Saturday, December 6, 2025

Damp Chips

Moaning granny complains to local newspaper about being treated like “trailer trash” after being “forced” to eat chips in the rain

Joanne Leaman – a chav-like woman resembling something like Vicky Pollard from Little Britain – took her children, grandchildren and friends to a café named Cheeky Monkeys in Newcastle-under-Lyme for cones of £1.25 chips on a rainy day this week. She then decided to moan to StokeonTrentLive about what happened next.

 

This chippy granny told the paper that the café owner wouldn’t let the group sit down and “basically ordered [them] out.” She droned on: “I felt he [the café manager] picked on us because we were a group. It felt like we were trailer trash… It’s not on… They didn’t even offer us an umbrella.”

 

Continuing of their soggy experience Ms Leaman added: “If we had wanted to eat chips in the rain I would have gone to Blackpool Pier… My six-year-old was really upset, she’d been looking forward to it. All we wanted was a cone of chips and it turned into a disaster.”

 

A spokesman for Cheeky Monkeys curtly responded: “We only do cones of chips to takeaway and that is what she purchased.”

 

Plainly Hayley Parker of the StokeonTrentLive really struggled to find news this week. Who will she be chipping away at next?

 

Pictured top: To bolster her story, Joanne Leaman forced her family to pose for a “newspaper ready” photos in the rain outside the Cheeky Monkeys café.

 

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2 COMMENTS

  1. Tight fisted bovine. Does she not know that 25p VAT per portion should be added for the privilege of having them tipped onto a plate and eaten inside. Of course she could have economised further and had a pile of chips and also sat her children under the Post Office van and JCB parked outside. I guess Postman Pat, and Bob the Builder are too coarse.

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