Friday, April 19, 2024

Audacity

Feckless Farting Fergie’s Flatulent Failings

That taker of loans from paedophiles and reader of books about farting Sarah, Duchess of York thinks she can get away with keeping £225,000 in tainted cash shows her yet again as nothing but a total berk.

Give Up Ghislaine

After her attempt to get a retrial was rightly rejected and the BBC’s ‘House of Maxwell’ reveals that she used to make ‘miaow’ noises at her late father, it is now time for the mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell to give up and to also do the right thing – name names and finally tell the truth.

Funding A Fool

That the fool Prince Andrew and his feckless live-in ex-wife were prepared to accept £1.3 million from a Turkish conman illustrates how low their moral compasses truly are.

Public Randy vs. Private Harry

Whilst privacy obsessed yet decidedly public when for profit Prince Harry won’t be attending his grandfather’s memorial, his now disgraced uncle Prince Andrew surprisingly will be rocking up for this public occasion.

Bring Back ‘Yankee Wally’ – The Duchess of Sussex’s nemesis should NOT be cancelled

Matthew Steeples slams the vindictive campaign against YouTube sensation Sadie Quinlan – known as ‘Yankee Wally’ – by the mendacious ‘Sussex Squad’ groupies led by PR peddlers Omid Scobie and Christopher Bouzy and helped along by a bashful ‘BuzzFeed News’ busybody named Ellie Hall.

Facts & Feckless Fergie

As birdbrained Sarah, Duchess of York goes on a moneymaking tour in America, this debtor to croaked paedophile Jeffrey Epstein’s tweet about her thoughts on “facts” come back to bite her in her not so regal arse.

Wally of the Week 2022 – Prince Harry

In insulting his grandmother by deciding not to attend his grandfather’s memorial, Prince Harry yet again shows himself as nothing but a degenerate drip.

The Revolving Doors Of Epstein, Maxwell & Randy Andy

Revolving doors are at work… As it is revealed mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell has a lawyer in common in Bobbi Stermheim with croaked paedo Jeffrey Epstein’s one-time quadruple killer cellmate Nicholas Tartaglione, the controversial associate and lawyer Alan Dershowitz gives up his lawsuit against Netflix whilst the aristocrat Clemmie Hambro expresses agreement with a headline of “Queen abandons sex creep Andrew!”

The Epstein-Maxwell Profiteers – Lady Victoria Hervey & Sarah, Duchess of York

As noxious nitwit Lady Victoria Hervey sticks her oar in over Ukraine, fellow Epstein-Maxwell associate and feckless fruitcake Sarah, Duchess of York heads off to the USA to try and rake in more wonga; shame on these pointless prattling profiteers.

“Wild Times” With ‘Randy Andy’

As Prince Andrew’s notches on the bedpost non-counter Michael Wynne-Parker talks of their “wild times” bedding birds, we suggest the randy royal might do better to silence his chirping chums including ‘Lady Herpes’ also.

Yankee Wally v Omid Scobie 2022

As ‘MeGain’s’ bestie Omid Scobie claims Sadie Quinlan (AKA ‘Yankee Wally’) is “on a watch list” with the “good folk at South Wales Police and Scotland Yard” and the “Fixated Threat Assessment Centre” also, the popular YouTuber reports him to the police herself.

The Truth About THAT 2001 Photo

Matthew Steeples questions the murky motives of those questioning the authenticity of THAT 2001 photo of Prince Andrew, Virginia Roberts and Ghislaine Maxwell; it is time that the personal profiteer Lady Victoria Hervey was called out for the fake that she is and it is time to remind the public that it is Ghislaine Maxwell and her avaricious associates who’ve actually been exposed for faking photos.

Mucky Madam’s Mark Twain Moment

As she faces sentencing for sex trafficking, morally bankrupt mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell turns to the words of morally superior Mark Twain; all they really have in common is mutual experience of financial bankruptcy.

Randy Andy Turns To Toff Twerps

As Prince Andrew gets support from the dregs of society in the form of disgraced news baron felon toff Lord Black and washed up wastrel daughter of a criminal twerp Lady Victoria Hervey, we suggest he’s truly scraping the barrel.

UnAppealing Ghislaine

Former federal prosecutor suggests convicted mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell’s chances of getting an appeal will have “major hurdles” and will “have to meet a very high standard.”

Curtains For Randy Andy

As a former Buckingham Palace employee reveals that “spoilt” Prince Andrew made her run up four flights of stairs to shut his curtains whilst he sat next to them, we suggest it’s now curtains for him.

Not So Social Randy Andy

As Prince Andrew loses yet more responsibilities, quits social media and plunges deeper into debt, we suggest he turns to one of his last remaining chums, the notoriously noxious skinflint Bernie Ecclestone.

Moron of the Moment 2022 – Lady Victoria Hervey

Lady Victoria Hervey’s latest airing to share irrelevant claims about Ghislaine Maxwell simply show her lack of connection with the real story; this tedious twerp ought to now learn the art of silence.

Friendless Fergie

Simpleton Sarah, Duchess of York “pauses” her unsurprisingly unpopular ‘Fergie & Friends’ YouTube channel as her increasingly friendless husband continues to face sexual assault allegations in New York.

Poundland MeGain – Duchess of Sussex Goes Bananas

In spite of her victory over ‘The Mail on Sunday’ all the Duchess of Sussex will be able to do with her winnings is afford a trip to Poundland; £1 ‘MeGain’ better now also watch out for metaphorical banana skins.

Who Is Gatsby Randolph?

Matthew Steeples previews ‘Who Is Gatsby Randolph?’ and finds it not only refreshingly raucous, but also proof that anyone can achieve their dream.