Sunday, April 18, 2021

Overheard: 14th August

Classic clangers from the last week

 

Killing a festival

“I can’t believe the cheek” stated a student just back from a music festival: “Donna tried to kill herself in a Portaloo. What on earth’s wrong with her? Talk about effin’ inconsiderate. Sam Smith hadn’t even come on yet”.

 

Stinking wallpaper

“I was with Stinky Martin last night” declared a scaffolder in a café in SE1. “He wanted me to do his wallpapering at his ex-wife’s flat. I agreed though I’d never done it before”. His colleague answered: “What happened?” The first casually replied: “She is too gluey for me and she’s got BO. Before I’d got the first roll on, she tried it on. I got out after I’d distracted her by telling her to go and fetch the Lynx”.

 

Elder Zhao and his fellow Mormon will probably keep quiet on buses henceforth
Badged on a bus

Religiously happy

“I’m always willing to try something new” a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of The Latter-day Saints was overheard to say to his badged friend, Elder Zhao, on a bus on Kensington High Street. A fellow passenger turned and mockingly responded: “Have you thought about becoming gay?” The other Elder answered: “I’m perfectly happy, thank you”.

 

Pensioning off Williams

A pensioner in a pub in Sussex was overheard to lament the loss of her Labrador. She told the publican: “She was taken too soon. Everyone is going on about Robin Williams but they never knew him. I loved Bertha yet I’m the only one going on about her. She’s the one who should have a star in Hollywood”.

 

 

Subscribe to our free once daily email newsletter here:

     

    5e3b97728b2e4bf58c9ff7822befe328?s=96&d=mm&r=g
    The Steeple Times
    We research and background check our articles. If you believe we have made and error in some detail please get in touch, we seek always to write the truth and stand against a press owned by a self selected few. Please help us, we will accept all your likes, subscriptions and anonymous suport. The Editor and his team at the Steeple Times.

    LEAVE A REPLY

    Please enter your comment!
    Please enter your name here

    Advertisement
    Advertisement

    Become a Patron of The Steeple Times

    Independent journalism will only remain independent if it is supported by clear-thinking people like you. We each have the command to make a real difference. Join us.

    2,588FansLike
    2,068FollowersFollow
    10,908FollowersFollow

    Subscribe For DAILY NEWS

    Please subscribe, like and share this very British site, it helps us grow. Your data is protected and The Steeple Times will send you an email at noon everyday that we rather trust you will enjoy.

    Advertisement

    Other Stories You May Enjoy

    Don’t Come On Carrie! The nation does NOT need Carrie Symonds – Matthew Steeples argues that Daniel Johnson’s “Come on, Carrie: your country needs you!” call to Boris Johnson’s wine chucking latest baby mama is nothing but claptrap.

    Don’t Come On Carrie!

    Matthew Steeples argues that Daniel Johnson’s “Come on Carrie: your country needs you!” call to Boris Johnson’s wine chucking latest baby mama is nothing but claptrap.
    Theresa’s in the Trough – Theresa May MP’s £1.2m in 2020 – 2021 – Matthew Steeples highlights that it is not just David Cameron who has been sticking his piggy fingers in the trough; Theresa May also ‘pocketed’ over £1.2 million in the last year alone.

    Theresa’s in the Trough

    Matthew Steeples highlights that it is not just David Cameron who has been sticking his piggy fingers in the trough; Theresa May also ‘pocketed’ over £1.2 million in the last year alone.
    The Spectre Shooting Brake – 1 of 1 Rolls-Royce Wraith shooting brake – 2015 Rolls-Royce Wraith converted to a shooting brake by automotive genius Niels van Roij for sale for 157% more than it originally cost – Bonhams at their ‘Les Grandes Marques à Monaco’ sale in Monte Carlo on 23rd April 2021 with an estimate of £320,000 to £480,000 ($440,000 to $660,000, €370,000 to €550,000 or درهم1.6 million to درهم2.4 million).

