Nikolay Kalinin urges readers to support journalist and screenwriter Peter Jukes’ crowdfunder as he commences legal action against mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell’s moronic mouthpiece Jay Beecher
Far-right twerp Jay Beecher went somewhat silent after The Steeple Times published an article in April about him joining the hellish circle of utterly delusional individuals hell-bent on defending mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell.
Several days ago, however, this noxious nitwit emerged out of the dark hole that is the Phantom Zone in order to shockingly and without any evidence accuse the talented screenwriter and Byline Times editor Peter Jukes of child abuse in an article for the far-right Politicalite website. According to Beecher, the accuser he wrote of once starred in one of Jukes’ plays after joining an amateur acting group.
Jukes responded on Twitter and announced that he was setting up a legal crowdfunder against Beecher and his associates Jordan Kendall, James Bembridge and James Melville. In another post featuring a screenshot of an email sent to Beecher’s representative, Jukes has denied the clearly nonsensical accusations and stated that if he “actually believed these allegations he should inform the police.”
In another tweet, Jukes stated: “Beecher and James came up with this on the back of a naff Google search on me, having already declared they were going to take Byline Times ‘down,’” which demonstrates that Beecher’s actions are motivated by a desire to bring down a man calling out clear crackpots like him.
Jukes’ complaints against Bembridge and Melville were based on them retweeting the article published on Politicalite – where Beecher is a regular contributor – which reiterated the appalling accusation that Jukes committed child abuse.
Today, I urge readers to support Jukes’ campaign to tackle Beecher’s lies, because his work as editor of Byline Times has allowed people to gain a new perspective on our country, which is important in these divisive times. It is important also that the harmful tosh being spewed by people like Jay Beecher is not allowed to harm anyone else’s lives and it is important also that such individuals are brought to book for their reprehensible conduct.
To contribute to Peter Jukes’ crowdfunder, click here. All donations will be used only to fund the costs of specialist defamation solicitors, Bindmans LLP.
Prior to publication of the ‘Politicalite’ smear, Peter Jukes responded in writing to Jay Beecher’s nonsense with a comment. It read: “These allegations are completely untrue and I believe Mr Beecher to be making them maliciously. Rather than publishing a libelous and contemptible smear – if Mr Beecher actually believed these allegations he should inform the police. I would happily talk to them and prove this is a malicious allegation for which Mr Beecher will be able to provide no proper details or supporting witnesses, because none exist.After ‘The Steeple Times’ highlighted Jay Beecher as an attention seeking desperado devoted to supporting the deviant daughter of the pension pot plunderer Robert Maxwell, Ghislaine Maxwell, in April, the cowardly cretin blocked our Twitter account. Today, we remind readers that what we are dealing with here is an ignoramus with an especially nasty tongue.
Desperate for attention Jay Beecher has pinned himself to a whole array of crackpot ‘causes’ over the years. Aside from having been involved in UKIP (from which he was ultimately and unsurprisingly suspended) and the Tory Party, he more recently created a weird wack job website named ‘The Maxwell Files.’ Here, in June 2021, he published a rambling rant in support of the deservedly incarcerated Ghislaine Maxwell. In it, he quoted the mucky madam’s brother as saying: “One of our favourite games when she was very young was to teach Ghislaine bad words (which of course she did not know the meaning of) and then encourage her to use them in front of our parents when they had guests over which got us into trouble but made Kevin and I hoot with laughter as when Ghislaine, around 4, told a former Principal of Brasenose College, Oxford to ‘piss off’ when he asked her how old she was. We had told Ghislaine that was a form of greeting!” With friends like Beecher, who needs…
Whilst only a few newspapers have delved into his political past, we today ask: “Who REALLY is the bestie of Carrie Symonds and alleged ‘Chatty Rat’ Henry Newman?”
In 2019, ‘Carrie Symonds’ bestie’ and supposed clatterfart Henry Newman described Dominic Cummings as “one of only a few political advisers who understands the importance of, and is truly committed to, reforming the Whitehall machine.” In April 2020, Cummings responded by branding Newman a leaker.
