Never without a decent word to say, Knightsbridge’s cheeriest street sweeper is an asset to the Royal Borough of Kensington and Chelsea. Unlike the incompetent, avaricious councillors representing the area, this diligent worker never moans and he never complains. Come sun, rain, wind or snow, here is someone who takes pride in his work and here is someone who is a joy to encounter. He deserves an honour and should be commended for such.
This “sweet, matronly looking woman” killed her partner John Price, skinned him, boiled his head in a pot and served up his body parts to his children with baked potatoes and gravy in February 2000. Katherine Knight – a woman who proudly kept knives above her bed so that they “would always be handy if [she] needed them” – was the first Australian to be sentenced to life imprisonment without parole in October 2001.
A mother of four and an enthusiastic “cutter up of offal” at her local abattoir, Knight was described as having a “screw loose somewhere” by her own mother and even tried to strangle her husband on their wedding night. She unsuccessfully attempted to appeal her sentence in 2006, continues to show no signs of remorse and will rot in jail for the rest of her life.
Pearl clad pensioner ‘Brenda from Bristol’ became the Gillian Duffy of the 2017 General Election when she shared her views about politics with a BBC reporter. This 75-year old retired secretary spoke for the nation in remarking: “You’re joking? Not another one!” Oh for God’s sake, I can’t honestly… I can’t stand this. There’s too much politics going on at the moment. Why does she [Theresa May] need to do it?” and later added: “There’s hardly anybody in any of the parties that you’d put your life on the line for. We need somebody who’s got a little bit of guts to get us all going”. Brenda is entirely right: It is time that politicians stopped bothering us.
#BrendaForPM
Though never a cross word was uttered between this duo during their visits to the sadly now defunct Chelsea restaurant La Brasserie, their dislike of what they perceived as “loud music” (and other forms of noise) made them retreat to a quiet corner. Known to occasionally ‘share’ a cocktail – though firm believers in “one between two will do” – ‘The Cross Word (or Crossword) Couple’ enjoy puzzles but intensely dislike pointless chit-chat. Cross them at your peril.
A new addition to the South Kensington neighbourhood in October 2016, the Pret Prayer likes to get his mat out in front of all and sundry in Pret A Manager in Old Brompton Road, SW7. He also likes to paint and listen to his radio – on full volume, of course. He then joins the Pret Sleeper and dozes off.
Spotted early in the mornings in Pret A Manager in South Kensington, the Pret Sleeper wears loafers and an entirely black outfit. He usually purchases nothing and sits and sleeps. Occasionally he takes out a notebook and biro but only once has he been heard to speak; he choose to ring his bank manager about a transfer of the sum of £50,000. A sleeping millionaire?
A cross between Donald Trump and Liberace in terms of his liking for all things gold in interiors, Ealing based Prince John Zylinski is an eccentric property tycoon with a taste for duels and ballet dancing. (more…)
Always in a red ski jacket and always with a trolley and umbrella, The Pret Spitter is a most unpleasant vagrant. (more…)
Fly-fisherwoman Marina Gibson is an ambassador for amongst others Orvis and Indigo Ivy and describes her passion as an “unreachable itch”. (more…)
Described as a “disagreeable old trout” by her very own lawyer, farmer Margaret Wooliscroft was jailed for 28 months in December 2015 for terrorizing the residents of Brindley Ford, Stoke-on-Trent. (more…)