Extending to 3,632 square foot in total and on a plot of just under an acre, 221 Poplar Street is marketed by agents Carousel Realty as “gorgeous” and built in 1910. It was last sold in 2008 for just £42,900 ($60,000) and this time comes with “all furniture and antique furniture.”
Very much having the appearance of a ‘bargain basement budget’ version of “frankly my dear” Rhett Butler’s mansion in the 1939 movie adaptation of Margaret Mitchell’s 1936 novel, 221 Poplar Street’s wrap-around-porch has most definitely got ‘Marmite-like’ qualities. Of it, on Facebook, one commentator remarked: “It looks like a house in a cage” whilst another concluded: “I just love it.”
Situated in the Lake County area, where the militant ‘Night Riders of Reelfoot Lake’ tobacco farmers took on the monopolistic American Tobacco Company in the early 1900s and where between 1877 and 1950 thirteen black people were tragically lynched, the population makeup of the locality according to the 2000 census was 67% white and 31% black or African American.
Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – ‘Gone with the Wind’ was written by Margaret Mitchell in 1936. The fictional plantation house it centred upon, ‘Tara’, was of the antebellum style and in the novel was not nearly as palatial as the one depicted in the 1939 movie of the same name.
The Public’s Take…
“Is this the house from Dallas?”
“Looks like a mortuary.”
“Looks like a houseboat.”
“Looks like the Flying Nun!”
“Looks like a house in a cage.”
“Looks like Amazon just delivered it.”
“Reminds me of a ‘Tara’ recreation, circa 1960s-1970s.”
“Is there an actual house in there somewhere or is it just a porch?”
“What’s with the flat roof? You could land a helicopter on that thing.”
“That veranda is a bit much.”
“Does it come with the dog statue?”
“Can they still advertise antebellum [in the new ‘woke’ age]?”
“Poor photography. This is what happens when a realtor uses their phone for photos.”
The Numbers – 221 Poplar Street, Ridgely, Lake County, Tennessee, TN 38080, United States of America
March 2021 – For sale for £128,700 ($179,900, €150,100 or درهم660,700) or the equivalent of £36 per square foot ($50, €42 or درهم184 per square foot). Offered by realtor Karen Paschall of Carousel Realty of Dyer County at a sum 200% more than the December 2008 sale price.
December 2008 – Sold for £42,900 ($60,000, €50,000 or درهم220,400) or the equivalent of £12 per square foot ($17, €14 or درهم62 per square foot).
Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – The entrance hall to the property is somewhat plain. It could be a dentist’s waiting room area, in fact, though the faux bulldog adds a comedy touch.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – This “formal living room” has the look of more like something from the 1980s BBC comedy series ‘Last of the Summer Wine’ than the elegance of ‘Gone with the Wind.’ The crappy coffee table, doily pelmeting and fake flower arrangements mixed with an oversized telly box are anything but classy.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – The dining room is somewhat plainer in its styling.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – A mural on the wall is surprisingly classy. It’s not quite de Gournay, but it’s certainly far from objectionable. The chandelier, on the other hand, most certainly belongs in a skip.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – Another entertaining area complete with yet more fake shrubbery.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – The kitchen is basic but functional.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – One of four bedrooms. This one’s curtains, cushions and accompaniments have been carefully coordinated.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – Another is a little more ‘Holiday Inn on an expense account-esque.’Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – A more flattering view of the building from the side. If only they’d watered the lawn.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – From the side, the setting looks somewhat neglected.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – There is a three car garage.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – In addition, the 0.96 acre plot features an outbuilding also.Gone with the Wind (on a Bargain Basement Budget) – Two adjoining plots of land come as part of the property and the selling agents declare: “All furniture and antique furniture stays with the property.”
Change.org petition started by ‘The Steeple Times’ seeking to ban giraffe slaying monster Merelize van der Merwe from Facebook goes viral with over 4,000 signatures in less than 24 hours
After we picked up on the story of a monster named Merelize van der Merwe massacring a giraffe and then posing with its heart, it went viral. In the last 24 hours, this heartless horror has appeared in The Sun, the Daily Mail and the Independent and seizing upon this The Steeple Times started a petition to seek to persuade Facebook to ban her.
