Wednesday, April 24, 2024

Overheard: 3rd March

Classic clangers from the last week

 

Firming the butt

On the smoking terrace at The Rib Room Bar, an Arabic lady told her friend: “Cycling: You’ve got to buy a bike… I’ve tired it all but running on the treadmill now… Running on the treadmill is the only way to get a firm butt”. A Jennifer Lopez in the making?

 

Jennifer Lopez: The queen of the butt
Jennifer Lopez: The queen of the butt

ABC sex

A man on the terrace at Sandy Lane in Barbados told his wife he was divorcing her for a younger woman. When she cried and said she loved him, he reminded her of the status of their sex life. “We’ve only been having ABC sex: anniversary, birthday, Christmas”, he calmly commented. She cried a little more.

 

Flatlining

“I bet that scummy block of flats is dear”, commented a Northerner standing outside a building in Lowndes Square, Knightsbridge to his bleach blonde wife. A passerby overheard him and responded: “Oh yes… And you get Roman Abramovich for a neighbour”. “No thanks”, answered the Northerner: “Oh him… Now, there’s a piece of bloody scum. I’d have to vomit on his doorstep every day”. Charming.

 

Booked

At the National Art Library at the V&A, a Peruvian woman asked: “I know you’re a library but do you have books?” What did she expect would be on offer? Porn films?

 

Lifted

An orange coloured Essex broad in the express lift at Harvey Nick’s: “She was well jel… She was well, well jel…” Her equally glowing friend: “Jel of what babe?” “You know, you know… My figure of course… She told me I looked like Katie Price”. Friend: “The cheek: You’re more of a Jodie Marsh”. Harsh.

 

 

Subscribe to our free once daily email newsletter here:

     

    The Steeple Times
    The Steeple Times
    We research and background check our articles. If you believe we have made and error in some detail please get in touch, we seek always to write the truth and stand against a press owned by a self selected few. Please help us, we will accept all your likes, subscriptions and anonymous suport. The Editor and his team at the Steeple Times.

    1 COMMENT

    1. Once overheard students in a Pub discuss genetics. The skinny fellow said to his friend “How do you determine the genetics of a blonde girl? His friend had a sly grin on his face and said “I merely pull down their jeans.

    LEAVE A REPLY

    Please enter your comment!
    Please enter your name here

    £1 per week Supports The Steeple Times

    Help journalism to remain honest & independent. You can make a difference to the world today.

    3,573FansLike
    2,068FollowersFollow
    16,731FollowersFollow
    4,962SubscribersSubscribe

    Subscribe For DAILY NEWS

    Please subscribe, like and share this unique site, it helps us tremendously. The Steeple Times in return will send you an email at noon each and everyday, that we sincerely hope you will enjoy & look forward to seeing in your inbox.

    AD
    Advertisement

    Trending Now

    Morons of the Moment 2024 – Filthy Fylde Conservative Association

    As man-pestering Mark Menzies, the MP they have supported since 2008, is exposed for yet more sordid sexual shenanigans, the Fylde Conservative Association yet again prove themselves a bunch of nutty nincompoops by sharing tweets about “vile degenerates” making “sexually explicit” comments.

    Lettuce & Jam – Which’ll end up having lasted longer? The Liz Truss lettuce or Meghan Markle’s jam?

    As meddling minx Meghan Markle gets mocked about her jaunt into jam and loopy lettuce-loathing loon Liz Truss gets mocked about bumbling like a buffoon about her book, Samantha Markle speaks exclusively to ‘The Steeple Times’ about her soppy, self-centred sister.

    Most Popular Articles

    The Phil & Matt Show

    Phillip Schofield filmed smoking shisha with his alleged ex-lover Matt McGreevy (and pictured in bed thereafter); another image shows the pair together in photograph...

    Was Mucky Minx Meghan Markle A ‘Yacht Girl’ For ‘Randy Andy’?

    As author Kirby Sommers suggests that the then Meghan Markle likely spent time with Prince Andrew and Jeffrey Epstein before she met Prince Harry, we again highlight the mucky, murkiness and mendacious manner of this alleged “yacht girl.”

    SchofieldLite

    ‘Politicalite’ suggest Phillip Schofield orchestrated his ‘mass coming out’ after a former ‘This Morning’ runner had gone to the press about a supposed relationship...

    Meddling Meghan Markle Expose – Attwood, Hopkins & Steeples

    Expose interview with Matthew Steeples by Shaun Attwood and Jennifer Hopkins about the former Meghan Markle watched over 73,000 times in 16 hours since it aired; Steeples condemns hapless Prince Harry and his meddling menace wife.

    Ampika Pickston

    Oldham born divorcee and former glamour model Ampika Pickston describes herself as “feisty, fun loving and warm hearted”. Now based in Hale Barns, Cheshire...

    Justice for James Scurlock

    Power of social media proven after senseless killing of James Scurlock in Omaha, Nebraska allegedly by a controversial bar owner named Jake Gardner who has been photographed with Donald Trump.

    Nasty NestSeekers

    Entitled Hamptons brat Jonathan Davis exposed for allegedly squatting in Sag Harbor during the coronavirus lockdown; it turns out he’s a realtor with NestSeekers.
    [td_block_6 custom_title="Most Liked..." sort="popular7"]