Monday, August 2, 2021

Anth’ Swings into Hyde Park

Publicity loving Anthea Turner and policeman biter fiancé “giggled like teens” as they “hit the rides” at Winter Wonderland on Boxing Day

Like Tarzan in the jungle, ‘Princess Tippytoes’ Anthea Turner has swung into action yet again this Christmas.

 

With the MailOnline this morning somewhat laughably sharing news as a “PICTURE EXCLUSIVE” (and yes it plainly really did demand capitals) that ‘F**k I used to be famous’ had “hit the rides with terrified fiancé Mark Armstrong, 55, at Winter Wonderland,” anyone sane can only see that this woman in her fifties who “loves a shag” planted the images as part of her desperate campaign to remain in the public eye.

 

“We have a future together” Armstrong and “I haven’t given up on love” Turner – who on Monday patronsingly told the public what to eat at Christmas (chicken NOT turkey, no “gluttony” allowed) – according to the paper’s Leigh McManus, “giggled like a pair of teens” and “braved the winter chill in stylish fashion.” On one ride, the pair “swung high into the air” even.

 

Whilst “the woman who put the ug! in smug” “sported a splash of makeup” with a “casual up-do” hairstyle,” convicted police officer biter Armstrong was reported to look “bedraggled.” No mention, however, was made as to whether the duo partook in any Cadbury’s Flakes during the outing. Swing!

 

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