Posted on Change.org, our petition reads:
Merelize van der Merwe (@Merelizevdm) has 80,600 likes and 97,700 followers on Facebook.
On her “public figure” page, this monster shares images of the endangered species she massacres. Amongst them are giraffes, elephants and leopards.
She also shares imagery and videos of herself covered in blood, of dead children and her and her fellow barbarians chopping up their victims.
Why does Facebook, a supposed site with family values, allow this? Instead, they should do the decent thing: Ban her.
Today, we ask that our readers come together to sign this to help put a stop to this vile woman’s celebration of slaying and slaughter. A previous petition started 4 years ago gained just 457 supporters and was closed; ours, started less than 24 hours ago, already has over 4,000 and has gone viral.
Join the 4,000+ individuals who’ve signed our Change.org petition to get the giraffe slaughterer Merelize van der Merwe banned from Facebook by clicking here.
Ban Merelize van der Merwe from Facebook in 2021 – Merelize van der Merwe reacted to our petition by sharing it on Facebook and arrogantly declared: “Thought I’ll help their small-minded cause a bit.” 4,000 people reacted by signing in less than 24 hours, so plainly this deranged deviant has not got as many supporters as she imagined.Ban Merelize van der Merwe from Facebook in 2021 – Whilst this wicked wastrel thinks it acceptable to share imagery of the heart of a giraffe she slayed on Facebook, one has to ask: “Why have they not removed it?” Ban Merelize van der Merwe from Facebook in 2021 – In a post on 6th June 2020, this plainly clinically insane nutcase posed with the blood of something she’d killed all over her face. One has to ask: “Is this something that Facebook should be encouraging?”Ban Merelize van der Merwe from Facebook in 2021 – Merelize van der Merwe is a prolific sharer of offensive content on Facebook. Aside from her gruesome celebration of animal slaying, she shared graphic pictures of a dead child that she “claimed” was killed by a lion in May 2020 as part of her attempt to justify her massacring such creatures. How is it right that such is allowed on a site such as Facebook? It is time for them to ban her.Ban Merelize van der Merwe from Facebook in 2021 – To justify her sick self, van der Merwe included another photo of the supposed victim and claimed the lion to be responsible for the “brutal” attack. One of her equally vile fans, Jim Martin, tartly responded: “Sorry about the youngster.”
Odds of Tory twerp Shaun Bailey becoming Mayor of London in 2021 unsurprisingly sink to 45/1
Banger-on about being the son of a bus driver Sadiq Khan has without a question of doubt been a totally useless Mayor of London, but the prospects of his Tory rival beating him have now sunk to 45/1 from 29/1 last week.
Whilst Khan will go down in history for increasing the congestion charge at a time when the public would be safer in private cars than on pandemic spreading public transport, the result of batshit bonkers Bailey’s strange and frankly stupid policy ideas are most definitely the reason that he has fallen into third place behind the equally awful Brian Rose.
Aside from halfwittedly claiming homeless people can and should save £5,000 to get a home, Bailey’s pointless pledge to give away 300,000 pointless screeching (and likely to be completely ignored) burglar alarms has been deservedly condemned as “utterly ludicrous.”
Equally, this warbling wazzock’s bigotry has plainly come home to roost with a reminder of his comments in 2005 about “accommodating Muslims and Hindus” in the UK “robbing Britain of its community.” Given the 2011 census revealed that 40.2% of London’s population to be non-white, one can see why such offensive remarks will hamper his already hapless campaign
The best thing now for Bailey? Quit the Titanic before the iceberg hits.
Stupid Shaun Bailey SINKS to 45/1 – In January 2019, ‘The Red Roar’ reported Bailey was forced to return donations to his campaign from an an “impermissible donor” linked to the Paradise Papers scandal.
Stupid Shaun Bailey SINKS to 45/1 – Who’s more stupid Shaun Bailey or Owen Jones? During a 16:29 minute YouTube feature in May 2019, Bailey declared: “Nobody has a monopoly on common sense,” but then went on to prove he’s totally lacking in even an ounce of such.
