Saturday, April 27, 2024

Neighbours from Hell

As Priti Patel is slammed by her neighbours as a ‘snitch,’ the Duke and Duchess of Sussex are voted “the famous couple Brits would least like to live next door to” along with Boris Johnson and Kerry Katona

Priti Patel – a wicked wench whom dislikes “minglin” (could someone teach her to pronounce the missing ‘g’?) – was quite rightly slammed as a snake and a snitch earlier this week for stating she’d report her neighbours if they had gatherings of more than six.

 

With one of the very people living next door to her stating to the Guardian: “I would live and let live in the first place” and adding: “[The government has] made a pig’s ear of the while job” of the ‘rule of six,’ this ludicrous woman was deservedly told “there are more important things to worry about than dobbing in your neighbour.”

 

Patel, quite frankly, is a petulant pest nobody in their right mind would want to live in the proximity of, but even more amusingly The Sun reported the Duke and Duchess of Susex have been named “the worst neighbours” possible by Brits in a survey by the charity fundraising site Omaze.

 

Elsewhere, Business Times reported that “Harry and Markle’s neighbours in Montecito are ‘super annoyed’ about the deluge of paparazzi in their once peaceful town. According to TMZ, photographers and tabloid press reporters circle in helicopters around the neighborhood up to four times a day just to catch the Sussexes in public places.”

 

Others unsurprisingly hitting the Omaze list were Gemma Collins, Boris Johnson and Kerry Katona, but most surprisingly the woman whose cakes have made the nation chubby Mary Berry was listed amongst those people would actually like to live next door to. What on earth would they want from her? Free cakes?

 

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Matthew Steeples
Matthew Steeples
A graduate of the London School of Economics, Matthew Steeples is a writer and marketing consultant. He conceived The Steeple Times as a media arena to fill the void between the Mail Online, The Huffington Post and such organs as the New York Social Diary in 2012.

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