Under Luke Johnson’s reign Patisserie Valerie collapsed. He claimed the experience of masterminding the destruction of a business that employed 3,000 people “shattered [his] self-belief.” Oh diddums for the poor lamb.
After not so modestly admitting he was “arrogant at times,” Johnson announced: “I still have a contribution to make” and in the last edition of The Sunday Times, he decided to patronizingly lecture the British public about the con that is alcohol free spirits.
Lauding the Emperor’s New Clothes of the drinks sector – given that their manufacturers charge the same price for them as for their heavily taxed alcoholic counterparts (and thus make vastly more in profit) – Johnson claimed “entrepreneurs will quench that thirst” and should “embrace” appalling tasting products such as Seedlip.
Two stories to keep beside you

Out To Lunch
As a Westminster councillor’s penchant for meals at 5 Hertford Street and the home of the owner of the ‘Daily Mail’ is highlighted, we suggest it is high time elected officials’ extravagance be reigned in The problem with too many elected officials is that they love the perks more than they love serving the […]

Food Fury – Tezza The Steak Terror
Angry supposedly homophobic ex-Labour councillor contacts his local newspaper to rant about buying supposedly rotten meat in Morrisons There are people with too much time on their hands and then there’s Terry Lawton from Tollesby, Teesside. Featured in an article in Teesside Live on Monday by one Samuel Jones, the former Labour and independent […]
Frankly, another columnist for The Times named Luke made more sense the following day. In a one page feature, Luke Jones spoke of being “tired of hearing friends boasting of their abstinence” and shared his experiences of drinking martinis every day during January. We say an almighty cheers to that.
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Readers have their say
4 comments
A Negroni and a dry Martinis can bring the sun into a cloudy day as long as both are well made by a skilful barman.
A glass of spring water tastes infinitely superior to the likes of Seedlip
Spot on Nicky – Seedlip is made from tree bark. Who on earth would want to drink bloody tree bark? A martini, a Gin & French or a Gin & It every day. Or on high days and holidays, a Vesper martini at Duke’s Hotel.
Luke Johnson is a job killer… Luke Jones sounds like he likes to enjoy life. I know which one I’d listen to.
Luke Johnson talks Barry Bull.