Alleged shoplifter and ‘modern day Dorian Gray’ Richard Madeley attempts to convince ‘Mirror’ readers that his relationship with alleged old soak ‘mummy’ Judy Finnigan is “normal”
In a feature titled “Richard Madeley and Judy Finnigan’s heartbreaks – affair, baby loss and health battles” by ‘showbiz features writer’ Frances Kindon, no mention was made of Madeley’s possible penchant for helping himself in supermarkets, but instead the focus was on how the couple first met.
Of an epic encounter that led to “the most solid union in showbiz,” Kindon gloriously remarked: “Their paths first crossed in a newsroom back in 1982 when Judy, 72, was asked to mentor a younger Richard, 64, and greeted him with the words, ‘Hello… I’m your Mummy’” before then adding that their own daughter finds “the amount of time they spend together is not normal.”
Elsewhere in the puff piece, Kindon reveled in ‘Dick and Dude’s’ “natural chemistry” and celebrated their “whole lot of red-hot chemistry” and positions as “the nation’s favourites.” She referenced “hurtful rumours” about them and then even allowed “sexual oversharer” Madeley to give a riposte. In it, he remarked:
“We’d gone away for a week to Cornwall with our children, and the mobile went in the car.”
“It was our bosses at Granada saying a terrible rumour was being put around that you’re in a self-help institution for men who batter their wives because you’ve beaten Judy, that Judy’s in a drying-out clinic and that the children are in care. We were in the f**king car.”
“We tracked it to the source… A particularly poisonous person. He’d leaked these smears and they were never published because we would have cleaned up in a libel case. But the one thing that lingered like a piece of floating sewage is this thing that Judy drinks. And she doesn’t.”
“I know what it’s like to be wronged by the press. I was once accused of shoplifting. Unlike you though, I knew I was innocent.”
Of women
“I’ve never met a single woman who’s happy with the way she looks, except Jordan, although I’ve never met her.”
On elephants
“So, are you telling me elephants are not born evil?”
To a man crying after paramedics saved his life
“Stop crying! This is supposed to make you happy! Anyway after the break, the biggest dog in the UK. And he really is big. Don’t miss it!”
Of old women skipping
“There’s not many better things than seeing an older woman skipping.”
Of wanting to be black
“I hope when I’m reincarnated I come back black because you age better.”
To Keira Knightley
“Can we get some make up please, get Keira looking like a crack whore, she’d make a good crack whore.”
Of an autistic teenager
“The thing with Daniel [Wakeford, a ‘star’ on Channel 4’s Undateables] is, he has autism but is very intelligent and as we can see extremely talented. Has Daniel always been autistic?”
To a caller
“I understand you have a little lad of 12. Is it a boy or a girl?”
Modest Madeley (And ‘Mummy’ Finnigan) – Judy Finnigan is best known for quaffing, flashing her boobs and falling off sofas. In October 2014, she inexcusably defended footballer turned convicted rapist by saying: “The rape wasn’t violent… He didn’t cause any bodily harm to the person.” Of his victim, she hypocritically then added: “She had far too much to drink.”
Modest Madeley (And ‘Mummy’ Finnigan) – Whilst ‘Dorian Gray-esque’ Richard Madeley is best known for helping himself to champagne in supermarkets, his wife Judy Finnigan will be forever remembered for flashing at an awards ceremony in 2000.
“Gaunt” looking Katie Hopkins joins UKIP in time for its next (of many) leadership contests and is “spotted lurking” in Washington in spite of unsurprisingly being ‘NFI’d’ to Joe Biden’s inauguration
“Permanently suspended” from Twitter but astonishingly still allowed on Instagram (where she presents herself as “The Biggest Bitch in Britain”) Katie Hopkins was unsurprisingly ‘Not F**king Invited’ to Joe Biden’s inauguration. She decided to turn up to “lurk” anyway.
Subsequently, in a video rant yesterday, one-time “shagger-of-someone-else’s-husband-in-a-field” Hopkins declared that she’d run into Emily Maitlis in Washington and blabbered on about how the BBC presenter was a hypocrite for traveling there. She neglected, however, to explain why her own presence was necessary and yet again just made a total berk of her not-so-sorry self.
