Friday, December 13, 2024

Know-Alls

“Oh Boy!” – J. P. Morgan Executive On Evil Monster Jeffrey Epstein

That JPMorgan Chase & Co. executive Mary Callahan Erdoes excused Jeffrey Epstein being a paedophile with “oh boy!” and “I don’t know what to believe” emails is proof of how rotten-to-the-core that finance house truly is.

No Excuses Dick – Shame On Those Trying To Suggest Dame Cressida Dick As Little Miss Innocent

Ghislaine Maxwell’s schoolmate Dame Cressida Dick’s bleating about her deserved demise should be called out as the disgrace that it truly is; with her turfed out with the trash it is now time for institutional change at the Met Police.

Ocean Profiteering – Greedy Grabber Fergie Sinks In Sea Like Greedy Groper Ghislaine

Yet again, simpleton Sarah, Duchess of York shows herself as out-of-touch with public sentiment by banging on about her incarcerated mucker Ghislaine Maxwell’s favourite cause – protecting the oceans.

‘Headmaster Harvey’s’ Back – Kinky Harvey Proctor Gets Job Back

As the former “kinky MP” Harvey Proctor gets his job back with the Duke of Rutland, we remind readers of his history supporting apartheid, caning young men “for being naughty” and connections to mucky madam Ghislaine Maxwell.

Philbrick to Phil-Nicked! Inigo Philbrick Hits The Clink

As “vain” and “greedy” Inigo Philbrick gets deservedly jailed for 7 years, we remind readers that he remains a pretentious pillock whilst his bird-brained ‘baby mama’ Victoria Baker-Harber remains a mouthy moron.

Furnish-less Pearl – Meghan Markle & David Furnish Fail

As David Furnish and the Duchess of Sussex’s pathetic pet project ‘Pearl’ gets deservedly kicked into the trash can by Netflix, we ask: “What’s next for the titleless husband of tantrum prone Sir Elton John?”

Heroine of the Hour 2021 – Jackie Weaver

2021’s redoubtable “Queen of Zoom” Jackie Weaver moves on from pesky parish council punch-ups and commandeers comedy and literary lavishness after one of those infamous councillors is convicted of calling his neighbours “tarts” and “Peeping Toms.”

Greedy, Guilty & Gaoled – Inigo Philbrick

‘Mini-Madoff’ Inigo Philibrick admits he did “it for money… that simple” as he pleads guilty to £64 million art fraud; his usually mouthy ‘baby mama’ Victoria Baker-Harber has meanwhile gone surprisingly silent.