Previous Weird Words of “Greedy” and “Needy” Freeloader Sarah, Duchess of York…

    Sarah, Duchess of York, the live-in ex-wife at Royal Lodge, Windsor of supposedly skint ‘Randy Andy’ – a non-sweating nuisance who got his long-suffering relatives to pay a supposed sum of circa £12 million to Virginia Roberts Giuffre, a woman he has previously claimed to have met – is known for her weird warblings. They number:

     

    Of sex, herself and goats: “One of the worst headlines said 82% [of the population] would rather sleep with a goat than Fergie. It’s never left me.”

     

    Of her writing novels and her style: “Sherlock Holmes meets Peaky Blinders.”

     

    Of the royal family: “They tried to put the little redhead in a cage.”

     

    Of her own family: “I do believe in family unity. I think forgiveness is key.”

     

    Of the Duke of York: “A good man… In 1986, I married a very good man. Zip.”

     

    Of whether she might remarry Prince Andrew: “Oh bless your heart, no. I think we’re great as we are.”

     

    Of supporting her disgraced ex-husband financially: “I will always be there [for Prince Andrew].”

     

    “When Andrew went through a hard time, I used to be able to throw it to ‘The Boss.’”

     

    “Since he stepped back [from royal duties] he doesn’t actually take taxpayers’ money and I’m in a position where I can support him and the rest of the family through my work. And I’m really pleased and proud to do that.”

     

    “All I will say is that for many years now – it started with Budgie the Little Helicopter – I’ve really pushed to look after my girls and to contribute to the York family life.”

     

    Of where she and the Duke of York will end up living in the future: “Honestly, I operate from living in the present. You never get complacent and it makes for a better day because you never get disappointed, then. You look at life and you go, we can adapt, we can be flexible.”

     

    Of whether she might remarry someone else: “I think I’ve got too much baggage. I look at today and if suddenly I find love again, well, that’s another bonus, isn’t it?”

     

    Of her daughters Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie: “Exceptional… I love my girlies, I’m so proud of them. They are exceptional children… If mum’s OK, they’re OK.”

     

    “My daughters come first in my life, they always have. Because I lost my mum so early, I’m subconsciously very present with them. When I brought them up, I always left my problems at the door. Your problem is not their problem – it’s not their fault. We laugh together a lot. We are just very close.”

     

    Of her grandchildren: “I’m ‘Super Gran’… When my grandchildren see me, they immediately laugh because they know I’m going to be up to something, up to no good somewhere.”

     

    “Every time I think about about co-parenting and co-grandparenting and about divorce, marriage and all these different things, I still come back to the principle that the sun will come up tomorrow, and be grateful, just get on with it.”

     

    Of the late Queen Elizabeth II: “For me, she was more a mother than my own mother. Aren’t I the luckiest person alive to have had that great honour? When I was with her, I used to say: ‘I can’t believe it. People wait and put on their best dress to have an audience with you, and I’m wandering around the garden in wellies!’”

     

    “For the whole nation, for the world. Steadfast, consistent, iconic. [She had an] extraordinary ability to put someone at ease. I still now think it was such an honour [to have known her].”

     

    “During the last three years, her poor son [was] going through such a tumultuous time… And I think HM was very relieved I could help her with him, so we became even closer, then.”

     

    “I’m so lucky. All my life, I was lucky enough to know ‘The Boss,’ HM. Like the nation and the world, she was always there. It was like having a hand at your back. It just made you always strive for being better and trying to be better, learning from her, whenever you were with her just taking everything she said as a memory. She was such an incredible legend for us all.”

     

    Of the late Queen’s corgis: “They’re very good boys, they’re very gentle. I think they knew that they weren’t to jump up and be naughty. They used to sit and watch the racing with her. And when you give them a biscuit, they don’t snatch. They’re very special, they’re national treasures.”

     

    “They really make me laugh and the follow me around. Sometimes I break a little ‘biccie’ – a digestive biscuit – in the same way the Queen broke it into little pieces, and give it to them and tell them to remember their boss.”

     

    Of the Duke and Duchess of Sussex: “I have been judged all my life, and I have no judgment on the Sussexes.”

     

    “It must be hard for Meghan and can I relate to her. I believe she is modern and fabulous. She was famous before. She is great. Why can’t Meghan be great? Why can’t she be celebrated? I have been in Meghan’s shoes, and I still am. There’s always a twist of negativity and it just gets so sad and tiring… I abhor bullying and I feel desperately sorry for the pain they must be going through.”

     

    “I believe very strongly that I have absolutely no judgment on any other person’s life, and I look at how much she [Meghan] loves him [Harry] and loves the children and gives him a love that he’s never had before. That’s how I look at it… The most important thing is, Diana would be so very proud of Archie and Lili. She would have adored every moment of it.”


    Of King Charles III: “It’s incredible what he’s done for the environment. He was a trailblazer and many years ago, everybody said: ‘What’s he talking about?’ But he’s right. I’m a great believer and supporter of him, as I am of the Queen Consort.”

     

    Of herself and her life: “I have been in the gutter.”

     

    “I’m a brilliant mother. The best mother.”

     

    “I don’t believe that any single person has the right to judge another person. I’m not in a position myself to make any judgments.”

     

    “I’m very steadfast and stoic… I won’t let anyone down. I’m very loyal.”

     

    Being rather wishy-washy: “The most important thing is that the sun will come up tomorrow and the day will move on.”

     

    Of food, family and dining: “As long as it is hot, wet and goes down the right way, it’s fine with me.”

     

    “With every smell, I smell food. With every sight, I see food. I can almost hear food. I want to spade the whole lot through my mouth at Mach 2. Basta!”

     

    “We all sit round the table and eat together. Andrew and I believe in total parent unity. We’re best friends.”

     

    On the coronation of King Charles III: “Well I’ve decided the best thing about British around a coronation – although I’ve never been to one – I think we should, I should set up a tea room at the bottom of the drive with bunting and cakes.”

     

    “Never presume, never assume. I don’t know. But I’ll be there at the end of the drive with a cup of tea if I’m not there.”