Continuing elsewhere, the political party that is more widely considered nothing but a train wreck that is UKIP last week tweeted that it is still “alive and kicking as Britain’s voice of common sense.” With this post, the ragbag of racists shared an image of a megaphone and Katie Hopkins and added: “We are pleased to welcome Katie Hopkins to UKIP!” Now there’s one welcome bash nobody in their right mind will have a desire to break lockdown to attend.
Some of Katie Hopkins’ most outrageous moments:
On people with dementia:
“Dementia sufferers should not be blocking beds. What is the point of life when you no longer know you are living it?”
On Ramadan:
“Ramadan typically brings a spike in violence in Middle East. I get grumpy when I don’t eat – but I don’t blow things up. Religion of peace?”
On ginger haired children:
“Ginger babies. Like a baby. Just so much harder to love.”
On ‘Highgella’ Nigella Lawson:
“A self-confessed drug-taker, spendthrift, and a self-obsessed flirt determined to show other women they were imperfect.”
On tourists stranded in Egypt after the bombing of a Russian airplane:
“I think if you are going to take your children out from school, which is ridiculous in itself, stick them in a destination that is dangerous, don’t be complaining on my television that you’ve been delayed at the airport, don’t be complaining that you don’t have any information, and don’t be coming back acting like you are a refugee from a war-torn country.”
On Jewish politician Ed Miliband’s wife:
“Pollsters say Justine [Miliband] is the least popular of the party wives. He might stick her head in the oven and turn on the gas.”
On refugees:
“Make no mistake, these migrants are like cockroaches. They might look a bit ‘Bob Geldof’s Ethiopia circa 1984,’ but they are built to survive a nuclear bomb. They are survivors.”
On obesity:
“I don’t really like fat people… Would I employ you if you were obese? No, I would not… If you are obese, you look lazy.”
On suicidal prisoners:
“They should just kill themselves.”
UKIP, currently with ex-Conservative MP Neil Hamilton as its “interim party leader,” has had 13 leaders and acting leaders since 2010. From October 2019 until April 2020, “prized pillock” Pat Mountain was in charge and she was followed by an Indian businessman “who once listed Nazi Germany as a hobby on his CV” named Freddy Vachha. He was suspended from the party in September 2020 (though “maintains he is still the leader”) and, for now, Pat Mountain is “serving” as UKIP’s “abuse and exploitation spokeswoman” in spite of most likely not have the foggiest what that quite means.
Katie UKIPpers – Last year, Hopkins was flown to Prague and given a spoof award for being the ‘C*NT of the Year.’ In accepting it, she proved that she is anything but as bright as a button and now news that she’s considering standing to become UKIP leader will be met with nothing but laughter. Of the possibility, she remarked: “People always ask me when am I going to get into politics, when am I going to do something smarter than just gob off on social media. But I do see that the time for just being on social media and just having opinions is wearing thin and is probably time for somebody like myself, who is at the pointy end of the spear most of the time, to make more of a formalised stand.”
“International magician” Mike Alan goes mental with a cucumber after alleging a “razor sharp” M&S shelf “savaged” his coat and left him “looking like a snowman”
At a time when 13,000 families are worrying about ending up in penury thanks to retail rotter ‘Sir Shifty’ Philip Green’s empire collapsing, there’s one very, very angry man with bigger issues to fry with the sinking high street shopping sector.
Featured for “crying to the papers” first via the Facebook group ‘Angry People in Local Newspapers,’ an “international magician” named Mike Alan – a man mocked as the type that “shops in M&S but cuts a Lidl version of Richard O’Brien” – claims to have paid £75 for a coat that one commentator described simply as “I’ve seen nicer jackets on hot water tanks.”
Aptly ‘Digusted of Tunbridge Wells’ (and yes, Mr Alan just had to be from Tunbridge Wells) moaned to KentLive’s multimedia journalist John James that he was left “seething” after an encounter with a shelf in the spa town’s Calverly Road Marks & Spencer store.