Now, as the media delve into the scandal of Boris Johnson’s hole riddled ship and he seeks to dissipate the disgrace of his decorating debacle, with Cummings’ intervention on Friday, elements of the media have begun to examine exactly who Henry Newman is.
Whilst widely referenced for dancing to ABBA with his longstanding chum Symonds and for being the go-to mouthpiece in support of Brexit during Theresa May’s “Brexit means Brexit” era, Newman should also go down in history for banging on about a need for fortnightly bin collections in Hampstead and Kilburn and for his somewhat bizarre Facebook ramblings.
On his wall on the social media site, former special adviser (SPAD) to Francis Maude and Michael Gove, Newman – a graduate of ritzy institutions including the University of Oxford, Harvard University and the London School of Economics – has shared posts about being drunk. He has remarked that he was once “discreetly charmed by the bourgeoisie” and bragged that he even listened “to the Stones as the economy [collapsed].”
Tellingly also, this one-time “rising star” and “Goveite” also declared he was “drowning in honey, stingless” and, most appropriately, providing illustration of why Daylesford addict ‘Costly Carrie’ counts him as “one of her four favourite people,” once announced: “[I’m] opening an organic box.”
‘Henry The Bin Boy’Newman’s words of wisdom on Facebook…
“Is drunk.”
“Is opening an organic box.”
“Is discreetly charmed by the bourgeoisie.”
“Is drowning in honey, stingless.”
“Once you kill a cow you gotta make a burger.”
“Wondering if he is really a top concern for US immigration.”
“Waiting for Jacqui Smith to resign.”
“Is dancing, dancing, dancing… Is listening to rumba in W. Hartford… Is dancing in the dark… Is missing dancing.”
“Is listening to the Stones while the economy collapses.”
“Is watching his tan fall off.”
“Hates people who don’t know how to use a rowing machine.”
“Is thinking what this country needs is a new taskforce.”
Who is Henry Newman? Facebook posts by him give a clue to his personality.
Descriptions of Henry Newman by…
Boris Johnson:
“One of my three musketeers.”
Carrie Symonds:
“One of my four favourite people.”
Toby Young:
“He is new role model… If you were a [politics show] booker who had to find someone… Newman was the only name on your Rolodex.”
“As the oxygen went out of Theresa May’s premiership, and her withdrawal agreement began to breathe its last, the great balloon of his career became more and more inflated.”
Dominic Cummings:
“All the evidence [regarding the second lockdown leak] definitely leads to Henry Newman… I’m just trying to get the communications data to prove it.”
An unnamed “senior government source”:
“The allegations against Henry Newman are entirely false. He wouldn’t be working in Downing Street if he was suspected of leaking information.”
Who is Henry Newman? A fan of wearing beanie hats that declare: “Let’s get Brexit done,” here is a young man who taught politics at the School of Oriental and African Studies (SOAS), after studying at the University of Oxford, Harvard University and the London School of Economics. He reportedly then “cut his teeth” working in the Cabinet Office during the coalition government years and then joined Michael Gove’s entourage in the Ministry of Justice after he was appointed as the Lord Chancellor in 2015.Who is Henry Newman? Aside from having travelled to Russia in his youth, Newman joined the Vote Leave campaign during the 2016 referendum campaign and, according to ‘The Telegraph’ “was among a close circle of Mr Gove’s friends who were said to have helped to convince him to ‘knife’ Mr Johnson and torpedo his bid for the Tory leadership by deciding to run himself.” Later, a director of the pro-Brexit Open Europe think-tank, Newman was then rewarded for being “loyal” to Carrie Symonds when Boris Johnson came to power.Who is Henry Newman? Let’s not forget that this young man’s best friend Carrie Symonds was previously dating a man, Oliver Haiste (sometimes spelt ‘Haste’), exposed by the BBC in October 2016 for a Russian fake news scandal and for his friendship with Henry Hopwood-Phillips, an individual involved in the far-right, racist Traditional Britain Group. Miss Symonds must be noted also for her having been employed by Oceana, an oceanic charity that Ghislaine Maxwell – the now incarcerated alleged mucky madam to Jeffrey Epstein – was also a tin banger for.