     

    Of wanting to be a television star: “I would quite like to go on Dancing With The Stars. I would like somebody to teach me to tango. I do know the show and my children would be so proud of me.”

     

    On Americans: “I divorced, went to America, wrote a book, went on Oprah and did 12 years as the longest running spokesperson of Weight Watchers. I looked to America to support me and to help me and I really can’t thank the American people enough for what they gave me and what they did for me.”

     

    Of when she decided she wanted to bag a royal: “I met [Prince Andrew] when I was 12, and I said: ‘I’m going to marry him.’”

     

    Of marriage, divorce and work: “I left my marriage knowing I’d have to work. I have.”

     

    “I didn’t want a divorce, but had to because of circumstance.”

     

    “I wish we’d never got divorced. He and I both wish we’d never divorced, but we did. I wish I could go back and be the bride again, but I can’t.”

     

    Of her many, many mistakes: “I felt that I ostracised myself by my behaviour, by the past, by living with all the regrets of my mistakes, that I sort of wore a hair shirt and beat myself up most of the day thinking and regretting why did I make such a mistake. Why have I made so many mistakes?”

     

    “You look at the devil in the face, which you do. Then you forgive, and you say: ‘OK, I’ve made almost a mistake that will never be forgotten,’ and forgive.”

     

    “I think the obstacles are the way, as opposed to in the way. I feel very strongly that I completely and utterly own my very naïve self and made endless different wrong decisions, whatever they may be, but in the end, it’s got me to today as an author. I’m a person in my own right, I’m Sarah.”

     

    “I was so out of control with desperation… I was looking for quick fixes in the places I wouldn’t normally look… I’ve been a huge overtrusting, idiotic, stupid woman that went to look for the perfect situation, and that’s all I can say really.”

     

    “I’ve done the work to get to myself. I’ve done masses of mental therapy. I probably reached to the wrong places and the wrong people and made, as you call it, mistakes. I don’t call them mistakes. I call them enormous learning curves.”

     

  • Monster of the Moment – John Goodier (AKA ‘Claire Goodier’)

    Monster of the Moment – John Goodier (AKA ‘Claire Goodier’)

    Trans paedophile turned deviant dog abuser Claire Goodier deservedly jailed for having group sex with an Alsatian whilst high on cocaine; the case echoes that of the 2017 conviction of the perverted pensioner Carol Bowditch – a woman with a ‘passion’ for St Bernards

    In April 2017, The Steeple Times featured the story of the much deserved “humiliation” of a perverted pensioner from Evedon, Lincolnshire named Carol Bowditch after she was caught having penetrative vaginal sex with a St Bernard, a black Labrador and an Alsatian.

     

    In September 2019, we followed up with the story of another dog rapist, the exotically monikered Hansel Marion DeBartolo III (AKA ‘Sexy Vegan’), after this self-professed “vegan messiah” followed up an appearance on the Dr Phil show with an online video in which he disgustingly “performed an act of bestiality” on a pit bull terrier. His shocked mother unsurprsingly responded: “[He’s] a sociopathic piece of crap.”

     

    Now, this morning, with the MailOnline reporting on the case of a 60-year-old “paedophile who identifies as female” being jailed for 20 months for having group sex in Bournemouth with an Alsatian we can complete what quite frankly is one of the twisted trios humanity must ever have come across.

     

    Reported on by a journalist named Dan Sales for the paper, the repugnantly revolting actions of John Goodier – whom “was listed under a male name but with a note added to be addressed in the hearing as Claire” – were set out before Chester Crown Court at sentencing yesterday before the “sobbing” sodomite was sent down.

     

    Convicted of possessing indecent images of children in 2006 and 2009, this serial offender had previously been “astonishingly lucky” to avoid jail in the past according to Judge Steven Everett, but was yesterday condemned as “despicable, disgusting and depraved.”

     

    In July 2019, according to prosecutor Paulinus Barnes, a routine check by police on Goodier’s home due to her being on the sex offenders’ register for life, resulted in the discovered of a laptop containing 31 indecent images of sex acts with an Alsatian breed of dog.

     

    Of these, Mr Barnes remarked:

     

    “She admitted possession of the images. She said she had fantasised about it for a number of years and after talking about it with people in Northwich, was put in touch with others in Bournemouth. She travelled down there in December 2018 and took part in the sex act with other people and the Alsatian dog.”

     

    Summing up and not accepting Goodier’s laughable defence that she was “frank and honest” and working towards an “improvement in her attitude and approach,” Judge Everett slammed this clearly insane individual’s vile actions. Of her, he concluded:

     

    “You are a long, long way from changing your life. You deceitfully took part in a cocaine-fuelled incident with other persons.”

     

    “Since the terrible offence took place you kept the images unashamedly for your own sexual gratification.”

     

    “In the middle of all this, you failed to comply with the terms of an order, which some might say is a minor breach, but it’s not for the first time.”

     

    “Your record is appalling and it could be said you were astonishingly lucky not to go to prison previously. A message must go out that if you commit such disgusting behaviour then you must go to prison.”

     

    Though a clearly anything but remorseful Goodier will now serve 20 months, be subject to a 10-year Sexual Harm Prevention Order and yet again be forced to sign the Sex Offenders’ Register, no mention was made of the fate of the poor, buggered Alsatian or what had been done about the equally sadistic others that took part in the Bournemouth incident.

