Sunday, February 25, 2024

Public Randy vs. Private Harry

Whilst privacy obsessed yet decidedly public when for profit Prince Harry won’t be attending his grandfather’s memorial, his now disgraced uncle Prince Andrew surprisingly will be rocking up for this clearly public occasion

A mouthy mouse-not-a-man who is also a mouthy mouse-not-a-man who doesn’t sweat who eventually willingly paid £12 million to a woman he previously claimed he’d never met has announced that he is going to be making his first public appearance since making his out of court settlement on 29th March.


Pizza Express loving Prince Andrew (or ‘Randy’ his few remaining chums), a spokesman this morning confirmed, will now attend the memorial service for Prince Philip next week and of this the Daily Star’s Benedict Tetzlaff-Deas reported:


“The decision regarding Andrew’s attendance was understood to depend on whether she considered the service a family event or an official engagement… The decision regarding Andrew’s attendance was understood to depend on whether she considered the service a family event or an official engagement.”


Responding on Twitter, one user, Anthony Akhurst, commented: “Why is this moron still free and not behind prison bars?” whilst another, Northern Lass, pointedly added: “Be interesting to see who doesn’t snub him.”


A rare and more sympathetic voice, however, came in the form of one Graham Marshall. He tweeted: “We allow prisoners to attend such events. Prince Andrew should attend Duke of Edinburgh’s memorial service – have some humanity.” It would be most interesting to know what Mr Hawick would have to say if introduced to the many, many, many victims of the Duke of York’s convicted criminal besties Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell.


Meanwhile, in a very clear snub in spite of the fact he’s managing to travel to the Netherlands for another publicity stunt, the drip that is Prince Harry will not be attending his grandfather’s memorial service and nor will his ‘Modern Day Mrs Simpson’ wife, the meddling minx that was formerly known as Meghan Markle.


Pictured top running and sweating (left) and guffawing (right) – The arrogant and avaricious Duke of York is undoubtedly man who has brought the royal family into its most embarrassing moment in modern history. This shameless friend of the coffin dodging Putin apologist Bernie Ecclestone would do best to disappear and disappear forever.


Laughing stock
Though the public shame of Prince Andrew seemed to be complete, his decision to return to attend a public event is going to distract from that very event. Yet again, this self-centred twerp has put himself before his mother and siblings and though some would say he has very right to be there, if he had any sense he’d pay his respects privately instead given the sordid mess he himself created.
Yacht party
Rather than focusing on duty, both the Duke of York and his feckless thicko live-in ex-wife, the former Sarah Ferguson, have spent their lives holidaying and personal profiteering. Their associations with people of dubious backgrounds including dictators, paedophiles and crooks – many of whom they’ve holidayed with – always comes back to bite them in their not so sorry arses.
Corsica yacht holiday 2011
The age and name of a young lady the Queen’s second and favourite son cavorted with and kissed in the sea on yet another yachting jolly in Corsica in 2011 remains the subject of much discussion amongst critics of this rotten royal.
Goga Ashkenazi Ascot
Pictured at Ascot with his “very, very close friend,” the Oxford educated Kazakh businesswoman and socialite Goga Ashkenazi, the Duke of York’s connections have often been called out. Defending him, Ashkenazi told the ‘Evening Standard’ in April 2012: “I told Andrew not to worry, that he’d done nothing wrong, and that it was being blown out of proportion. Of course, he knows it was unwise to fraternise with this Epstein character, and it was silly to be photographed with his arm around Epstein’s masseuse [Virginia Roberts]. But I know Andrew as a lovely, lovely man – kind-hearted, impeccably behaved and honourable – and I’m quite sure that at the time he had no idea that she was underage or anything more than a masseuse to Epstein.” Going further of her role in selling the former marital home of her mate, Sunninghill Park, at a price grossly over-inflated to a decidedly questionable chap who’d also been her lover, without a jot of regret, she added: “It was never bought for personal use. The plan is to convert it into a charitable school for bright Kazakh children who can then try for the top British universities.” That turned out to be a bag of bilge given there is now another naff mansion standing on the site.
Matthew Steeples
Matthew Steeples
A graduate of the London School of Economics, Matthew Steeples is a writer and marketing consultant. He conceived The Steeple Times as a media arena to fill the void between the Mail Online, The Huffington Post and such organs as the New York Social Diary in 2012.


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