Of the calamitous incident, Mr Alan – whom claims to have performed for both the Queen and the Sultan of Brunei – explained:
“I went into the store like I do most days. I don’t have a problem with the shop or the staff themselves, they’re very polite. I go to look at a tin of biscuits and as I pull them off the shelf it rips my coat.”
“I went to the desk and asked to speak to a manager and they said they didn’t have one on shift at the moment, I said ‘What are you? A corner shop?’”
“By this point I looked like a snowman walking around with all the feathers coming out of my coat. I was told to call up head office.”
Wally of the Week – Mike Alan – Especially for ‘Kent Live’ readers, “as seen on TV” Mr Alan shared an image of the damage he did to a cucumber with the offending shelf. He did not declare whether he paid for said vine plant fruit.
Continuing of his subsequent lengthy less than magical correspondence with the retailer, Mr Alan – a man plainly lacking a Debbie McGee to do his biscuit buying – then angrily added:
“They’ve denied it’s sharp, so yesterday I went back in there and cut one of their cucumbers with the shelf. And they still say it’s not sharp. It’s like a razor!”
“All I’m after is for them to own up to it and give me £50 for the coat, which I’d give to a homeless charity so they could buy a coat.”
“I’m just really annoyed with their attitude. I’ve not been going in there since the incident. I’ve sent an invoice to them, I’m going to charge them for every email I send them.”
“The shelf is sharp and it’s at the same height as a child’s face. It’s a joke.”
Plainly sick of this moaning Minnie, an M&S spokesman responded: “We are giving him a gesture of goodwill to cover the cost of his coat.” Magic that, Mike.
Pictured top: Mike Alan displays his “savaged” coat for the benefit of readers of ‘Kent Live’ (left); previous encounters with retailers including Sports Direct feature on his Facebook page.
Wally of the Week – Mike Alan – ‘Angry People in Local Newspapers’ members had a field day with Mr Alan subsequently. “It’s not just any savaging. It’s an M&S shelf savaging,” remarked one Michael Burke.Wally of the Week – Mike Alan – “This is a proper Quentin Tarantino film in the making” added a ‘top fan’ named Marcus Marr. Another ‘top fan,’ Cath Dodge, added: “Wearing a natty hat does not make you a magician, mate,” whilst one Danny Beattie observed: “I know what has a problem, and it’s not the shelf!”Wally of the Week – Mike Alan – “That shelf could have cut a woman in half… and that’s my job!” mocked one Jim MacNee.
Derbyshire Police yet again show themselves inept at the art of public relations in tweeting about trying to locate a man who kissed a woman on the cheek to thank her for helping him with his lorry
The “busybodies” of Derbyshire Police will forever be remembered as the dunces of the 2020 coronavirus lockdown.
In a post shared on their own website and online via social media also on Friday, the plainly inept manager of communications for this force shared an appeal. Its wording was beyond weak and its content laughable. The text read:
We are appealing for help to identify a man who kissed a woman on the cheek to thank her for helping when his lorry became stuck under a low bridge.
The incident occurred between 12pm and 4pm on Tuesday, 28 April, in Dale Road, Matlock.
The heavy goods vehicle had become stuck and the woman, who is in her 70s, helped the men to ensure the lorry did not hit the bridge.
After the lorry became unstuck one of the men in the lorry left the vehicle, thanked the woman and kissed her on the cheek.
Officers want to speak to anyone who was in the area at time and may be able to help our enquiries into the incident – of particular interest are any drivers who were in the area at the time and may have captured the lorry on dashcam.
Anyone with any information is asked to contact Derbyshire police.
Slammed previously by amongst others Lord Sumption for their “hysteria” during lockdown, Derbyshire Police subsequently were inundated by Twitter users astounded that this ‘matter’ was being shared publicly.
In response, the force’s Twitter manager announced: “This would be classed as a sexual assault as the woman did not want the man to kiss her on the cheek… We’d just like to identify and speak to the man we’ve described at this moment in time.”
Without explaining how a kiss could have lasted from 12pm to 4pm and whether they’d caught the lorry driver who likes to thank with a kiss, Derbyshire Police subsequently deleted their original tweet about the matter. They did not, however, manage to delete the thousands of outraged and mocking responses.