     

    John Goodier dog abuser
    According to the ‘MailOnline’: “A Sexual Harm Prevention Order is under [Goodier’s] new name, but it is not clear whether she will serve time in [a] men’s or [a] women’s prison.” Frankly, however, what truly matters is that this repugnant specimen is kept well away from the guard dogs of any prison she is held in.
    Carol Bowditch dog abuser
    On conviction for having penetrative vaginal and oral sex with a St Bernard, a black Labrador and an Alsatian in April 2017, when she was surprisingly spared jail, Carol Bowditch ludicrously declared: “I was unaware it was illegal.” She was given a community order with 12 months supervision and a 16-week night-time curfew” by Judge Michael Heath. Of her, he quite rationally concluded: “I am told that you have received public humiliation as a result of the publicity that this case has attracted. That does not surprise me.”
    Hansel Marion DeBartolo III Sexy Vegan Dr Phil dog abuser
    Californian freak with a desire to be president Hansel Marion DeBartolo III (AKA ‘Sexy Vegan’) is known for appearing on the ‘Dr Phil’ show. He’s also known for comparing himself to an “exotic Lamborghini SV” and filming himself raping dogs. He once declared: “Do what you do as long as you are not harming anyone, animals and insects too,” but clearly did not apply such a sentiment to his own sexual antics. He should be kept away from zoos and pet shops forever.
    In July 2018, Isaac Butterfield told his 1.75 million followers on YouTube that he thought ‘Sexy Vegan’ was “skinny, loud and obnoxious.” He went on to add of this self-declared “vegan messiah”: “Please don’t f**king procreate ever!” We join the countless millions echoing these sentiments and suggest instead that Hansel Marion DeBartolo III be locked up for the safety of himself (and innocent animals everywhere).
  • Deluded & Deviant – ‘Farting Fergie’ & ‘Randy Andy’

    Deluded & Deviant – ‘Farting Fergie’ & ‘Randy Andy’

    For once Dan Wootton got it right in condemning ‘Randy Andy’ and ‘Farting Fergie’ as “deluded… self-centred… gauche… disgraced public figures”

    Yesterday afternoon in the MailOnline, for once, the usually “deeply unpleasant” Dan Wootton actually had his finger on the pulse.

     

    In an opinion piece titled: “If Fergie’s fairy-tale romance with Andrew endures it’s because they are two of the most deluded and self-centred individuals on the planet (with apologies to Meghan),” Wootton raged of deluded deviant Prince Andrew and his loopy live-in ex-wife Sarah, Duchess of York: “You are both disgraced public figures who have ended up back in each other’s lives by necessity and little else.”

     

    Continuing and though somewhat generously describing ‘Farting Fergie’ as “more naïve than nasty; more silly than snide,” Wootton concluded:

     

    “If Fergie REALLY loves Prince Andrew, she only has two choices.

     

    “Insist he flies to New York immediately and cooperates with the FBI, come what may.”

     

    “Or pack him off to a tiny cottage where he costs the Royal Family and taxpayers nothing and where he can quietly conduct charity work out of the public gaze without embarrassing his poor mother further.”

     

    “But, once again, this gauche pair will put maintaining their own extravagant lifestyles ahead of anything else. And live unhappily ever after in disgrace.”

     

    Wootton’s words are spot on, but he missed a key detail. Why didn’t he reference the ongoing question we all need an answer to. That question? Did Sarah, Duchess of York ever repay the money she so shamelessly borrowed from the since croaked paedophile Jeffrey Epstein?

     

    Pictured top – Sarah, Duchess of York looking like a fool for a segment on her joke of a YouTube channel, ‘Fergie & Friends’ (left) and her equally cringeworthy ex-husband Prince Andrew mocked up as Jimmy Savile (right).

     

    Sharing his ‘MailOnline’ article on Twitter, Dan Wootton declared: “I’m sorry, Fergie, your relationship with disgraced Prince Andrew is a ‘fairytale’ in the same way Meghan Markle is a selfless soul who puts others first and always tells the truth.”
    Sarah Duchess of York Ghislaine Maxwell
    Sarah, Duchess of York pictured with the since incarcerated Ghislaine Maxwell at an opening party at Asprey in 2003. It remains unknown as to whether ‘Fergie’ ever repaid a loan from the mucky madam’s now croaked sidekick and lover Jeffrey Epstein.
    Duke of York Duchess of York Peter Nygard
    The Queen’s most embarrassing son and his wacky wastrel ex-wife took their children with them when they went to stay on Peter Nygård’s Caribbean island in 2000. Nygård has since been charged with multiple sexual offences against at least 57 individuals in both the United States of America and Canada and accused by two of his own sons of “directing a known sex worker to rape them.”
    Duke of York Duchess of York Stuart Hall Jeffrey Epstein Harvey Weinstein
    The royal rotters have also been known to associate with other since convicted sex offenders – amongst them (from left to right) disgraced television Stuart Hall, disgraced movie mogul Harvey Weinstein and disgraced financier Harvey Weinstein.
    Sarah Duchess of York John Bryan toe sucking
    On Thursday 20th August 1992, the ‘Daily Mirror’ shared what they called “the pictures they didn’t want you to see.” In them, a topless Duchess of York was shown having her toes sucked in the South of France by a Texan millionaire named John Bryan. Of the incident, the ‘Mirror’ later reported: “Royal writer Richard Kay claimed in the ‘Daily Mail’ that he received a message via pager from Princess Diana the night before the photos hit the newspaper stands. Diana’s message was simple: ‘The redhead’s in trouble.’”
    Prince Andrew Pizza Express
    Fergie’s’ non-sweating ex-husband Prince Andrew was widely mocked after claiming to distinctly remember a visit to Pizza Express in Woking on the day he allegedly had sex with the then teenage Virginia Roberts, now Giuffre, in 2001. During his juggernaut crashworthy interview with Emily Maitlis in November 2019, he remarked: “I was with the children and I’d taken Beatrice to a Pizza Express in Woking for a party at I suppose four or five in the afternoon. And then because the duchess [Sarah Ferguson] was away, we have a simple rule in the family that when one is away the other is there.” Whether he actually attended has since been disputed and whether he actually consumed pizza remains still unknown.
  • Moneybags Madeley’s £500k Pay Day

    Moneybags Madeley’s £500k Pay Day

    Alleged shoplifter turned moneybags man Richard Madeley can certainly now afford to actually pay for Krug champagne after landing a £500k pay day with ITV

    Tellybox twerp Richard Madeley well and truly hit the jackpot this morning with revelations that he’s getting £200,000 to appear on ITV1’s I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here! this month as well as an annual salary of £300,000 to present the same channel’s Good Morning Britain going forward from December.

     

    First reported by the MailOnline’s Eve Buckland, news that motormouthed Madeley will replace Piers Morgan on Good Morning Britain “alongside a revolving team of guest presenters” was immediately condemned on social media. According to Buckland, Judy Finnigan’s annoying husband “is expected to host for two or three days a week.”

