Tag: Conservative

Moron of the Moment 2021 – Karren Brady

Poundland muckspreader Karren Brady desperately seeks attention by bleating that men are “sexist” against her; Lady Brady brought up a story from years ago proving she has utterly nothing new to say

“The arrogant, self-interested baroness,” “gutter gossip hack” and “all-round nasty piece of work” are just some of the descriptions that have deservedly stuck to Karren Brady (AKA The Right Honourable The Baroness Brady of Knightsbridge in the City of Westminster CBE) over the years.

Also widely mocked for her links to “dildo floggers” and as “Mrs Blowjob or No Job,” Brady used her column in today’s The Sun on Sunday to yet again moan about people making “jibes” against her.

Referencing an alleged incident long ago with Sky News’ football anchorman Richard Keys, Brady bleated to readers:

He was later overheard talking about me when he thought the microphone was off.

He said: “See charming Karren Brady this morning complaining about sexism? Yeah. Do me a favour, love.”

How condescending is that? Needless to say, I have never forgotten it. And I doubt I ever will.

In the case of this acid-tongued harpy, nothing other than stones and glass houses come to mind. Now, please, Karren, just do us all a favour and put a sock in it in 2021.

“Overpainted Aunt Sally” Karren Brady on…

Her destroyer of jobs and the high street mate ‘Sir Shifty’ Philip Green…

“The most dynamic, the most energetic, the most relentless business-person I have ever come across, a whirlwind of energy and ideas.”

The nearly as controversial businessman Mike Ashley:

“I feel sorry for a guy like Mike Ashley… He tried his best… I feel tremendous sympathy for Ashley.”

Her “precarious work-life balance”…

“[It’s a] balancing act… [I feel] constant guilt over being a working mother.”

Her being investigated in connection with corruption in football…

“I was in a very dark place… It was gut-wrenching… I didn’t want to have to justify myself to people.”

The East End of London…

“A hotbed of racism.”

Condoms in the Birmingham City boardroom…

“I found it floating in the toilet… And it became this big whodunit. I mean, in the boardroom toilet of all places.”

Her “wickedly indiscreet newspaper column”…

“It’s what I leave out that would make your hair curl.”

Unsurprisingly getting abuse given her own vile tongue…

“The abuse I get is vile. And so much worse now than it’s ever been.”

Herself…

“At 23, I had skin as thick as a rhino… I don’t have any fears.”

“I dare to put my head above the parapet, to have a mind and a voice of my own and to plough my own furrow.”

“[I am now] one of the most highly sought-after motivational speakers in the world.”

More modest than the late Mother Theresa, one is simply left asking: “What on earth was it about the very wealthy woman Karren Brady that David Cameron saw fit to elevate her to the House of Lords?”

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In 2016, Duncan Bannantyne described Karren Brady as a “nasty piece of trash” and “a complete coward” after she penned a column describing him as “hilariously repulsive.” Here, this mouthy muckspreader is pictured with her disgraced bestie Sir Philip Green.

It was ludicrously announced that plain old Karren Rita Brady would be given a seat as a Conservative life peer on the House of Lords on the 8th August 2014. She had previously addressed the Conservative Party Conference in Manchester on 30th September 2013.

As this banner proves, football fans loathe her and on 6th June 2020, in yet another column in ‘The Sun on Sunday’ Karren Brady banged on about ‘missing’ Madeleine McCann before turning to sharing her bizarre belief that Big Macs are brilliant. If ever there’s been a columnist with a better ability to choose interlinking subjects, we’d argue that it was time the world was told.

January 10, 2021
Lockup Lunacy

Matthew Steeples condemns the government’s slapdash decision to lockup Britain (other than estate agents) once again as ludicrous

The government’s brutal decision to lockup the British population once again will bankrupt yet more businesses and wreck many more lives and for no good reason.

Whilst new cases and deaths have risen in recent weeks, the new strategy of, for example, bizarrely allowing potentially diseased estate agents to continue to tour multiple houses with their potentially diseased clients and potentially thus spread disease – probably as a result of the property industry being responsible for a quarter of all donations to the Tory party – yet closing virtually every other “non-essential” commercial operation is simply crackers.

Here, in a country that will now allow takeaway food but has banned takeaway alcohol, previous lockup-lockdown’s have taken away our civil liberties but have not been proven to stop the spread of coronavirus. In response, what are this incompetent, inept rudderless government now doing? They’ve decided not to find another solution, but instead opted to just hit repeat.