Pictured top: A young man kissing and an older woman. We cannot confirm whether or not the young man in the image committed a crime or not or whether the older of the pair was a willing participant.
The ‘kiss’ occurred within a window of a four-hour time period on Dale Road, Matlock, Derbyshire in the vicinity of this bridge allegedly. Derbyshire Police’s appeal was issued on their website (left) and online via Twitter (right) also.In response to mockery and outrage from Twitter users, the force used their own account to attempt to justify their actions. Their strategy was subsequently met with further derision.
Jonathan Downey, owner of London’s Milk & Honey bar, takes to social media to share news he won’t be reopening without a rent holiday; it is likely he is set to head a wave of similar announcements
Just as happened to venues like Keith McNally’s Lucky Strike in New York, a wave – perhaps, excuse the pun, even a flood – of closures of bars and restaurants is likely coming in London and across the rest of the UK. As a result of coronavirus most recently and due also to landlord’s charging extortionate rents and council’s levying excessive business rates in the years prior, we could soon sadly end up with far ‘drier’ high streets.
On Wednesday night on Facebook, in an impassioned plea, the owner of the Soho institution that is Milk & Honey – a “prohibition-style speakeasy cocktail bar” where ‘house rules’ include: “Gentlemen will remove their hats. Hooks are provided. Gentlemen will not introduce themselves to ladies. Ladies, feel free to start a conversation or ask the bartender to introduce you. If a man you don’t know speaks to you, please lift your chin slightly and ignore him” – Jonathan Downey shared news that post the coronavirus lockdown ending, his venue might “never reopen.”
In his post, multiple venue owner-operator Mr Downey stated:
This is Milk & Honey in Soho. A very special place that was 18yrs old last week. It’s been the ‘World’s Best Bar’ (a few times) and the making of so many great bartenders, but we may never re-open. Our annual rent is £210,000 but, despite the current closure and no hope of re-opening for months, our landlord won’t allow any deferral or rent free. He expects payments to be made upfront. He’s got no chance.
One of three things will happen (in most likely first order):
– We give the keys back.
– We get a 9 month #NationalRentFree and re-open paying rent for another 18yrs.
– The landlord backs down/sees sense.
I’ve written back to our landlord. I don’t expect we’ll get anywhere and without a #NationalTimeOut, we won’t be able to re-open Milk & Honey. Including VAT, we’ve paid more than £3.9m rent in 18yrs.
Going further, Downey shared the letter he’d written to his landlord. It read:
We won’t be paying any rent on this site again this year. I’m sorry but you’re kidding yourselves if you think otherwise. We have no income.
We have been paying rent there for 18 years, totaling in excess of £3m. We have no idea when we may be allowed to re-open. Even when we are allowed to re-open, we won’t because fear of the virus and physical distancing will mean we will be loss-making. The best (and possibly only) time we can expect to re-open is once a vaccine becomes widely available. Until then, zero income = zero rent.
I have been campaigning for a #NationalTimeOut for tenants and landlords, which includes a 9 month #NationalRentFree. If we get this, then there may be a way through for all of us. Otherwise, we’ll be giving back the keys and surrendering the very valuable 03:00 licence.
I am happy to discuss if you want but that’s our position and we don’t have any other.
Jonathan Downey (right) shared his sentiments on the future of the bar he set up in 2002, Milk & Honey, 61 Poland Street, Soho, London, W1F 7NU in a Facebook post on Wednesday.Mr Downey also published the text of a letter he had sent to his plainly thus far unsympathetic landlord.
Previously, in an interview with The Caterer earlier this month, Downey commented:
The best thing for most people in our industry is a National Time Out – nine months rent-free, with a matching debt repayment holiday for our landlords. Understandably the pubcos don’t like it, but it is being supported by UKHospitality.
We can’t each negotiate 150,000 separate agreements with landlords. We need a national arrangement that everybody falls in line with, that the government decides and legislates on.
We should get the rest of this year rent-free – for most businesses it’s the biggest single cost apart from staff – and extend loan terms for landlords, because if they can’t get their rent for nine months, they can’t repay the debt for the premises. If they have borrowed, they should get a nine-month repayment break. It should be pushed back onto the banks – they can handle nine months of not having loans repaid.