Volkswagen joins those condemned for spreading fakery after we called out PR peddling pillock Ivy Holt for her stupendously stupid stunt whilst we celebrate five moments of true comedy
Our story earlier this week about a PR peddler named Ivy Holt of Media PR Limited attracted a great deal of interest. Taking issue with this dippy dope’s fake news press release on behalf of her client, Love Yourself, one esteemed reader accurately observed:
“To write ‘of’ instead of ‘have’ as part of a past tense verb is one of the absolute, total worst grammatical mistakes one can make. Think similar to ‘we done’, ‘you was’, ‘should have went’… The only way to make it worse is to write ‘should of went’. Drives me mental. Her lack of understanding of apostrophe use pales into insignificance.”
Responding herself about her fakery, Ivy Holt (AKA Ivy Elsby, according to Companies House records) proceeded to send a belter of an email to The Steeple Times. It read:
“[You] now position it as purely fake news to save face. Please don’t read todays [sic] papers, as there is plenty of fake news for April Fools [sic] and I’m sure you will get angry.”
“I have also spoken to my legal team about the personal comments and you will hear further.”
The Failings of Fakery 2021 – Ivy Holt thought she was being clever in sending about fake news on behalf of her client Love Yourself. She actually just made an utter berk of herself and proved herself utterly unprofessional.
Whilst Ms. Holt/Elsby (or whatever name this woman is going by when she seeks to spread fakery is actually called) was also told to “belt up” by one reader and called out as the “worst PR person of 2021” by another, Bloomberg’s Chris Bryant provided another example of the “dangers of [brands] trying [and failing] to be cool and funny.”
In an article published on 31st March, opinion columnist Bryant analysed Volkswagen’s attempt at being funny by claiming they were changing their corporate name to “Voltswagen.” He shared:
“In an era of fake news, the lighthearted April Fools’ Day tradition of companies spinning tall tales has lost its charm. Reporters from trusted outlets such as the Associated Press are furious at having been lied to by VW and made to look foolish. Unlike Tesla, which has long shunned advertising, VW has a massive marketing budget. It should be able to do better than this. A company that misled customers about its vehicles’ diesel emissions needs to tread especially carefully.”
“It’s easy to say VW should just focus on building cars and leave the jokes to people who are actually funny. The company has an ambitious and convincing electric-vehicle plan and may soon leapfrog Tesla to become the world’s largest battery-vehicle manufacturer. But being ploddingly German is an impediment in today’s stock market. Despite being one of the planet’s richest people, Musk’s counterculture savvy and feisty irreverence has made him a hero for Redditors.”
Elsewhere this morning, the Guardian announced a new online ‘masterclass’: ‘Pitching to journalists: A practical workshop for PR professionals’ that is to be held on Monday 12th April from 5.30pm to 8.30pm. It costs just £85 and is hosted by Kate Carter, a former Life & Style editor on the paper.
The course includes content that numbers: “What journalists and editors are looking for – and what they aren’t” and “the dos and don’ts of working with the media.” Plainly, poor dear fakery Queen Ivy Holt is the one person truly in need of being given a ticket – here, indeed, is a perfect sponsorship opportunity for fake news loving Volkswagen or better still Love Yourself, surely.
True Comedy vs. Flatulent Fakery
‘Ginge and Cringe’ wokery loving Ivy Holt proved herself anything but professional in sending out fake news – complete with faked imagery – and rather than getting a positive reaction for her diet regime client, Love Yourself, just produced for them a flatulent fart.
Five examples of true comedy follow to counter this PR peddler’s fakery with actual real amusement:
Caroline Aherne
As Mrs Merton to Debbie McGee (pictured together top): “So what, Debbie, what first attracted you to the millionaire Paul Daniels?”
Jo Brand
“Inside every fat person, there’s a thin person looking to get out – they’ve just eaten them.”