     

    Assessing why the former This Morning co-host – whose cringeworthy car crash Alan Partridge-esque moments we feature below – decided to take on the role, a source commented:

     

    “[Richard had a] heart to heart [with Judy]… [He] has always maintained he would never do GMB full-time, as he loves his life as it is.”

     

    “But as the weeks have gone by, and he’s proven a constant hit with viewers, he’s really got into his stride and has been enjoying it more and more. He polls really well with fans and ratings have steadily been on the rise again over the past six months.”

     

    “After a couple of meetings with ITV bosses, he was offered a full-time contract. And after consulting with his family, especially wife Judy, he decided ‘sod it’ – and to go for it.”

     

    On Twitter, one user, Matthew Payne, declared of the channel’s decision: “Money for old rope. A sad, biased, ill-informed prat” whilst another, Rob McGuire, added: “[He’s just] a tactless, ignorant, rich, Tory clown.” Going further, quite rightly, John Slater concluded: “The bottom of the barrel has well and truly been scraped.”

     

    ‘Moneybags Madeley’ – whose washed-up wastrel wife is best known for necking rather than sipping her booze and flashing her tits at awards ceremonies – must be doing cartwheels. He’ll no longer have to worry about being accused of shoplifting champagne when heading down the booze aisle at Waitrose. The Krug’s most definitely now on him.

     

    Richard Madeley Alan Partridge
    ‘Moneybags Madeley’ – as he will henceforth also be known – is often compared to the inept comedy character broadcaster Alan Partridge. They not only look alike, but also are equally incompetent and tactless. Twitter users regularly condemn Romford, Essex born Madeley as “daft” and as a “pompous prat.”
    Richard Madeley Ali G
    ‘Moneybags Madeley’ once dressed up as Ali G to present ‘This Morning.’ It was later voted “one of the worst moments in television history.”
    Ghislaine Maxwell Richard Madeley
    In April this year, we revealed that the one-time classmate of ‘Spreadsheet Phil,’ the former Tory chancellor Philip Hammond, Madeley was being followed by Ghislaine Maxwell’s PR team on Twitter and that he’d written two columns in the ‘Daily Express’ in which he expressed “empathy” for the currently incarcerated alleged mucky madam.

    ‘Moneybags’ Madeley’s Finest Moments

    On his son’s wedding

    “There’s been so much angst about it… It’s been so choppy, but, yes, he got married and now we’ve got a daughter-in-law.”

     

    Of his daughter

    “Sorry Chloe, but you were an accident and you know it!”

     

    In conversation with President Clinton

    “I know what it’s like to be wronged by the press. I was once accused of shoplifting. Unlike you though, I knew I was innocent.”

     

    Of women

    “I’ve never met a single woman who’s happy with the way she looks, except Jordan, although I’ve never met her.”

     

    Of alleged mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell

    “The sharks are circling; they smell blood in the water… Cynics would say the [FBI] agency is playing a long game, seeking to sway the minds of jurors in advance of Maxwell’s trial next year… Innocent until proven guilty? That honourable credo is in shreds.”

     

    “Firstly, consider the conditions under which Ms Maxwell is being held. They are truly grim… It would take a heart of stone not to feel empathy for another human being suffering what amounts to mental torture. To coin a phrase: you wouldn’t treat a dog like that.”

     

    “But it’s not sadism, or premature punishment ahead of a verdict. No; there’s calculated purpose behind this pitiless regime. But, here’s another prediction… it will. They’re trying to break her.”

     

    On elephants

    “So, are you telling me elephants are not born evil?”

     

    To a man crying after paramedics saved his life

    “Stop crying! This is supposed to make you happy! Anyway, after the break, the biggest dog in the UK. And he really is big. Don’t miss it!”

     

    Showing sympathy for people who died in quicksand in Morecambe Bay

    “Yes, what an awful way to die.”

     

    In Nostradamus-like fashion on coronavirus and lockdowns

    “We are being duped… [They are trying to] put the fear of God into the public. A great reckoning is coming.”

     

    “There’s no point in running away and hiding from the virus.”

     

    “We must learn to live with coronavirus.”

     

    “If I had a bell, I would ring it… Only 59 people who have been double vaccinated and without any other serious underlying health problems, died from COVID, out of 50,000 deaths in England, this year.”

     

    “I have to say that the majority of people are surprisingly forgiving [to government representative Steve Barclay], and are actually saying that they understand that the reason for some of the mistakes wasn’t malpractice but scientific ignorance – we didn’t know enough… But on the whole, you seem to be getting away with it – as far as our viewers are concerned.”

     

    Of old women skipping

    “There’s not many better things than seeing an older woman skipping.”

     

    Of wanting to be black

    “I hope when I’m reincarnated I come back black because you age better.”

     

    To Keira Knightley

    “Can we get some make up please, get Keira looking like a crack whore, she’d make a good crack whore.”

     

    Of an autistic teenager

    “The thing with Daniel [Wakeford, a ‘star’ on Channel 4’s ‘Undateables] is, he has autism but is very intelligent and as we can see extremely talented. Has Daniel always been autistic?”

     

    To a caller

    “I understand you have a little lad of 12. Is it a boy or a girl?”

     

    Richard-Madeley-Ched-Evans-Judy-Finnigan
    Judy Finnigan’s decision to defend footballer Ched Evans – jailed for 5 years in 2012 for allegedly raping a 19-year-old – on ‘Loose Women’ in October 2014 shocked the nation. Responding at the time, Katie Russell, of Rape Crisis England and Wales remarked: “Judy Finnegan’s comments are really unfortunate and could potentially cause some hurt and distress to the many survivors of sexual violence who will inevitably have been watching ‘Loose Women’ and who will read and hear her views reported.”
    Judy Finnigan Richard Madeley boozingpng
    ‘Moneybags’ Madeley and Finnigan are often pictured out boozing. Often, ‘Mummy Finnigan’ looks a little beyond pissed.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rcx3FUarNiI&feature=emb_logo
    Whilst ‘Dorian Gray-esque’ Richard Madeley is best known for helping himself to champagne in supermarkets, his wife Judy Finnigan will be forever remembered for flashing at an awards ceremony in 2000.
  • Missing Maddie & Another Crackpot Clairvoyant

    Missing Maddie & Another Crackpot Clairvoyant

    Crackpot clairvoyant Michael Schneider claims he’s found the location of Madeleine McCann’s body; he remarkably did so with Google Maps, his fingers and the help of God (according to the ‘Mirror’)

    When the British government is in a mess – the current case being whether the 21st June ‘unlockdown’ will actually occur due to the ever-increasing prevalence of the Indian variant of coronavirus – they encourage the reeling out of another senseless story about ‘disappeared’ Madeleine McCann.