    The Spectre Shooting Brake

    2015 Rolls-Royce Wraith converted to a ‘Spectre’ shooting brake by automotive genius Niels van Roij for sale for 157% more than it originally cost.
    Courting Expletives 2021 – Emma Rivers v Jigsaw Homes Tameside – Extraordinary official civil judgment from the County Court at Manchester packed with expletives sums up the state of once Great Britain; one is simply left wondering if potty mouthed Emma Rivers was trained by the creosoted napkin slapper Dawn Ward.

    Courting Expletives

    Extraordinary official civil judgment from the County Court at Manchester packed with expletives sums up the state of the nation; one is simply left wondering if potty mouthed Emma Rivers was trained by the creosoted napkin slapper Dawn Ward.
    Beecher’s Muck – Far right Jay Beecher supports Ghislaine Maxwell – Ghislaine Maxwell’s latest supporter revealed to be Jay Beecher, a far right-wing political writer and ex-Ukipper with associations to the quite rightly banned-from-Facebook ‘Politicalite’

    Beecher’s Muck

    Ghislaine Maxwell’s latest supporter revealed to be Jay Beecher, a far right-wing political writer and ex-Ukipper with associations to the quite rightly banned-from-Facebook ‘Politicalite’
    Mucky Maxwell & Meddling Madeley – Ghislaine Maxwell apologist Richard Madeley exposed – EXCLUSIVE – Richard Madeley is an apologist for Ghislaine Maxwell suggests ‘The Steeple Times’ and his wife, of course, was an apologist for another sexual abuser, footballer Ched Evans.

    Mucky Maxwell & Meddling Madeley

    EXCLUSIVE – Meddling Richard Madeley is an apologist for Ghislaine Maxwell suggests ‘The Steeple Times’ whilst his wife, of course, was criticised for her views on sexual abusers in 2014.
    Heroine of the Hour 2021 – Irish jockey Rachael Blackmore – In becoming the first woman ever to win the Grand National, Rachael Blackmore has brought much needed joy to the racing world.

    Heroine of the Hour 2021 – Rachael Blackmore

    In becoming the first woman ever to win the Grand National, Rachael Blackmore has brought much needed joy to the racing world.
    Hero of the Hour 2021 – 86-year-old steeplejack Peter Harknett – That 86-year-old steeplejack Peter Harknett has just completed his final job climbing St Giles Church in Horsted Keynes is remarkable.

    Hero of the Hour 2021 – Peter Harknett

    That 86-year-old steeplejack Peter Harknett has just completed his final job climbing St Giles Church in Horsted Keynes is remarkable.
    Wicked Worldwide Webbed Ghislaine 2021 – Ghislaine Maxwell website – Ghislaine Maxwell’s family opted to “bury bad news” on the day Prince Philip died by launching a new website in support of the mucky madam; on it they share that the wicked wench is reading a book by peddler of piffle Boris Johnson and elsewhere follows Richard and Judy on Twitter.

    Wicked Worldwide Webbed Ghislaine

    Ghislaine Maxwell’s family opted to “bury bad news” on the day Prince Philip died by launching a new website in support of the mucky madam; on it they share that the wicked wench is reading a book by peddler of piffle Boris Johnson and elsewhere follows Richard and Judy on Twitter.
    Runners & Riders – The Grand National 2021 – ‘The Steeple Times’ examines the tipsters’ selections and offers 4 options for Saturday’s crowded Grand National 2021.

    Runners & Riders – The Grand National 2021

    ‘The Steeple Times’ examines the tipsters’ selections and offers 4 options for Saturday’s crowded Grand National 2021.

    Popular Articles From The Past

    Weather

    London
    overcast clouds
    2.1 ° C
    4 °
    -0.6 °
    75 %
    0.5kmh
    99 %
    Sun
    13 °
    Mon
    16 °
    Tue
    16 °
    Wed
    13 °
    Thu
    12 °