Steve Coogan
“I had a God-awful day last Tuesday. I was having lunch with an entrepreneur from Nottingham. Let’s call him Brian… not his real name… his real name’s Keith.”
Ronnie Corbett
“A cement mixer collided with a prison van on the Kingston bypass. Motorists are asked to be on the lookout for 16 hardened criminals.”
Russell Howard
“Do you think the Queen has ever pulled a blanket up so just her head is showing and gone, ‘Philip, look at me! I’m a stamp.’”
The Failings of Fakery 2021 – Ivy Holt would do well to get herself on the ‘Guardian’s’ course as it might teach her how to operate professionally.The Failings of Fakery 2021 – Kate Carter could definitely teach Ivy Holt a thing or three.
Alleged shoplifter and ‘modern day Dorian Gray’ Richard Madeley attempts to convince ‘Mirror’ readers that his relationship with alleged old soak ‘mummy’ Judy Finnigan is “normal”
In a feature titled “Richard Madeley and Judy Finnigan’s heartbreaks – affair, baby loss and health battles” by ‘showbiz features writer’ Frances Kindon, no mention was made of Madeley’s possible penchant for helping himself in supermarkets, but instead the focus was on how the couple first met.
Of an epic encounter that led to “the most solid union in showbiz,” Kindon gloriously remarked: “Their paths first crossed in a newsroom back in 1982 when Judy, 72, was asked to mentor a younger Richard, 64, and greeted him with the words, ‘Hello… I’m your Mummy’” before then adding that their own daughter finds “the amount of time they spend together is not normal.”
Elsewhere in the puff piece, Kindon reveled in ‘Dick and Dude’s’ “natural chemistry” and celebrated their “whole lot of red-hot chemistry” and positions as “the nation’s favourites.” She referenced “hurtful rumours” about them and then even allowed “sexual oversharer” Madeley to give a riposte. In it, he remarked:
“We’d gone away for a week to Cornwall with our children, and the mobile went in the car.”
“It was our bosses at Granada saying a terrible rumour was being put around that you’re in a self-help institution for men who batter their wives because you’ve beaten Judy, that Judy’s in a drying-out clinic and that the children are in care. We were in the f**king car.”
“We tracked it to the source… A particularly poisonous person. He’d leaked these smears and they were never published because we would have cleaned up in a libel case. But the one thing that lingered like a piece of floating sewage is this thing that Judy drinks. And she doesn’t.”
“I know what it’s like to be wronged by the press. I was once accused of shoplifting. Unlike you though, I knew I was innocent.”
Of women
“I’ve never met a single woman who’s happy with the way she looks, except Jordan, although I’ve never met her.”
On elephants
“So, are you telling me elephants are not born evil?”
To a man crying after paramedics saved his life
“Stop crying! This is supposed to make you happy! Anyway after the break, the biggest dog in the UK. And he really is big. Don’t miss it!”
Of old women skipping
“There’s not many better things than seeing an older woman skipping.”
Of wanting to be black
“I hope when I’m reincarnated I come back black because you age better.”
To Keira Knightley
“Can we get some make up please, get Keira looking like a crack whore, she’d make a good crack whore.”
Of an autistic teenager
“The thing with Daniel [Wakeford, a ‘star’ on Channel 4’s Undateables] is, he has autism but is very intelligent and as we can see extremely talented. Has Daniel always been autistic?”
To a caller
“I understand you have a little lad of 12. Is it a boy or a girl?”
Modest Madeley (And ‘Mummy’ Finnigan) – Judy Finnigan is best known for quaffing, flashing her boobs and falling off sofas. In October 2014, she inexcusably defended footballer turned convicted rapist by saying: “The rape wasn’t violent… He didn’t cause any bodily harm to the person.” Of his victim, she hypocritically then added: “She had far too much to drink.”
Modest Madeley (And ‘Mummy’ Finnigan) – Whilst ‘Dorian Gray-esque’ Richard Madeley is best known for helping himself to champagne in supermarkets, his wife Judy Finnigan will be forever remembered for flashing at an awards ceremony in 2000.
