Saturday, August 20, 2022

Getting Johnny Depp’s Goat – Ridiculous Rabid Ranter Arwa Mahdawi

Rabid ranter, author and brand strategist Arwa Mahdawi’s enthusiasm for goats and dislike of Johnny Depp shows her as ridiculous suggests Matthew Steeples

“It’s time we stopped telling women to act like men and started telling men to lead like women” reads a banner on Strong Female Lead author and New York based brand strategist Arwa Mahdawi’s Twitter handle.



Bizarrely, next, in her description of herself on the aforementioned social media site – which also includes a promoting her book that is said to contain “incest in Iceland, garbage trucks in Taiwan and cuckoo clocks in Texas” – Mahdawi bangs on about “goat jokes” but claims her book is “not about goats.” She doesn’t, however, say whether she’s ever had an encounter with the Capreolus Club or whether she’s ever joined them to “take a break from deer” to slay such ruminant mammals in the north of England or Scotland.


Now, this morning in an opinion piece for The Guardian, in spite of Johnny Depp clearly having been very much victorious in his American libel battle against Amber Heard, Mahdawi declared that “misogyny is more alluring to many people than facts” and suggested that a “lot of unpleasant new information about Depp” has recently been revealed.



Going further, in a clearly biased rant against the Pirates of the Caribbean star, the columnist added: “It’s important to note that’s as if he looked like a boy scout in the first place… Depp has a well-documented history of toxic behaviour.” She then added: “There was a very long line of people ready to dismiss his bad behaviour while jumping on any excuse to paint Heard in a negative light.”


Though Mahdawi contined: “Heard endured merciless mocking and walked away with her reputation in tatters, while Hollywood largely rallied around Depp,” I will again stand by my article of 4th May and again repeat that “though Depp clearly has issues and is far from perfect,” it is, as his own lawyer Benjamin Chew pointed out, Heard who is the abuser in this story.


After all, as I remarked then of Heard: “Here indeed is a woman who supposedly chopped off part of her husband’s finger, stubbed out cigarettes in his face and relieved herself in their marital bed. Reportedly ‘jealous’ of her husband’s fame and prone to ‘experiencing increased agitation… anger and rage’ according to her own personal nurse Erin Falati, here also is a troubled bisexual drug user with a ‘familial history of substance abuse… anxiety, eating disorder[s], Attention Deficit Disorder, bipolar disorder, codependence issues and occasional insomnia.’”


Aside from the kind of bag of bilge written by her this morning about the deserved victor in the Depp v Heard case, Mahdawi has penned many other columns that have been equally ludicrous. In 2019, she wrote a piece about air conditioning titled: “Is your home constantly set a ‘sexist’ temperature? You’re not alone: A new study finds men tend to get their way in household temperature discussions while women must compromise.”


Strong Female Lead
‘The Guardian’ columnist begs people to “plz buy my book” on her Twitter feed. She has 17,700 followers but whether each and every one of them has actually bought ‘Strong Female Lead’ is unknown. The clearly patronising book was “published in paperback [on] 26th May 2022.”
Capreolus Club goat slaughter
What this somewhat crackpot crazy author’s views are on goat slaying and the Capreolus Club are also unknown, but what is sure she does like to bang on about these ruminant mammals rather a lot. God only knows why.
Ivanka Trump
It’s not just Johnny Depp that uspets the columnist, brand strategist and author. She also declared “Ivanka Trump’s new haircut should make us very afraid” in one of her especially strange features. Of the daughter of the 45th POTUS, Mahdawi ridiculously declared: “If her family cares about anything, it is image. Her political bob (pob) may be an attempt to get us to take her ambitions more seriously.” Off-the-scale nonsense, clearly.
Violence is the only answer left
In suggesting “violence is the only answer left” when attempting to “end racism,” surely this rambling ranter went too bloody far? Nobody rational would sanction attacks upon others surely and that this gibberish got published is beyond ridiculous.
Sexist air conditioning
Illustrating herself as nothing but a wack job, this woman – described online as a “gargantuan hypocrite and the stereotypical media hack whose sole objective is to peddle propaganda” – wrote about air conditioning in November 2019. In it, she argued that “the thermostat dictator is normally a man.” Whatever will she argue next? Will she blame Hitler for climate change or will she suggest that Cilla Black is responsible for a rise in divorce rates?
Matthew Steeples
Matthew Steeples
A graduate of the London School of Economics, Matthew Steeples is a writer and marketing consultant. He conceived The Steeple Times as a media arena to fill the void between the Mail Online, The Huffington Post and such organs as the New York Social Diary in 2012.


  1. Right on Matthew, thank you for exposing the clear bias this columnist from The Guardian!!!!! I watched the whole Depp-Heard trial and Heard is a consummate abuser…


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