Saturday, January 28, 2023
HomeTHE SPORTING LIFE

THE SPORTING LIFE

Monster of the Moment – Larysa Switlyk

Massacring monster Larysa Switlyk boasts about killing an endangered Coke’s hartebeest and a wolf also; she shares such for personal profit and frankly Instagram should be ashamed of itself for enabling her.

Five of the Best – Houses for Sports Fanatics

‘The Steeple Times’ discovers five properties that will appeal to serious sports fanatics with a desire to indulge their passions at home that are currently for sale.

Heroine of the Hour – Hollie Doyle

In becoming the first woman in British racing to ride five winners in one day at cumulative odds of 899-1, 23-year-old Hollie Doyle has set herself on course for deserved stardom.

A £1 Million Shooting Brake

Quirky 1966 Aston Martin DB6 Vantage shooting brake with coachwork by Harold Radford goes to auction with a reserve of just under £1 million.

Monster of the Moment – Dr Walter Palmer

Reprehensible “driller killer” dentist Dr Walter Palmer will forever be remembered for slaying ‘Cecil The Lion’; the sexual harasser of his own employees has now gone and done it again – this time the monster massacred an endangered ram.

Runners & Riders – The Oaks and The Derby 2020

‘The Steeple Times’ analyses the selections for a somewhat damp double at Epsom on ‘Super Saturday’; we suggest enjoying The Oaks and The Derby 2020 at home.

Monster of the Moment – Priscilla Magana

Bear butchering barbarian bitch and slutty sportswear seller Priscilla Magana should be banned from social media; this Trump supporting monster instead belongs in the nuthouse.

Hero of the Hour – Abdul Musa Adam

As groom-rider Abdul Musa Adam leads out Shadn at Royal Ascot today, he will inspire many on the eve of World Refugee Day and illustrate the positives of welcoming child refugees.

Runners & Riders – Gold Cup Day at ‘Royal Ascot At Home’

‘The Steeple Times’ analyses the selections for a somewhat damp Gold Cup Day at ‘Royal Ascot At Home’ – very much a day to stay indoors and watch Stradivarius, Frankie Dettori and Sir John Gosden.

Hero of the Hour – Bob Grace

In his humble response to his first win after 38 years of racing at Royal Ascot, winning groom ‘Big Bob’ Grace provided much needed cheer to racing fans everywhere along with his trusty companion Battaash.

Runners & Riders – Powering Up Pinatubo

The Steeple Times’ horse racing tips with an analysis of the top tipsters and their selections for Saturday 6th June 2020’s Quipco 2000 Guineas at Newmarket. Go for Pinatubo or Mums Tipple.

Moron of the Moment – Larysa Switlyk

“Bitch of the first order” Larysa Switlyk takes to Instagram during the coronavirus lockdown to brag about her latest massacres; this moronic monster previously paid to shoot sheep in England.

Hero of the Hour – Jamie Osborne

Queen Mother’s favourite champion jockey turned trainer turns the ‘Valley of the Racehorse’ that is Lambourn alive with the sound of music and viral videos during COVID-19 Racehorse trainer Jamie Osborne’s website includes the amusing...

Who is Chelsea’s ‘Window Twerky’?

‘The Steeple Times’ asks readers to name the brilliantly batshit bonkers bird spotted gyrating in front of Chelsea shop windows during the coronavirus lockdown Spotted on both the Fulham Road and Kings in Chelsea...

Speedy Stirling

Matthew Steeples remembers the motor racing legend Sir Stirling Moss, “the greatest driver never to have won the world championship” Mille Miglia-winning Sir Stirling Moss, whose death at the age of 90 was announced this...

Fahad Takes Flight

Blow to British racing as Sheikh Fahad places his Longholes operation in Newmarket, Suffolk up for sale for £6 million to spend more time in California The impact of the coronavirus pandemic was always going...

Stunning Stonewall

Co-founder of Calvin Klein Inc. puts his 740 acre equestrian estate just an hour from New York up for sale for £81 million; about 65 stake winners and several horses that have competed at...

Hero of the Hour – Joe Wicks

In giving “every single penny he makes” from his online P.E. lessons to the NHS during the coronavirus lockdown of schools, Joe Wicks has shown himself as a hero of the hour On Sunday, the...

A Bowled Down Price

Texan estate for sale for sum 43% less than in 2011; it comes with the “finest private bowling alley in America” and a car museum In March 2015, The Steeple Times featured a Texan mansion...

A Seriously Slow Subaru

Quirky 1970 Subaru 360 police car to be sold at auction; unlike anything Colin McRae drove it’s as slow as a snail Advertised quite accurately in the United States as “cheap and ugly” by its...

Post Paused

Today, after 34 years in business, the ‘Racing Post’ has sadly stopped daily print production due to the coronavirus outbreak British horseracing’s premier publication, the Racing Post, printed its last edition this morning. Now “temporarily...

Lustful Lizzie Replaces Gruesome Ghislaine

With paedophile Jeffrey Epstein’s alleged madam Ghislaine Maxwell still missing, knicker flasher Lizzie Cundy steps into the breach in the forthcoming Cash & Rocket rally Last year, prior to disappearing in the wake of the...

Runners & Riders – Cheltenham Gold Cup 2020

The Steeple Times’ horse racing tips with an analysis of the top tipsters and their selections for today’s Magners Gold Cup at Cheltenham Today might be considered unlucky by some given it is Friday 13th,...

Anth’ Flips

Anthea Turner moves from swinging to flipping – and does so disastrously When in the company of she who enjoys a bit of knicker flashing in restaurants Lizzie Cundy, Anthea Turner often seems to firstly...

Axing Switlyk

Sex toy loving animal slayer Larysa Switlyk appears in a video hurling axes at a wall whilst trying to flog ghastly leggings There’s deranged and then there’s Larysa Switylk. She who likes to shove sex...

BoJo And The Burbot

Matthew Steeples asks: “Could the return of the ‘great lost’ burbot solve Boris Johnson from the impending fisheries negotiations crisis?” You’ve probably never heard of the burbot (also known as the eelpout and the lingcod)....

Cash, Rocket and a Madam

Why won’t the Cash & Rocket ‘charity’ answer a simple question about their past participant, the madam to a paedophile Ghislaine Maxwell? Last year, prior to disappearing off the face of the planet in the...

Moron of the Moment – Larysa Switlyk

Sex toy up the bums of sheep shover Larysa Switlyk takes to social media to moan about what she’s had to quite deservedly endure Larysa Switlyk likes to boast about shoving sex toys up the...

Runners & Riders – Betfair Super Saturday

Our analysis of the selections for Betfair Super Saturday at Newbury today, Saturday 8th February 2020 Today at Newbury and just six weeks before the Cheltenham Festival, a jump racing highlight comes in the form...