Monday, February 26, 2024

Restraining Poundland Pikey Pricey 2022 – Katie Price Faces Jail

As Katie Price is finally forced to face the prospect of jail for breaching a restraining order, we suggest it is time this “gutter slag” grew up

‘Poundland Pikey’ Katie Price likes to call other women “gutter slags.” She, in fact, is one herself and now faced with jail for breaching a restraint order, this bombastic braindead bird may finally be taught a clearly very necessary behavioural lesson.


‘Five by Three’ Miss Price – a 44-year-old mother of five children by three dads – was arrested in January for breaching a restraining order and previously has been charged with drink driving and described as having “one of the worst driving records ever seen.”


Associated mostly now with the words “troubled” and “trash,” this boozed-up binbag has at least 21 offences linked to her name and is likely “at risk of receiving an immediate custodial sentence” once sentencing occurs next month. She has been rightly labelled “nasty” and “vile” and her “foul mouthed tirades of abuse” are frankly what she’ll ultimately only be remembered for.


Aside from speeding offences, flipping a car whilst drunk and ignoring letters from the police, this plastic-not-fantastic wench has repeatedly stuck her plastic-not-fantastic fingers up to the law now on one occasion too many. It is time for Katie Price to be locked up and locked up not only for the safety of others; it is time that Katie Price is given a dose of gruel and reminded that she ought not be considered above the law.


Carl Woods
Katie Price arriving at Lewes Crown Court with her fiancé Carl Woods on Wednesday.
Drunk 1
Social media users reacted to the anything but glamorous ‘glamour model’s’ current situation by demanding she be “jailed for her own good” after her latest court appearance over calling her ex-husband’s fiancée a “gutter slag.” One Twitter user remarked: “She’s had more than enough chances to stop her destructive behaviour. I feel sorry for her kids.”
Drunk 2
After pleading guilty, Judge Stephen Mooney told the mouthy mother of five: “Clearly you have accepted for an offence and pleaded guilty and you are aware you committed the offence while on a suspended sentence and are at risk of going to prison.”
Mucky Mansion
In 2012, we were somewhat more charitable about “mucky mansion” dwelling Miss Price in remarking: “This glamour model is to be commended for having made a fortune. Her taste in men and cars however is utterly lacking. Her pink Range Rover is perhaps symbolic of all that is wrong about her.” In the time since, this British Pounland equivalent of Paris Hilton has sadly morphed into a reprehensible ratbag and turned her life into a trash can of sleaze and sordidness. One has to pity her poor children for being forced to put up with a succession of trashy men and their messed up mother’s frankly revolting antics.

Twitter reacts to the Brighton born ‘Page 3 Girl’s’ latest travails:

Twitter 1
Twitter user Reece Sanford labelled the ‘Five by Three’ a “vile slapper” and asked: “Is this vile slapper just allowed to get away with anything?”
Twitter 2
Another account pointed to Carl Woods’s Mercedes-Benz G-Wagen having illegal front window tinting. They could also have remarked on his ghastly outfit and his hideous barnet.
Twitter 3
Twitter user ‘Tommy H’ demanded that this serial offender ends up in prison and suggested: “This woman seems to do whatever the f**k she wants.”
Twitter 4
Another, Tessa Rose surmised: “9 driving offences, 6 driving bans and still driving illegal. Not to mention restraining order and her stint in rehab.” She added: “As she repeatedly keeps driving without a licence, she’s not remorseful and won’t ever learn.”
Twitter 5
‘Eric Eats Pickles’ raged: “Does she have to kill someone to get banned?” and added: “One of the worst driving records I have ever seen.” We could add: “Wouldn’t it have been cheaper and more sensible for this silly bint to have just employed a chauffeur?”
Matthew Steeples
Matthew Steeples
A graduate of the London School of Economics, Matthew Steeples is a writer and marketing consultant. He conceived The Steeple Times as a media arena to fill the void between the Mail Online, The Huffington Post and such organs as the New York Social Diary in 2012.


  1. Everything is played out for publicity.
    It matters not whether its good or bad and I am now annoyed with myelf for two misdemeanours.
    1. Reading about her
    2. Commenting about her.

    Please can we make The Steeple Times a Priceless Zone?
    …pretty please.

  2. Joan is exactly right, her whole life is simply to gain publicity, be it good or bad. It keeps bird brains like this in the limelight, which is what they crave. It reminds me of the Kardashians, quite simple being famous for just being famous, and nothing else.


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