Of the longer-term, he added:
I don’t see anybody doing well. Nobody will do well out of the crisis. I think there will be even more empty high street sites. My next business will probably have to be something outside the hospitality industry. Certainly, the business I’m in – large-capacity venues – I don’t see coming back until there’s a vaccine, which is a year or maybe 18 months away. Maybe I’ll take a year off and come back in the way that music festivals will have to. We needed a shake-up as an industry, but we didn’t need one so brutal.
That, to a large extent, the business model of a lot of hospitality businesses is hopelessly flawed. It’s ridiculously fragile, the margins are far too slim and it’s just not sustainable. We were fucked after 10 days to two weeks of no and low income.
I think there’s going to be a lot of reflection and soul-searching and realising that, despite these brilliant things we do as individuals and businesses, if the business model doesn’t stack up, you’ve got to find another way or find something else to do.
We can’t pay people what we need to pay them, we can’t pay the rent, we can’t deal with business rates at this level and with VAT at 20%. It’s just insane. Everybody wants something for nothing. In hospitality we always try to deliver, but this has made us realise we can’t deliver the impossible or the unsustainable.
Since its inception, The Steeple Times has advocated the premise of ‘use it or lose it’ for bars and restaurants and today we join Jonathan Downey in calling for #NationalRentFree and #NationalTimeOut. Now, we must all unite in coming together to support our favourite establishments as otherwise, just like many of us found with the closure of the very much missed La Brasserie in South Kensington in March 2017, we’ll again be left crying into our caipirinhas with nowhere to go.
‘The Steeple Times’ asks readers to name the brilliantly batshit bonkers bird spotted gyrating in front of Chelsea shop windows during the coronavirus lockdown
Spotted on both the Fulham Road and Kings in Chelsea in recent days, a sometimes lycra-clad lady has been spotted by beady eyed readers gyrating in the glistening windows of empty shops. In days of old, we had ‘Widow Twanky’ and in days of coronavirus lockdown, we’ve got ‘Window Twerky.’
Presumably using said elevations as the mirror in which she can celebrate her very own maniac moves, little else is known about this non-conformist. Today, therefore, we ask anyone in the know to send in this wonderfully wacky woman’s name. We would like to contact her and push her forward to Simon Cowell for an audition as he will undoubtedly join in giving an almighty ‘YES!’
The Steeple Times joins those suggesting that this wacky wonder deserves wider public accolade and also a thank you for bringing joy to all who’ve witnessed her Fifty Shadesof Crazy antics during this Strictly insane time. Bring on yet more batshit bonkers as, after all, that’s what the Kings Road was always meant to be all about.
Rock on ‘Window Twerky’ – Your nation needs you!
With thanks to Claire Rubinstein and Tom Griffiths for first sharing ‘Window Twerky’ at-work on their Instagram stories.
Mayor of London candidate Shaun Bailey’s policy of giving out burglar alarm to 300,000 homes is utterly ludicrous
Burglar and car alarms are certainly amongst the most pointless inventions in history. Generally ignored, they annoy those in their vicinity and never seem to work when they’re actually required.
Now, first reported in the blog From The Hornets Nest, “man of gimmicks” Shaun Bailey – the Conservative candidate for Mayor of London – has decided to “give” burglar alarms to every Londoner aged over 65.
In a video shared on Twitter, Bailey announced his policy but did not cite any evidence as to why it would actually be effective. He remarked:
“What I am suggesting I will do is to give free burglar alarms to people aged over 65. They are the most vulnerable people in our communities and they need this protection and there’s the other end of this conversation as well. It makes burglary harder and what that does is reduce the amount of people who become career burglars.”
Patronisingly, this foolish man with pockets plainly as large as China then added:
“Of course if you really have one or you feel that you can buy your own one, please do go ahead. But you are talking about 200,000 to 300,000 Londoners who really need that support.”
As From The Hornets Nest rightly points out, “the millions he proposes to spend [would be] better deployed on replacing ‘on the streets’ police removed whilst he was ‘advising’ [David] Cameron on crime.”