     

    After sharing a “nothing new” story in late May and an irrelevant “we won’t be getting a verdict until the end of the year” in the legal battle between the child’s parents and Goncalo Amaral last week, today the Mirror returned to the fray with an utterly preposterous “exclusive.”

     

    Sharing suggestions from a clairvoyant – yes, you read it correct, a crackpot clairvoyant – named Michael Schneider, the paper reported that the BKA, “Germany’s equivalent of the FBI,” are “appropriately incorporating” his belief that ‘Missing Maddie’ is “buried in a forest just six miles where she vanished… into their work.”

     

    Schneider argues he “does not give out such information lightly,” yet then laughably explained: “I look at a photo of the missing person and ask myself upwards towards God whether this living being is alive or dead.”

     

    Continuing, this clearly off-his-merry-rocker 50-year-old fruitcake then added:

     

    “After that I take an atlas or a road map and look at large areas superficially. Afterwards at Google Maps and Earth. Then I let my fingers and my eyes circle over these maps until they stop on a spot and mark it.”

     

    Elsewhere, the MailOnline shared their thoughts on the development and declared:

     

    “He isn’t the first clairvoyant to claim supernatural powers have helped him pinpoint Madeleine’s location. Nine years ago, detectives studied 100 logs from psychics that were previously ignored and termed ‘a waste of resources.’”

     

    “And in 2017, the family were hit by a cruel hoax after Susan Kelly demanded payment from the family as she claimed to know ‘the truth’ about Madeleine’s whereabouts.”

     

    Responding to Schneider’s plainly nothing but a publicity prank prattling, the frankly utterly useless German prosecutor Hans Christian Wolters witlessly warbled:

     

    “Several psychics have responded to our call for help in the past year and offered assistance. In some cases, we also received ­concrete tips. We do not ignore them, but we are cautious.”

     

    On Twitter, members of the public called out this claptrap for what it truly is. One user named Eli remarked: “There’s a sucker born every minute” whilst another concluded: “If you wish to know where Madeleine McCann is… ask Kate and Gerry.”

     

    Going further and echoing our previous sentiments about the total misallocation of £13.5 million to a case that plainly isn’t going to get solved whilst neglecting to support the families of other missing people, one David Osland shared an image of another child who went missing and quite rightly asked: “Any reason this poor boy didn’t get the same priority as Madeleine McCann?”

     

    Pictured top: Michael Schneider (left) and Gerry McCann with an image of his ‘missing’ daughter, Madeleine McCann – a child supposedly ‘taken’ on the 3rd May 2007 after she and her siblings were left alone in a holiday apartment in Praia da Luz.

     

     

    Living it Large – Gerry MccCann enjoying a round of golf (left); Kate McCann at Downing Street, London hobnobbing with Missing People CEO Martin Houghton-Brown, the Duchess of Gloucester and the then Home Secretary Theresa May on 23rd May 2012 (right).
    Living it Large – Gerry MccCann enjoying a round of golf (left); Kate McCann at Downing Street, London hobnobbing with Missing People CEO Martin Houghton-Brown, the Duchess of Gloucester and the then Home Secretary Theresa May on 23rd May 2012 (right).
    Michael Schneider Madeleine McCann forest
    The ‘MailOnline’ shared that the location former TV reporter turned clairvoyant Michael Schneider believes where Madeleine McCann’s body is buried is just six miles from where she ‘vanished’ in Praia da Luz, Portugal in May 2007. They added: “[He] has told police officers the ‘exact co-ordinates’ of the spot he believes the youngster’s body can be found in a fresh blow to the McCann family… His clairvoyance technique includes looking at photographs of a missing person and asking God ‘whether this living being is alive or dead,’ before turning to atlases and Google Maps until they ‘stop on a spot.’”

    Twitter reactions to Michael Schneider’s batshit bonkers claims…

    Madeleine McCann crackpot clairvoyant tweet 1
    Madeleine McCann clairvoyant tweet 2
    Madeleine McCann clairvoyant tweet 3
    Madeleine McCann clairvoyant tweet 4
    Madeleine McCann clairvoyant tweet 5
  • Down The Drain McCann

    Down The Drain McCann

    More money goes down the drain in the Madeleine McCann case on top of the £13.5 million of British taxpayer wonga chucked away on absolutely no results

    This morning – continuing the pointless pattern of the Mirror and MailOnline to “note nothing new” in the case of ‘disappeared’ Madeleine McCann we highlighted last week – The Sun shared an “exclusive” about the investigation that frankly wasn’t worthy of a single column inch.

     

    After beginning with the bashfully bold headline “Madeleine McCann’s parents to find out this year if they’ve won legal battle against ex-cop” Goncalo Amaral – whom currently is owed a “six-figure sum” believed to be circa £750,000 by Gerry and Kate McCann after he beat them in court in February 2017 – the paper then concluded without an actual “when” and the non-news that “the judges will now give a verdict by the end of the year.”

     

    Of this diatribe of drivel, one could say: “Thanks for that,” but more realistically anyone rational would ask of The Sun instead: “Couldn’t you have asked your contributor to instead go looking for a missing person where there is a genuine chance of that person actually being found?”

     

    Meanwhile, on Sunday, the Mirror – a red-top reliable for prattling on about “non-news” about a situation that could have been avoided perhaps if two doctors hadn’t left their toddlers unattended so they could live it up in a restaurant with their mates – shared that the prosecution team that named Christian Brueckner (AKA ‘Christian B’) exactly one year ago just as the British government began their ‘coronavirus distraction technique,’ have actually not spoken to Gerry and Kate McCann once during the ensuing period.

