Tuesday, May 24, 2022

Taking revenge on the Seven Layer Salad

Claire Douglass regrets beginning a meal in Wisconsin with a ‘Seven Layer Salad’

 

blank

Though I have gnawed on iguana in Panama, meat I dared not ask the origin of off street carts in various Asian countries, swampy ‘gator in the South of the United States, frogs, snails and offal of various kinds, I have only experienced culinary culture shock in one place: Wisconsin.

 

The'Seven Layer Salad' did not prove popular with Claire Douglass
The ‘Seven Layer Salad’ did not prove popular with Claire Douglass

The first meal I managed not to eat was offered in that fair state; by “fair”, I mean they have lots of them. The first of several plates – I will continue onto the main and pudding in separate articles – was a ‘Seven Layer Salad’ brought to the table with a flourish usually reserved for a stuffed swan. Upon beholding said creation, I immediately feigned a dodgy stomach due to a sushi dinner the night before. Since no one at this table of eight had ever had sushi, plausibility was secure. Queen Victoria may have drunk finger water to appease a visiting African royal, but I am a commoner, and no such grace was forthcoming.

blank
blank

 

Imagine, if you will, this lovely concoction, in a “special” glass bowl so that the full glory of it may be appreciated, from the bottom layer up: iceberg lettuce from a bag; soggy tinned green beans; tinned corn; bacon “bits” and tinned black olives. Each of these layers were covered in ‘Miracle Whip’. The “miracle” is that a bottle has ever sold, the “whip” being what the inventor deserves. For the pièce de résistance it came with a mini dried onion ring topping.

 

Needless to say, the repast was one that made me long for finger water soup. How could I not have known that worse was yet to come?

 

Follow Claire Douglass on Twitter at @ClaireLaCubana.

 

 

Subscribe to our free once daily email newsletter here:

     

    blank
    blank
    The Steeple Times
    The Steeple Times
    We research and background check our articles. If you believe we have made and error in some detail please get in touch, we seek always to write the truth and stand against a press owned by a self selected few. Please help us, we will accept all your likes, subscriptions and anonymous suport. The Editor and his team at the Steeple Times.

    3 COMMENTS

    LEAVE A REPLY

    Please enter your comment!
    Please enter your name here

    £1 per week Supports The Steeple Times

    Help journalism to remain honest & independent. You can make a difference to the world today.

    2,929FansLike
    2,068FollowersFollow
    13,061FollowersFollow

    Subscribe For DAILY NEWS

    Please subscribe, like and share this unique site, it helps us tremendously. The Steeple Times in return will send you an email at noon each and everyday, that we sincerely hope you will enjoy & look forward to seeing in your inbox.

    AD
    Advertisement

    Trending Now

    Goat Killers Gone! Mark’s Club Banish Sick Capreolus Club

    As Mark’s Club claim they never even agreed to an event for the twisted twerp members of the goat slaying Capreolus Club, we delight in the fact that they’ve now removed promotion of their September shenanigans and celebrate the success of our Change.org petition.

    Getting Our Goat – Mark’s Club, Mayfair To Host Party For Goat Killers

    ‘The Steeple Times’ launches a petition calling on Mayfair’s Mark’s Club – owned by the bouffant haired billionaire Richard Caring – to cancel an event for the Capreolus Club – an organisation that shockingly charges its members to shoot GOATS in the British Isles.

    Markle v Markle – £60,000 Defamation Demand Against Duchess of Sussex

    As the estranged half-sister of the Duchess of Sussex demands £60,000 from her for defamation, we remind the ‘Modern Day Mrs Simpson’ that she’d do well to heal her familial rifts in private.

    Moron of the Moment 2022 – Michael Fabricant MP

    That bleached blonde bisexual bore Michael Fabricant MP thinks it funny to make jokes about a Tory colleague accused of rape shows that he is nothing but a deranged, dimwitted dunce.

    Most Popular Artcles

    Who REALLY is Omid Scobie?

    An examination of the true character traits of the Duchess of Sussex’s PR peddling biased ‘bestie’ Omid Scobie by Nikolay Kalinin.

    Justice for James Scurlock

    Power of social media proven after senseless killing of James Scurlock in Omaha, Nebraska allegedly by a controversial bar owner named Jake Gardner who has been photographed with Donald Trump.

    Moron of the Moment – Prince Harry

    With his marriage to the woman formerly known as Meghan Markle, Prince Harry has morphed into an utter bore   Prince Harry used to be a...

    Scobie Orf!

    ‘MeGain’s’ bestie Omid Scobie deservedly gets slammed by ‘Yankee Wally’ Sadie Quinlan for getting her shut down on Twitter; this childish chap should now just ‘belt up, wrap up and shut up.’