The Steeple Times asks football guru Pontus Maltborg: “What’s on your mantelpiece?”
The Steeple Times shares “wit and wisdom”. What’s your guiding force?
The struggle for excellence.
“Don’t get even, get medieval” is, in our humble opinion, a great motto. What’s yours?
Life is a bitch and then you die.
Kerry Katona was considered unacceptable in 2007. Who or what is unacceptable in 2013?
Leggings.
Tony Blair misses being Prime Minister. What do you miss most in your life?
Living like a true Roman.
What might you swap all your wealth for?
Infinite influence and power.
Donald Trump was once a case of: “If you owe the bank a thousand, they close you down; but if you owe the bank a billion, you own the bank”. What’s your view on the banking crisis?
No one should be too big to fail. Let the weak ones bleed out and have the strong ones emerge from the ashes.
What phrase or word do you most loathe?
“Date” (or the Swedish-fied “dejt”).
In the UK, some people consider charity to “begin at home”. What’s your view and what causes do you personally support?
Charity begins with knowledge.
The judge in Law Abiding Citizen states: “I can pretty much do whatever I want” before being blown up whilst answering her mobile phone. What’s your view on the appropriate use of such devices?
Phones are limited bring on the Google goggles.
If you could fill a carriage on The Orient Express, who would be your fellow passengers?
Luciano Moggi, Sofia Vergara, Franz Beckenbauer, Michel Platini and Adrianne Palicki.
If you were unfortunate enough to end up on death row, what would be your last meal and where would you eat it?
It would be a bacchanalia of course with all the rituals that such a feast would entail. I’d probably allow the priestess to sacrifice me whilst being in a frenzied state of blissful and sweet agony.
What time is it acceptable to consume the first drink of the day?
When you are thirsty.
A Negroni, a martini or a cup of tea?
Whichever is coldest.
Whose parties do you enjoy the most and why?
Masquerades tend to be interesting. I believe I am yet to attend and meet the person who throws the best parties.
Who is the most positive person you know?
Tommy Söderberg.
What’s your most guilty pleasure?
Alcohol.
If a tattoo were to sum you up, what would it be of?
A pyramid with an eye in the middle.
If you were a car, what marque would you be?
I couldn’t possibly say but something custom and limited and very exclusive yet high in performance.
Cilla Black presented Surprise, Surprise. Tell us the most surprising thing about you.
That I’m an incurable romantic at heart.
What’s currently sitting on your mantelpiece?
A candle, some perfume and my shades.
Pontus Maltborg is a football guru based between Stockholm and Warsaw.
Follow him on Twitter here.
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