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Tuesday, September 29, 2020

Considering Corned Beef

Angry man sends bizarre letter to local newspaper to complain about the design of corned beef tins

There are people with too much time on their hands and then there’s Daniel Farrington of Poplar Avenue, Sandiacre.

 

Mr Farrington took the time, according to a post shared on the ‘Angry People in Local Newspapers’ group on Facebook to write to The Derby Telegraph to let out his feeling for the need for “easy-to-open corned beef tins.”

 

Considering Corned Beef – Daniel Farrington writes to Derby Telegraph – Angry man sends bizarre letter to local newspaper to complain about the design of corned beef tins.
Daniel Farrington’s letter and an example of a corned beef tin complete with the key he so loathes.

His most curious missive read:

 

Arguably the most tasty meat on offer, in my view, today, is corned beef, which, when consumed with a little mustard and raw onion is a minor gastronomic delight, that is if one can successfully access the meat from the tin in the first place.

 

Somewhat precariously fixed to the little tin in a small key, surely a relic from early Victorian times, which I have had to replace with a judicious use of a pair of pliers, with only limited success.

 

On the last three occasions, after tentatively working my way around the tin, the metal strip has broken leaving me to complete the job with the reverse side of a hammer.

 

Perhaps a small axe would have been more effective.

 

About 25 years ago, a leading corned beef manufacturer replaced the awkward little tin with a conventional tin and all was well.


However, a little later they reverted back to the naughty little tin, which, incidentally defies the ordinary tin opener.

 

For many corned beef lovers, hopelessness has since prevailed.

 

Surely, in 2020, our corned beef purveyors can do better than this.

 

Correctly summing up the strange letter, one group member responded: “The Derby Telegraph should have put this in the SPAM folder.” On a previous occasion in 2018, Mr Farrington wrote to the Nottingham Post alleging hospitals engage in euthanasia. He concluded: “I am keeping well away and treating myself with the Highland Dew. At 76, it is all I can do.”

 

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6 COMMENTS

    • Yes, I agree that the mechanism of a pathetic little key is fraught with difficulty. However, if you’re successful you’ve just opened up a can of corned beef. Yuk. Why not give up on both tin and content and find something less ghastly to eat?

  1. I cannot say I have pondered this matter before, but I can suggest that Mr Farrington probably had consumed rather a lot of Highland Dew on the night he wrote this letter.

  2. Do NOT send this boring man Down Under!!!!!!!!! He would upset even the most stupid Sheila!!!!!!!!!!!! Lock him up!!!!!!!!!!!

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