12.7 C
London
Sunday, September 27, 2020

Downton the Hatch!

As ‘Downton Abbey’ returns tonight, we raise a glass to its official unofficial drinking game

 

Downton Abbey, a show that many have mixed views about, returns tonight. The nation will no doubt be gripped and though we hope Julian Fellowes has ironed out the historical inaccuracies and corrected the strangely informal relations between the master and his servants, we bet it’ll be another success. In preparation, we share with you a game that you might wish to play in accompaniment from 9pm tonight named Downton the Hatch!

 

Some would argue that watching 'Downton Abbey' would drive anyone to drink
Some would argue that watching ‘Downton Abbey’ would drive anyone to drink

Even BAFTA have organised a quiz based on Downton the Hatch!
Even BAFTA have organised a quiz based on Downton the Hatch!

The rules are simple and initially suggested 26 occasions on which to down a measure whilst watching the drama series. They are:

 

  1. Drink whenever a bell rings.
  2. Drink whenever Robert is upset by something he reads in the paper.
  3. Drink whenever Mrs Patmore yells at Daisy.
  4. Drink anytime someone from upstairs appears downstairs.
  5. Take 2 drinks any time Anna somehow turns “Bates” into a two syllable word.
  6. Drink anytime anyone on the show drinks.
  7. Drink anytime Lady Mary raises her eyebrows and keep drinking until they are lowered to their natural position.
  8. Drink anytime the dog appears in a scene.
  9. Drink whenever Thomas smokes… evilly.
  10. Drink every time Maggie Smith f**king owns it.
  11. Toast and chug whenever anyone in the show says something negative about America or Americans.
  12. Drink whenever Thomas and O’Brien are plotting like Boris and Natasha.
  13. Drink and give a tip of the hat any time a character wears a ridiculous hat (also known as the “Hat Tip to Lady Mary’s Top Hat Rule”).
  14. Every time Branson says something political, stand up, hold your glass out in front of you and say, “VIVA LA REVOLUCIÓN!”
  15. Drink whenever Edith is a disappointment to the family.
  16. Drink when someone talks on the phone.
  17. Drink whenever the honour of Downton is at stake!
  18. Drink whenever you see a random servant whose name is never mentioned.
  19. Drink whenever someone is flabbergasted by a technological advancement.
  20. Drink any time we see some hanky-panky.
  21. Drink whenever Dr Clarkson misdiagnoses something.
  22. Pour yourself more wine each time Carson decants a wine bottle.
  23. Drink each time you question how O’Brien’s hair is even possible.
  24. Drink whenever anyone rides a bicycle.
  25. Pour one out for your homey when a character dies.
  26. Toast to Laura Linney.

 

A Twitter account devoted to the game has been created and even BAFTA ran a pub quiz based on it. Do try it at home but do so responsibly.

 

 

Subscribe to our free once daily email newsletter here:[wysija_form id=”1″]

1 COMMENT

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here

Most Popular

Drip & Draining Michael Jackson

IV drip and fluid bag that was “in the arms” of Michael Jackson on his deathbed sells at auction for an astounding sum.

Rotten Reeking Rolf Returns

As Rolf Harris is spotted pounding the pavements in soiled clothing, the public must be reminded that this paedo pest is still nothing but a mucky monster.

Bombshell Bill

“Bombshell revelation” about Bill Clinton dining with Ghislaine Maxwell after she was first accused is a signal he’s likely headed under the bus.

Stand Up Against Snitch O’Flock

Matthew Steeples condemns the government’s ludicrous new 10pm bar, pub and restaurant curfew and slams the snitch culture of the next likely lockdown.

A Highway Ponzi House

Montauk beach house built for Ponzi schemer Bernie Madoff resurfaces for sale for double what U.S. Marshalls got for it in 2009; its price seems crazy given it could be washed away by erosion.

A Socially Distanced Showcase

An invitation from businesswoman Heather Bird Tchenguiz to a socially distanced ‘by appointment’ exhibition of the works of William Cookson in Knightsbridge this September.

Ban the InstaKiller

Wolf slaying ‘InstaKiller’ Larysa Switlyk disgracefully remains on Instagram in spite of campaign to remove her going viral on Change.org

The Collapse of The Clown

Despite all of Dominic Cummings’ efforts Boris Johnson is morphing into the most miserable Prime Minister of modern times; how much longer will the blubbering buffoon ‘Bosie The Clown’ last?

Escaping the Dick

That an escaped prisoner couldn’t get himself rearrested in spite of willingly handing himself into the Met Police seven times is ludicrous; Cressida Dick should take responsibility and resign

Coming up for Ayr

‘The Steeple Times’ analyses the top picks for today’s Ayr Gold Cup Handicap and opts for a tidy priced 28/1 option.

Neighbours from Hell

As Priti Patel is slammed by her neighbours as a ‘snitch,’ the Duke and Duchess of Sussex are voted “the famous couple Brits would least like to live next door to” along with Boris Johnson and Kerry Katona.

The Distraction of Christian B

As Christian Brueckner’s lawyer highlights that German police have found no link to ‘disappearance’ of Madeleine McCann, we suggest distraction technique is ‘in play.’

Mother Maxwell

Matthew Steeples suggests Jeffrey Epstein treated Ghislaine Maxwell like a “mother figure.”

Phillip Schofield – What a Plonker!

All-round plonker Phillip Schofield’s wine range condemned as “only fit for the bin” and “no more palatable than fizzy Ribena;” it looks like his “sh*tty offering” might go the same way as that sold by Sir Cliff Richard.

Is Now a Good Time?

As Britain likely moves into further lockdowns, drug dealers are changing the way they operate and communicate; they now bizarrely demand customers ask: “Is now a good time?”

Five of the Worst – Undesirable Homes Currently For Sale

‘The Steeple Times’ selects five undesirable homes currently for sale that many would say would remain best avoided; they’ve all been in the news and they’re all connected to infamous names.

Weather Now

London
overcast clouds
12.7 ° C
13.9 °
11.7 °
71 %
5.7kmh
90 %
Sun
14 °
Mon
18 °
Tue
19 °
Wed
17 °
Thu
15 °