     

    Asked if they had genuinely made any progress in the case, prosecutor Hans Christian Wolters “angrily hit back at critics” and illustrated the weakness of his work in declaring: “I don’t care who believes what… We are missing important important information. We want no stone unturned. Whether there will be an indictment in the end, I cannot foresee at the moment.”

     

    The Mirror concluded: “Brueckner, serving seven years for raping a 72-year-old woman in Praia, has not been interviewed,” whilst elsewhere the Daily Record added Wolters pathetically offered: “Our appeal for witnesses still stands.” We respond: “Where on earth do you think these people are given the millions already offered in rewards that have never been claimed?”

     

    Clearly, on top of the £13.5 million of British taxpayer money wasted on this case already, that’s another chunk of change down the drain whilst other families of missing people shamefully get little to no help at all. Enough is enough; it is time to close down the investigation into ‘missing’ Madeleine McCann.

     

    Paedophile Sir Clement Freud, Gerry and Kate McCann running
    Kate McCann – a woman who went running, played tennis and dined on chicken and mushroom risotto and egg and watercress salads washed down with strawberry vodka with the paedophile Sir Clement Freud in the days after her ‘disappeared’ – has a clear touch of the former Meghan Markle about her. Like ‘MeGain,’ whom banged on that “not many people have asked if I’m OK,” Mrs McCann said in 2011: “Officers walked past us as if we weren’t there. Nobody asked how we were doing, whether we were okay. Our child had been stolen and I felt as if I didn’t exist.”
    Elsewhere on social media this weekend, the matter of Kate McCann being photographed with bruises on her wrists in the days after her daughter disappeared was again discussed. This tweet from 2018 was once again referenced.
    Down The Drain McCann 2021 – Millions wasted in McCann case – More money goes down the drain in the Madeleine McCann case on top of the £13.5 million of British taxpayer wonga chucked away on absolutely no results.
    Christian Brueckner (AKA ‘Christian B’, pictured left with his ex-girlfriend Naskcije Miftari) was brought to public attention just as the British government began to suffer “very bad news days” at the beginning of the coronavirus pandemic last year. The narrative of him being the evil, paedophile suited Boris Johnson’s government a treat as it helped shift the headlines – for a period – away from their appalling handling of initial lockdowns. This weekend, equally, Johnson has managed to do something similar by marrying his latest ‘baby mama’ Carrie Symonds and in doing so, cynics quite correctly argue that he has used the ‘distraction technique’ to get his bad week courtesy of Dominic Cummings off the front pages. Unsurprisingly, social media manipulated imagery from the wedding by using images such as those pictured (centre and right).
    In December 2017, when £11 million of British taxpayers’ money had been spent towards the search for ‘missing’ Madeleine McCann, 86% of viewers of ITV1’s ‘Loose Women’ said the public purse should cease to fund the investigation. Now, in May 2021, with that sum at £13.5 million (aside from the millions in private money also), it is time to allocate resources to the search for missing people who actually can be found, we would suggest.
  • Tatler Tells Fake Tales

    Tatler Tells Fake Tales

    ‘Tatler’ magazine called out for suggesting a Chelsea restaurant that closed down in August 2016 as a “hot spot” post ‘Lockdown 3.0’ ending in May 2021

    A “tattler” is an “observer or spectator… a gossip who tells tales,” whilst ‘THE’ Tatler is defined by the Oxford Learners’ Dictionary as “a British magazine, published once a month and containing articles about upper-class and upper-middle-class social events, fashion and the arts.”

     

    Given the Condé Nast lifestyle publication’s staff – amongst them previously the current editor of the Daily Mail, Geordie Greig, and the ex-editor of Vanity Fair and The New Yorker, Tina Brown CBE – have variously included many Oxbridge alumni, one would assume they’d be a little better at fact checking than the notoriously sloppy seconds employed by the MailOnline (which is rated 1 out of 5 by the Microsoft Edge browser given its propensity to share fake news), but instead a recent edition of the monthly society bible featured a complete balls-up.

     

    In an article titled: “13 Chelsea restaurant stalwarts to head to when we can eat indoors too,” an unnamed contributor banged on about where its ritzy readers could head to post the end of ‘Lockdown 3.0’ and lauded one particular Sydney Street, SW3 restaurant as:

     

    “[Brasserie Gustave at 4 Sydney Street, London, SW3 6PP is] located at the exact point where South Ken meets Chelsea (and on a site that has seen more restaurants than Ramires has had yellow cards), this French bistro is a keeper. If the art-deco posters look a bit hackneyed, not to say banal, the food is anything but. It’s fresh and lively, classic French dishes prepared with punctilious attention to detail. Confit de canard is superb and you won’t find a better plate of kidneys in London. Great wines too, managed with gusto by experienced sommelier Richard Weiss.”

     

    Whilst of their thirteen selections, the loathed by Dan Wootton magazine prattled: “We’ve eaten our way around Chelsea’s top restaurants… We’ve got you covered,” a comment on OpenTable from as long ago 22nd August 2016 reads: “I made a reservation and got there and the restaurant was closed.” Plainly, anyone with half a brain would have realised five years ago that Brasserie Gustave turned out actually to be anything but “a keeper.”

     

    In the time since, Tatler’s editorial team also missed their very own one-time contributor Giles Coren’s visit to 4 Sydney Street on 15th July 2017. At that time, he lauded “pan-Asian” Zheng Chelsea as “the sort of places foodies go in quest of the new and wonderful.”

     

    Whatever next for the society go-to bible? An-inhouse position for our least favourite fake news PR peddler Ivy Holt? Next!

     

    Pictured top: 4 Sydney Street has been various restaurants over the years including Carpaccio, Sette, Marco Pierre White’s Sydney Street Grill, Brasserie Gustave and most recently Zheng Chelsea.

