Hurricane Heather

Heather Mills puts her Sussex home up for rent

Has Heather Mills, the daughter of a convicted fraudster, spent her entire £24.3 million divorce settlement? We all knew that this lady with an interesting past was a spendaholic but the fact that she’s put her 8 bedroomed country home up for rent for £7,995 per month could be an indication that the former wife of Sir Paul McCartney is suffering like the rest of us during this economic slump.

Mills’ arts and crafts residence in Brightling Road, Robertsbridge, Sussex dates to 1914 and stands in 15 acres of wooded grounds. Bought with part of her divorce settlement, the house includes 6 reception rooms and 6 bathrooms and a childrens’ play area that the former glamour model plainly created for her daughter Beatrice.  The kitchen is designed for the cooking of the vomit inducing “plant based raw diet” meals favoured by Newcastle born Mills and features a Rangemaster oven, Maytag fridge freezer and a wine cooler. A cloakroom is appropriately described as featuring a “Crapper’s WC” and the master suite includes an “en-suite” shower room with a “rain sky waterfall shower” large enough for the ego of a woman best known for hurling a jug of water over Fiona, now Baroness Shackleton.

Mills’ lack of business acumen since her divorce has been clearly illustrated several times over. First there was the disaster of the Vbites café she opened in Hove Lagoon in 2009. Diners were not impressed and described the food as “of such poor quality” and “tasting like worms.” Equally the investment of this proven compulsive liar, who was previously engaged to my neighbour Raffaele Mincione, in Redwood Foods hasn’t exactly paid off either.

Brand Heather has never rung true in my mind and yet again her attempt to rent out her home is only indication of another hurricane she must be fronting.

If you do fancy living like Heather Mills, contact Savills of Tunbridge Wells on +44 (0) 1892 314 453. Website: http://www.savills.com

If you can stomach reading her bile, go to Heather Mills’ official site at http://www.heathermills.org

For more on Vbites see http://www.vbites.com

If you really wish to follow Heather Mills you can find her on Twitter at http://twitter.com/heatherofficial