Saturday, April 9, 2022

Overheard: 31st March

Section:

Classic clangers from the last week

 

blank

Confusing ‘whore’ and’ here’

A businessman standing at Euston Station was approached by a Chinese tourist who asked: “Where do you get whore?” The startled businessman answered: “I have no idea”. The Chinese man answered: “I is lost”. The businessman: “Ah, I see. I thought you wanted a prostitute”. The Chinese man went red and punched the other man.

 

blank
blank

You sad cow

A woman in the Eclipse bar in Walton Street to her female friend: “I didn’t have a relationship for five years and now I want one”. Her companion responded: “I’ve been single for eight years and I love it”. The first woman answered: “You sad cow”.

 

Its not just yummy mummies who are overheard gossiping at Aubaine
Its not just yummy mummies who are overheard gossiping at Aubaine

LA chicken

A British businessman at Aubaine in South Kensington: “I was vegetarian for over 10 years but when I was in LA, I ate chicken because it’s so healthy there”. “Really? No, I don’t think so”, responded his surprised companion. “The American food industry is the most unhealthy in the world. That’s the truth”. “You’re wrong”, said the chicken loving veggie: “LA chicken is just the dog’s bollocks”.

 

Tropically blonde

A conversation between two very tanned blondes at the Hospital for Tropical Diseases was overheard by one of our readers. Blonde 1: “I can’t believe I’m sitting an NHS waiting room”. Blonde 2: “At least everyone knows you’ve been somewhere exotic and tropical. They don’t treat just any common illness here”. Our source: “Absolutely girls. I contracted my parasite in Sussex”. Blonde 1: “Do you mean there’s a Sussex in Australia?”. Our source nearly choked.

 

 

Subscribe to our free once daily email newsletter here:

     

    blank
    blank
    blank
    The Steeple Times
    We research and background check our articles. If you believe we have made and error in some detail please get in touch, we seek always to write the truth and stand against a press owned by a self selected few. Please help us, we will accept all your likes, subscriptions and anonymous suport. The Editor and his team at the Steeple Times.

    2 COMMENTS

    1. Overheard in a centre for aged. Two Elderly gentleman were discussing the youth and quoting John Tapene.
      Tapene a former college principal offered the following words from a judge who regularly dealt with the youth.
      “Always we hear the cry from teenagers “What can we do, Where can we go?
      My answer is this; Go home, mow the lawn, wash the windows, learn to cook, build a raft, get a job, visit the sick, study your lessons and after you are done, read a book.
      Your community and town does not owe you recreational facilities and your parents do not owe you fun.
      The world does not owe you a living, you owe the world something, you owe it your time, energy and talent so that no one will be at war, in sickness and lonely again. In other words grow up stop being a cry baby, get out of your dream world and develop a backbone not a wishbone. Behave responsible. Sadly teenagers today have too many rights, and with these rights comes the sense of entitlement. Chris Grayling and Nick Clegg will buy them more Smart Televisions and Play Stations in the youth offending institutions.

    2. Surely this is not an apocryphal story (surely!)

      A young man is looking for a place to sit in a crowded university library. He asked a girl sitting alone at a table: “Do you mind if I sit beside you?

      The girl replied with a loud voice: “I DON ‘T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!”

      All the students in the library started staring at the man who was truly embarrassed and moved to another table.

      After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the young man’s table and said with a laugh “I study psychology, and I know what a man is thinking. I’m sure you felt embarrassed, right?”

      The man then responded with a loud voice:

      “£250 FOR ONE NIGHT? THAT’S MUCH TOO MUCH!”

      All the people in the library looked at the girl in shock.

      The young man whispered in her ear: “I study law, and I really know how to screw people”.

    LEAVE A REPLY

    Please enter your comment!
    Please enter your name here

    £1 per week Supports The Steeple Times

    Help journalism to remain honest & independent. You can make a difference to the world today.

    2,854FansLike
    2,068FollowersFollow
    12,519FollowersFollow

    Subscribe For DAILY NEWS

    Please subscribe, like and share this unique site, it helps us tremendously. The Steeple Times in return will send you an email at noon each and everyday, that we sincerely hope you will enjoy & look forward to seeing in your inbox.

    AD
    Advertisement

    Recent and Popular

    Feckless Farting Fergie’s Flatulent Failings

    That taker of loans from paedophiles and reader of books about farting Sarah, Duchess of York thinks she can get away with keeping £225,000 in tainted cash shows her yet again as nothing but a total berk.

    Amanda Awakens – Amanda Eliasch on Ukraine

    In her latest feature discussion shared on YouTube, Amanda Eliasch sparks debate about Ukraine and ignites passion and fury from eternally eccentric Philip Sallon and anything but bashful Brexiteer Alice Grant.

    The House of Maxwell, The House of Hell

    Matthew Steeples suggests the BBC’s ‘House of Maxwell’ to have been nothing but a damp squib that revealed little-to-nothing new about the mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell and her pension pot plundering papa.

    Shame On Michael Barrymore’s Supporters

    Elizabeth J. Bond returns to the case of the murder of Stuart Lubbock, debunks myths about what happened that night and slams Michael Barrymore and his shameful supporters.

    Recent and Popular

    Who REALLY is Omid Scobie?

    An examination of the true character traits of the Duchess of Sussex’s PR peddling biased ‘bestie’ Omid Scobie by Nikolay Kalinin.

    Justice for James Scurlock

    Power of social media proven after senseless killing of James Scurlock in Omaha, Nebraska allegedly by a controversial bar owner named Jake Gardner who has been photographed with Donald Trump.

    Moron of the Moment – Prince Harry

    With his marriage to the woman formerly known as Meghan Markle, Prince Harry has morphed into an utter bore   Prince Harry used to be a...

    Scobie Orf!

    ‘MeGain’s’ bestie Omid Scobie deservedly gets slammed by ‘Yankee Wally’ Sadie Quinlan for getting her shut down on Twitter; this childish chap should now just ‘belt up, wrap up and shut up.’