Now, at a time of year when many deaths are actually being caused by pneumonia yet this year are being pinned with “caused by coronavirus” to suit the government’s all over the bloody place strategy-less-strategy, Boris Johnson has finally gone too far with his one-rule for one sector and one-rule for the rest.

Depression will soar in this dark lockup and businesses (other than estate agents) will go bust and before the end of it, where will we likely be? In a position no better than where we are now. Shame on ‘Bosie The Clown’ and shame on his puppet mistress ‘Carrie Not On Regardless’ and her controlling cronies.

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January 5, 2021
Pampered Peers Prattle About Avocados

Avocados and a “lack of British chefs in the kitchens” get the goat of out-of-touch British peers just as Norman Fowler calls for their numbers to be cut

This morning, the Mirror revealed that “pampered peers” in the House of Lords have spent 2020 complaining about the quality of avocados just as, in a year when the country teeters on bankruptcy, the taxpayer has propped up their loss-making dining rooms and bars to the tune of nearly £2 million in subsidies.

Of this news, at a time when Marcus Rashford has shamed the government over its meanness towards providing free meals for poor school children, Liberal Democrat Home Affairs spokesman Alistair Carmichael told the paper:

“Boris Johnson stuffing the House of Lords with his dodgy mates is clearly having its effect.”

“Instead of playing at Downton Abbey, these peers should be looking beyond their own dinner plate and address the real problems people across the country are facing.

Shockingly paid £305 plus travel expenses for each and every day they attend, yet charged just £3.70 for a full English breakfast, peers also “griped” about the halting of the sale of alcohol of the Parliamentary Estate due to coronavirus restrictions. One even whinged that “there were not enough British chefs in the kitchens.”

Elsewhere, last week, Lord Fowler, the lord speaker of the House of Lords, quite rightly argued in the Guardian that “there are too many lords” and remarked on Boris Johnson adding another 52 peers during 2020.

He questioned the sense of the resulting total number of 830 – “despite a cross-party agreement three years ago that numbers should over time be reduced to 600” – and questioned the fact the Lords is almost 200 larger in number than the Commons “and far in excess of what needed to transact its business.”

Going further and wading into the row over the disgraceful appointment of the “cash-for-access” tainted Tory donor Peter Cruddas by Johnson “in defiance of advice from the Lords Appointments Commission,” Fowler remarked:

“As we have just seen, its recommendations can be overridden by No 10. The result is that a prime minister has the power on his or her own to add peers to a house of parliament that can make and, within limits, unmake laws. Is this what the public expect in the third decade of the 21st century?”

“When making appointments it has become obvious that governments wish to avoid parliamentary scrutiny. Both of the initial announcements of new peerages in the last 12 months have been made when parliament has not been sitting. It simply adds to the impression that the choice of peers is the exclusive preserve of No 10 – and the less publicity the better. This may be fine for the government’s public relations team: whether it is fine for parliament is another matter.”

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Pampered Peers Prattle About Avocados –In March 2015, ‘The Steeple Times’ reported that “peers had complained about being left ‘scarred’ after having had their dinner bookings cancelled and were angered by the size of the menus, ‘chaotic’ table layouts and ‘inferior cappuccinos.’”

Pampered Peers Prattle About Avocados – Norman Fowler, Baron Fowler PC is quite right to call for reform of the House of Lords. A 2017 “analysis of voting, speaking and expenses records in the Lords, [showed a] ‘something for nothing culture among peers” by the Electoral Reform Society astonishingly revealed “115 Lords – one in seven of the total – failed to speak at all in the 2016/17 session, despite claiming an average of £11,091 each, while 18 peers failed to vote but still claimed £93,162” and that expenses claims had soared by 20% in just two years “at a time when public services have been under strain.”

Pampered Peers Prattle About Avocados – In January 2018, the ‘National Geographic Discovery Channel’ reported on a peer complaining about a pork chop that was “uneatable, tough and dry, and clearly cooked for hours before.” Of some “gone off” smoked salmon, another member added: “It really was disgrace.”

December 28, 2020
Knightsbridge – Tent City 2020

As Knightsbridge’s Brompton Road turns into a ‘tent city’ for the homeless, Matthew Steeples urges readers to support such people this Christmas

In September 2019, The Steeple Times illustrated the tragic paradox between wealth and poverty in Belgravia with a picture of a passed out homeless man and today, just as most of our readers likely get ready to sit down tomorrow to a veritable feast in their warm residences, we sadly have to reveal that Knightsbridge has gone the same way.