     

    Tatler Tells Fake Tales 2021 – Tatler lauds Chelsea restaurant Brasserie Gustave, 4 Sydney Street, SW3 which closed in August 2016 in May 2021 – ‘Tatler’ magazine called out for suggesting a Chelsea restaurant that closed down in 2016 as a “hot spot” post ‘Lockdown 3.0’ ending in 2021.
    The magazine’s May 2020 feature on Brasserie Gustave – a restaurant that closed in August 2016.
    Tatler Tells Fake Tales 2021 – Tatler lauds Chelsea restaurant Brasserie Gustave, 4 Sydney Street, SW3 which closed in August 2016 in May 2021 – ‘Tatler’ magazine called out for suggesting a Chelsea restaurant that closed down in 2016 as a “hot spot” post ‘Lockdown 3.0’ ending in 2021.
    In August 2016, an OpenTable user commented: “I made a reservation for [Brasserie Gustave] on Open Table and got there and the restaurant was closed.”
    Tatler Tells Fake Tales 2021 – Tatler lauds Chelsea restaurant Brasserie Gustave, 4 Sydney Street, SW3 which closed in August 2016 in May 2021 – ‘Tatler’ magazine called out for suggesting a Chelsea restaurant that closed down in 2016 as a “hot spot” post ‘Lockdown 3.0’ ending in 2021.
    The front elevation of Zheng Chelsea, 4 Sydney Street, Chelsea, London, SW3 6PP.
    Tatler Tells Fake Tales 2021 – Tatler lauds Chelsea restaurant Brasserie Gustave, 4 Sydney Street, SW3 which closed in August 2016 in May 2021 – ‘Tatler’ magazine called out for suggesting a Chelsea restaurant that closed down in 2016 as a “hot spot” post ‘Lockdown 3.0’ ending in 2021.
    The interior of the restaurant as it used to be during the era that Brasserie Gustave (left) occupied the site and as it has been since circa 2016 as “pan-Asian” Zheng Chelsea (right). Of food there, in July 2017, Giles Coren remarked: “Food this good and this unusual would normally never be found in Chelsea… Chelsea is not absolutely the last place in the entire world that I would go looking for brilliant authentic Malaysian cooking, but it comes close. What with the well-upholstered complacency of the locals, the lack of any significant oriental population, the high throughput of tourists and idle shoppers in need of plasticky chain food, the sky-high rents and concomitant historical lack of any decent restaurants here at all, Chelsea is perhaps the second last place in the known universe that I would go in expectation of fiery, original, challenging but entirely successful Straits Chinese cuisine.”
    Tatler Tells Fake Tales 2021 – Tatler lauds Chelsea restaurant Brasserie Gustave, 4 Sydney Street, SW3 which closed in August 2016 in May 2021 – ‘Tatler’ magazine called out for suggesting a Chelsea restaurant that closed down in 2016 as a “hot spot” post ‘Lockdown 3.0’ ending in 2021.
    The society go-to title was previously accused of a “swathe of inaccuracies and false misrepresentations” in May 2020 by Kensington Palace after it published an article about one-time friend of its current editor, Richard Dennen (pictured together right), the Duchess of Cambridge titled “Catherine the Great.”

  • Note Nothing New McCann

    Note Nothing New McCann

    As the ‘Mirror’ publish yet another “nothing new” story about ‘missing’ Madeleine McCann, Matthew Steeples suggests: “Why not instead allocate some coverage to other missing people?”

    In July last year, the MailOnline ran a ludicrous story suggesting that “a new witness has come forward to claim that Madeleine McCann is alive and living with a German family on the Algarve.” They did not name this supposedly beady eyed individual, but suggested “she saw the by-now teenager in a supermarket just 40 miles from where she disappeared speaking German.”

     

    Unsurprisingly like most ‘leads’ in this curious case, this far-fetched suggestion never resulted in any further developments and now, this morning, it’s been the turn of the Mirror to muddy the waters yet again.

     

    Note Nothing New McCann 2021 – Non-news about Madeleine McCann – As the ‘Mirror’ publish yet another “nothing new” story about ‘missing’ Madeleine McCann, Matthew Steeples suggests: “Why not instead allocate some coverage to some other missing people?”
    Note Nothing New McCann 2021 – Gerry and Kate McCann pictured out running in the days after the ‘disappearance’ of their daughter. Soon thereafter, claiming the Portuguese police were “setting them up,” the couple fled back to Britain.

    Probably prompted by those seeking to get further funds to top up the fast approaching £13 million of public money wasted on a case caused by a couple who left their three young children unattended whilst living it up at a restaurant, the Mirror reported: “Kate and Gerry McCann still hope [their daughter] will be found alive, 14 years after she vanished on holiday in Portugal in 2007, days before her fourth birthday.”

     

    Aside from banging on about a note left in a staff message book at the resort, the paper shared that Mr and Mrs McCann have recently declared on Facebook: “We love you and we’re waiting for you and we’re never going to give up.”

     

    This morning, I counter: “Why don’t the Mirror and MailOnline and others stop printing such drivel and why don’t they instead help the thousands of other families of missing people who get little to no assistance instead?”

     

    Missing Madeleine – Questions STILL without Answers

    Many questions about what happened on the evening of the disappearance of Madeleine McCann remain. Some that have been highlighted by the press and discussed online include:

     

    • Why did Kate McCann refuse to answer 48 questions put to her by the Portuguese police?

     

    • Why were certain records of phone calls on the evening of the disappearance “whoosh-clunked” from the memories of the phones of Mr and Mrs McCann and the ‘Tapas 7’?

     

    • Why did a British sniffer dog sense the smell of a corpse in a cupboard in the apartment from which Madeleine McCann disappeared?

     

    • Why did a sniffer dog also supposedly sense the smell of a corpse in a vehicle hired by the couple a month after the disappearance of their daughter?

