The Steeple Times asks private aviation entrepreneur Tom McLoughlin: “What’s on your mantelpiece?”
7th January 2013: When we published this interview on 16th August 2012, we were unaware of the real identity of Thomas McLoughlin. He told us he was an ambassador for American Express and all manner of other tales. Our readers responded in their droves and he has now been identified for what he truly is. His answers will remain here as illustration of his persona. The man is an obnoxious fake. If you spot him, contact Chelsea police station as they are very interested in his activities.
Update 13th February 2013: Thomas McLoughlin pleaded guilty to two charges on 28th January 2013 and is due to appear again at Isleworth Crown Court on 11th March 2013. Readers may wish to attend to witness his departure. It’s almost certain they’ll be waving him on his merry way to a Serco prison truck rather than to a Learjet or a Mercedes AMG.
Update 12th April 2013: After having his sentencing delayed for health reasons, Mr McLoughlin is back in court again this morning. We await news with baited breath.
Update 17th May 2013: Mr McLoughlin’s sentencing has been delayed until 12th June whilst the courts await medical evidence.
The Steeple Times shares “wit and wisdom.” What’s your guiding force?
My belief in God and my own God.
“Don’t get even, get medieval” is, in our humble opinion, a great motto. What’s yours?
“Don’t get mad, get even.”
Kerry Katona was considered unacceptable in 2007. Who or what is unacceptable in 2012?
Tony Blair trying to resurrect his political career.
Tony Blair misses being Prime Minister. What do you miss most in your life?
A golf course when I can’t get to one.
What might you swap all your wealth for?
To live out my life on a desert with a certain Italian actress.
Donald Trump was once a case of: “If you owe the bank a thousand, they close you down; but if you owe the bank a billion, you own the bank.” What’s your view on the banking crisis?
Everyone knows that the City has been full of crooks for years. Unfortunately most of them are American now.
What phrase or word do you most loathe?
In the UK, some people consider charity to “begin at home.” What’s your view and what causes do you personally support?
Children’s causes here and around the world. Adults can take care of themselves.
The judge in “Law Abiding Citizen” states: “I can pretty much do whatever I want” before being blown up whilst answering her mobile phone. What’s your view on the appropriate use of such devices?
I wish I could position my mobile phone to assassinate some political leaders in the world.
If you could fill a carriage on The Orient Express, who would be your fellow passengers?
All my ex-business enemies with one or two assassins. Several girlfriends would accompany. The ex-business enemies would be disposed of at the first stop.
If you were unfortunate enough to end up on death row, what would be your last meal and where would you eat it?
My last meal would be Welsh lamb at No. 11 Cadogan Gardens.
What time is it acceptable to consume the first drink of the day?
Champagne at breakfast but nothing else before midday.
A Negroni, a martini or a cup of tea?
A martini with Stelios. I leased him his first five jets for EasyJet in 1994 and then he didn’t need me anymore.
Whose parties do you enjoy the most and why?
The after-party at the New Year’s Day concert in Vienna that I go to annually.
Who is the most positive person you know?
My daughter, Alexandra, aged 14.
What’s your most guilty pleasure?
A bottle of white Burgundy and a punt on Betfair.
If a tattoo were to sum you up, what would it be of?
It would be a butterfly on the arse of a girlfriend.
If you were a car, what marquee would you be?
My car, a Mercedes CL63 AMG.
Cilla Black presented “Surprise, Surprise.” Tell us the most surprising thing about you.
As a private jet captain, I flew 3 plates of Nobu sushi to Baku, Azerbaijan. The sushi cost £2,000 and the flight £78,000.
What’s currently sitting on your mantelpiece?
Photographs of ex-girlfriends.
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