In a year when we also featured the story of a heartless Conservative councilor named Karen Rampton wanting to “fine homeless people for sleeping in doorways,” the area of Brompton Road, SW3 just beyond Harrods has turned into a tent city.

Aside from a charming, aged Irishwoman living in the doorway of the shuttered Bunch of Grapes pub, there are a total of seven tents along this strip. It is truly sad to behold and we urge all our readers to leave something good for such people wherever and whenever you can.

Remember this: One in three families are only one pay cheque away from losing their home; don’t think it couldn’t be you and please be kind and considerate.

Pictured top: Contrasting wealth and poverty with one of Knightsbridge’s ‘Tent City’ residences set against a £300,000 Rolls-Royce Cullinan 4×4 speeding by behind it.

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Knightsbridge – Tent City 2020 – A tent surrounded by rubbish situated on Brompton Road, London, SW3.

Knightsbridge – Tent City 2020 – Another tent is located opposite The Bunch of Grapes pub and the now closed Lord’s Food & Wine store.

Knightsbridge – Tent City 2020 – Further tents are to be found in Beaufort Gardens, a street where Firmdale Hotels operate the Knightsbridge Hotel, a chi-chi “luxury property” where rooms cost upwards “from £447 per night” this Christmas.

December 24, 2020
Jobsworth Jenrick Props Up Property

Jobsworth Robert Jenrick announces estate agents CAN take potential virus spreaders into peoples’ homes even in Tier 4 lockdown areas; a QUARTER of donations to the Tory party come from the property sector

Housing secretary Robert Jenrick likes to do favours for his ridiculously rich cronies. He came to attention in May when he “unlawfully approved” a planning scheme for Richard Desmond (AKA ‘Mr Badger’) and on Saturday, this murky multi-millionaire Tory MP again showed his true colours when he bizarrely tweeted celebrating the fact that estate agents could remain open in Tier 4 areas even.

Whilst the public are cruelly banned from going to a socially distanced restaurant space or from having dinner with their lonely granny in her kitchen because of the risk of spreading coronavirus, how is it acceptable for estate agents to be allowed to take members of the public into the private spaces of peoples’ homes for viewings?

For jobsworth Jenrick, it seems, allowing prospective buyers and tenants to touch doors, walls and surfaces in confined spaces is not at all risky, but one is left wondering how he came to this conclusion. In June, the Independent revealed that the Conservative Party had received £11 million (or over a quarter of their donations) from the property sector since Boris Johnson became Prime Minister.

Pictured top: Disgracefully, Robert Jenrick MP and his government have not made property viewings a “restricted zone” in Tier 4 lockdown areas.

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Stay Homes, Save Lives… But NOT if you’re an estate agent… Why have estate agents not been lumped into “non-essential” businesses forced to close by our incompetent government? The answer as to why “Stay Home, Save Lives” has not been applied to the property sector is unsurprising: A quarter of donations to the Tory Party comes from the property sector and we all know that Robert Jenrick enjoys Carlton Club suppers with rich developers like Richard Desmond.

Jenrick tweeted jubilantly about estate agents remaining open for business on Saturday. His government, meanwhile, has forced many other businesses to close and many of them will most likely tragically never reopen.

Twitter users were unsurprisingly unimpressed by Robert Jenrick’s enthusiasm for estate agents remaining open. One, Gavin Wilkins, remarked: “So thanks to the announcement my mum’s shit scared to come to my house for Xmas (she’s on her own), but I can go to value or view as many houses as I want. Sums it all up. Shitshow – government should be ashamed.”

Boris Johnson is equally happy to hang out with porn baron turned property developer. He should now be asked: “What first attracted you to the multi-millionaire Richard Desmond, Boris?”

December 21, 2020
A Bit of a Bully – Priti Patel

Well-known bully Priti Patel inspires a bingo game after her latest “egregious” telly box blunder over Christmas Covid-19 rules

This morning, finger wagging firebrand Priti Patel did what she does best during an appearance on the telly box: The Home Secretary made a total prat of herself by contradicting her never-sorry self.

Appearing variously on BBC Breakfast, Sky News and ITV1’s Good Morning Britain, Patel – a woman well known for irritatingly saying “movin’” rather than “moving” – showed her incompetence by moving the goalposts of what is and what is not allowed this Christmas.