     

     

     

    Note Nothing New McCann 2021 – Non-news about Madeleine McCann – As the ‘Mirror’ publish yet another “nothing new” story about ‘missing’ Madeleine McCann, Matthew Steeples suggests: “Why not instead allocate some coverage to some other missing people?”
    Martin Allen vanished without a trace in London on 5th November 1979 aged just 15. Though his brother, Kevin Allen, has kept the case in the public eye as much as he can, he gets little to no help from the Metropolitan Police. Again today, I ask: “Why isn’t money from the public purse allocated to solving this case and thousands like it and why, instead, has fast approaching £13 million been allocated to a case that has not been solved in 14 years?”
    Note Nothing New McCann 2021 – Non-news about Madeleine McCann – As the ‘Mirror’ publish yet another “nothing new” story about ‘missing’ Madeleine McCann, Matthew Steeples suggests: “Why not instead allocate some coverage to some other missing people?”
    Luke Durbin disappeared aged just 19 in Suffolk in May 2006. In spite of his mother’s tireless campaign to attempt to find her vanished son, why don’t the police devote more resources to the search for him?
    Note Nothing New McCann 2021 – Non-news about Madeleine McCann – As the ‘Mirror’ publish yet another “nothing new” story about ‘missing’ Madeleine McCann, Matthew Steeples suggests: “Why not instead allocate some coverage to some other missing people?”
    Ben Needham, then aged just 1, disappeared on the Greek island of Kos on 24th July 1991. He has been missing for over 29 year and in the time since his mother, Kerry Needham, has shockingly come under attack from supporters of the family of Madeleine McCann. Of this in October 2015, she commented: “It feels like a personal attack on me. It is deeply, deeply hurtful. I have myself had massive amounts of slanderous abuse from supporters of the McCann campaign in the past but I have never taken that personally. It’s freedom of speech. But it is getting the names of two missing children out there which is really important.”
  • Hospitality vs. Headbangers

    Hospitality vs. Headbangers

    Legal challenge to Boris Johnson’s government’s completely illogical refusal to allow indoor hospitality venues to open whilst allowing indoor retail to open to be decided on this week

    In spite of venues with outdoor space being allowed to serve customers on their terraces and in gardens, the hospitality sector in the UK will continue to lose around £200 million per day until the government allows them to serve indoors in mid-May.

     

    This week, following a perfectly sensible legal challenge by Sacha Lord, the night-time economy adviser for Greater Manchester, and Hugh Osmond, the founder of Punch Taverns, the government could be forced to bring forward the date for indoor opening for bars, pubs and restaurants.

     

    Lord and Osmond together quite sensibly argue there is no justification or scientific basis for indoor hospitality to be kept closed for five additional weeks after non-essential retailers in England were allowed to serve customers indoors from 12th April. Their call is correct and the continuation of this illogical set of double standards is doing just one thing: Dealing another body blow to an already devastated sector.

     

    Speaking on Radio 4’s Today programme this morning of their challenge to the crackpot crazy decisions of borderline bonkers’ Boris Johnson’s Tory government, Osmond remarked:

     

    “This is something of a David versus Goliath battle. We are reassured that David won in that instance.”

     

    “At the start of this pandemic there was a totally understandable assumption that hospitality venues might be responsible for the spread of infections. The vision of drunken people in crowded pubs is an easy and obvious target that people understand.”

     

    “The data [now] definitively shows that hospitality was not the major source of infections.”

     

    Elsewhere on Twitter on Friday, Lord remarked: “The government’s defence is just in… They must be concerned, they’ve put their No. 1 legals on the case, Sir James Eadie QC, the First Treasury Counsel.”

     

    Going further this morning, he added: “Thank you for all the good luck messages. It’s not necessarily today, the Judge has said: ‘The week commencing the 19th.’ Again, a real long shot, but as soon as there’s news, I’ll post it here. Enjoy the sun.”

     

    Today, all at The Steeple Times join those supporting the logic of allowing indoor hospitality venues to reopen and reopen now. Let’s get the indoor show back on the road.

     

    Pictured top: Restaurants such as Fifty Cheyne in Chelsea, London have tables that are very clearly separated from one another. As shown in this image, diners can be socially distanced in a manner perfectly reasonable. Why shouldn’t such places – which lack outdoor dining areas and thus cannot even benefit from the currently allowed outdoor opening rules – not be able to get back to business whilst small, cramped shops with little-to-no precautionary measures are allowed to trade?

     

    Hospitality vs. Headbangers 2021 – Hospitality vs. Government – Legal challenge to Boris Johnson’s government’s illogical refusal to allow indoor hospitality venues open whilst allowing indoor retail to be decided on this week.
    Hospitality vs. Headbangers – Echoing scenes from December 2020 reported on in ‘The Steeple Times,’ on Sunday the ‘MailOnline’ reported on yet another swarm of maskless, tempestuous teenagers descending on Harrods on Saturday. Sharing the article on Twitter on Monday, Hugh Osmond remarked: “It is surely clear that all-seated, licensed hospitality venues, with table service only, cannot present more of a risk than non-essential retail… Open indoor hospitality now.”
    Hospitality vs. Headbangers 2021 – Hospitality vs. Government – Legal challenge to Boris Johnson’s government’s illogical refusal to allow indoor hospitality venues open whilst allowing indoor retail to be decided on this week.
    Hospitality vs. Headbangers – Giuseppe Turi, who owns Enoteca Turi on Pimlico Road, London, SW1 with his wife Pamela, is currently just serving people on his two outside tables “after loyal customers begged him to reopen,” the ‘Daily Star’ last week reported. Speaking to the ‘Mail on Sunday,’ Mr Turi added: “It doesn’t really make financial sense with just two tables, but our customers are so desperate to come back. We are now fully booked until May 17 when we can open inside. We are very excited to connect with our regulars again, but unfortunately we’ve not been able to accommodate everybody.” The chances of this business making a profit from such activity stand in the area of “zilch-zero-nothing,” but provide proof that it is businesses that are showing initiative and not the illogical, rudderless, incompetent government of Boris Johnson.
    Hospitality vs. Headbangers 2021 – Hospitality vs. Government – Legal challenge to Boris Johnson’s government’s illogical refusal to allow indoor hospitality venues open whilst allowing indoor retail to be decided on this week.
    Hospitality vs. Headbangers – Last October, Richard Caring, owner of many of London’s best-known high-end restaurants, stuck up two dummies of Boris Johnson (in spite of having previously given over £510,000 in donations to the Conservative Party previously). At the time of the lockdown then in place, Caring raged: “Make no mistake, this is a disastrous decision, taken by people who do not understand what terrible damage they are doing to the country.”