Mocked resultingly on Twitter and summed up a “bit of [a] bully” in a mocked up Bullseye poster, Patel again proved herself a shameless snitch in remarking: “If I saw somebody flouting coronavirus regulations and the laws, of course I would look to inform the police about that.” 2020’s ultimate “neighbour from hell” then contradicted herself by adding: “[The police’s] role is only to enforce egregious breaches… We’re not here to criminalise people.”

Could someone in government now do us all a favour? Please put poisonous Priti Patel back in the dart box for Christmas.

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A Bit of A Bully –The Twitter user to most accurately sum up the Home Secretary’s latest telly box appearance was one Mark Steel. He remarked: “At last something good has come of Covid. Priti Patel says she won’t be visiting her parents for Christmas. They must be fucking delighted.”

A Bit of A Bully – Twitter user Matthew Payne rightly surmised the shameful contradictory nature of Priti Patel on coronavirus: She’d report her neighbours, but she was happy to let off Dominic Cummings.

A Bit of A Bully – Amusingly, a gentleman named Mike Sweet tweeted: “Priti Patel has a weirdly irritating way of speaking which is difficult to categorise. She is incapable of pronouncing the end sound to lots of words, and yet simultaneously sounds as if she is aping a ‘posh’ accent. It’s all very Mrs Bucket.”

A Bit of A Bully – Another Twitter user shared a new game called ‘Priti Patel Bingo’ complete with an accurate analysis of her misuse of words like “moving,” going,” “working” and “doing.”

December 17, 2020
Carrie, Cummings & Calamity

Matthew Steeples condemns Boris Johnson’s puppet masters for leading him down a path that will bring calamity to our economy in 2021

Unelected decision makers Carrie Symonds and Dominic Cummings ought to go down in history as the architects of the impending disaster zone that should henceforth be simply known as ‘Bankrupt Britain.’

Whilst many might pin the blame for this calamity on a rudderless government, it would actually be untrue to suggest that Boris Johnson is anything other than a plaything of his two aforementioned modern-day slavers. Incapable of deciding anything other than to opt for red or white wine for his latest baby mama to chuck at him, ‘Bosie The Clown’ has morphed from a figure of a fun into a foaming, fumbling fool.

Aside from Matt ‘HanCockup’ pathetically blubbing on the telly box and failing to look human, here in this government we actually have a bunch of nincompoops incapable of understanding the savage impending financial woes of those that put it in office face as we move in 2021.

Whilst elected with the help of the demolition of the ‘Red Wall’ Brexit supporting north, this Tory government came to power promising an ‘oven ready’ solution to our exit from the European Union. Instead, it’s presided over a pandemic it hasn’t had a clue how to handle and now faces gridlock at lorry parks with lavatories named after Nigel Farage in Kent.

In locking up Greater London’s businesses just as they had begun to make a little money prior to Christmas, yet again comes another body blow to the economy that frankly just illustrates that this ship of fools shouldn’t even be in charge of a bus ticket. Shame on them and shame on our lily-livered Prime Minister for hiding behind the coattails of ‘Carrie Not On Regardless’ and her cronies. It is time for Boris Johnson to man up and put the calamity of Carrie back in her puppeteers’ cupboard. Of course, we all know the sad truth: Instead, he’ll sadly just bumble into yet more doom and damage in 2021; God help us all.

Pictured top: Carrie Symonds behaves as if she is the one actually in charge. Sadly, she seems to be morphing into such in spite of her frightful fiancée actually being the one whose government is meant to be running once Great Britain.

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December 15, 2020
Carrie On Cronyism

Carrie Symonds is morphing into the Lynda Snell of Downing Street; this busybody bird’s cronyism and nepotism stinks to high heaven

Boris Johnson’s latest baby mama, Carrie Symonds (AKA ‘Carrie Not On Regardless’), is sadly nothing like the seen-but-rarely-heard prime ministerial spouses of old.

Whilst Denis Thatcher happily took a back seat and parked himself in a corner with a stiff G&T and Norma Major steered clear of anything to do with curried eggs, Symonds is increasingly showing herself as the Lynda Snell of Downing Street.

Like her counterpart Snell in The Archers, Symonds wants to be Queen of the Westminster village pantomime and she especially wants to control her prime puppet, ‘Bosie The Clown.’ Here is a woman who doesn’t take no for an answer and here is someone with the power to manipulate her cast as she so desires.

With her potential nemesis Dominic Cummings, for now, consigned to history for daring to call her ‘Princess Nut Nut,’ Symonds now has a free reign. This morning’s revelation that her best friend and godmother to her child, Nimco Ali, has been appointed a paid advisor without it being advertised is indeed shocking and totally disgraceful proof of that.

Symonds, as we’ve highlighted before, has an address book that is not exactly stellar. Aside from the potential connection to the incarcerated mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell through the charity they both were heavily involved in, this temper tantrum prone, red wine chucking 32-year-old’s links to the far right via her ex-lover’s involvement with Russia and the bigoted Traditional Britain Group stink to high heaven.

If Boris Johnson had an arsehole rather than actually just being one, he’d put this pantomime dame back in the toy box. Sadly, though the cronyism of the diva ‘Carrie Not On Regardless’ will continue, it should be noted for what it is and today we join those calling it out for the disgrace that it truly is.

Pictured top: Carole Boyd (Lynda Snell in ‘The Archers’) is known for cajoling Ambridge villagers into whatever project has currently got her goat; Carrie Symonds is a remarkably similar, though far less tolerable, younger version.

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Carrie On Cronyism – Carrie Symonds is truly the cushy cat that got the cream. For now… How long will it be until Boris gets bored and his eyes get wandering?

Carrie On Cronyism – Blundering buffoon Boris Johnson used to be Dominic Cummings’ puppet. He’s now controlled, instead, by Carrie Symonds.

December 5, 2020
Erecting a C(l)ock

WARNING: EXPLICIT – Chi-chi auction house auction smutty Benny Hill-esque novelty automotive clock; it’ll be erecting a lot of interest

The late comedian Benny Hill once said: “I’m not against half naked girls – not as often as I’d like to be” and added: “Girls are like pianos. When they’re not upright, they’re grand” and surprisingly this month, the normally conservative auction house Bonhams is selling a clock that most definitely would appeal to his slapstick sense of humour.

Described simply as a “novelty erotic desk clock,” the item to be offered in their automobilia online sale is shaped “in the form of a vintage limousine.” The clock is inset into the rear wheel and a hinged door opens “to reveal [an] animated erotic scene” that is “operated” by a pendulum to the rear of the car. They neglect, however, to go into detail of what sexual action the ‘gentleman’ in the rear is actually ‘enjoying.’

Bonhams have set an estimate of £500 to £700 ($672 to $941, €554 to €776 or درهم2,468 to درهم3,455) for the clock and bidding ends on the 14^th December at 14:02 GMT. Someone who doesn’t care about sparing their visitors blushes, will no doubting be erecting a bid.

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Erecting a C(l)ock – The car opens up to reveal a ‘gentleman’ with his trousers down laughing as he is pleasured in a sexual sense by a naked ‘lady.’ One could imagine it sitting in the study of the late Jeffrey Epstein’s New York townhouse.

December 5, 2020
Nasty Nat’s Naughty Notes

‘Nasty Nat’ Natalie Elphicke MP – wife of convicted ex-MP turned sex offender Charlie Elphicke – rightly called out for pestering the judiciary with naughty notes

When she’s not curiously crowing on Twitter about the crappy Brexit trade deals that her government keep screwing up, Natalie Elphicke MP – wife of the disgraced and deservedly jailed sex predator “naughty Tory” and ex-MP Charlie – has been getting her colleagues into the sh*t.

Reported first this morning in the Guardian, immigrant hating ‘Nasty Nat’ and the likes of the trout-mouthed Theresa Villiers, it seems, have been shamefully “seeking to influence a judge overseeing a hearing this week on whether references written in support of the former MP Charlie Elphicke can be made public.”

Admonished as “improper” conduct for their attempt “to seek to influence the decision of a judge who would ultimately rule on the basis of evidence and argument in court,” ‘Nasty Nat’ and her five colleagues – whom also included David Freud, Sir Roger Gale, Adam Holloway and Bob Stewart – should be ashamed of themselves.

Quite rightly, the Guardian also reported: “An application is being made on Wednesday by the Guardian, The Times and Associated Newspapers for release of the letters where the author is a public figure, in public office or holds or has held a position of public responsibility.”

Pictured top: Tory trashbag Natalie Elphicke MP with her filthy sex pest husband and ex-Tory MP Charlie Elphicke. The Belgravia resident turned bottom slapping brute has quite rightly now locked up. Long may he rot!

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November 24, 2020