17.9 C
London
Tuesday, October 20, 2020

Angry About Otters

Wiltshire manor house owner proves himself a fine example of an ‘angry person in a local newspaper’ in ranting about otters

Whilst most people are worrying about where they can buy bog roll during the coronavirus lockdown, 83-year-old John Aeberhard of Steeple Ashton has taken the time to contact the Wiltshire Times to “warn other fishpond owners to beware” about the threat of otters.

 

Manor house owner Mr Aeberhard, previously the protector of 30 goldfish, koi and other carp, told the paper’s reporter, one John Baker, of how 22 of them were “killed in raids on his pond.” He remarked: “I and my grandchildren are very upset, as the fish all had names.”

 

At first, Aeberhard blamed a heron – of which he’s previously shockingly admitted to catching two in “heron wires installed above and the perimeter of the pond” – but when his gardener suggested “it could have been otters,” the pensioner decided to install electric wires.

 

Describing these carnivorous mammals as “in reality vicious fish killers,” Mr Aeberhard plainly will be leading the way in calling to eliminate these beautiful creatures. Thankfully British law still protects these them and on the government’s guidance website for clarity, we point this ‘Angry Person In A Local Newspaper’ to the paragraph that reads: “You’re breaking the law if you capture, kill, disturb or injure otters.” He should also be made aware: “If you’re found guilty of an offence you could get an unlimited fine and up to 6 months in prison.”

 

Now, Mr Aeberhard, please be civil and leave the descendants of Henry Williamson’s ‘Tarka’ alone. And whilst you’re at it also, leave the herons be as well.

 

Facebook: @TheSteepleTimes

Instagram: @TheSteepleTimes

Twitter: @SteepleTimes

 

10 COMMENTS

  1. What a stupid man. Why did he not put a net over his pond in the first place? Otters are rightly protected and this foolish man should be ashamed of himself for getting herons caught up in nets. He reminds me of an older version of the fox slayer Jolyon Maugham and like him, he should be ashamed of his antics.

  2. Pesky creatures!!!!!!!!!! If they came near my fish pond — I’d club the buggers to death!!!!!!!!!!!! Evil personified — fish killing swines —- DO NOT SEND ANY DOWN UNDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well done Mr Aeberhard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. He is opening himself up to being reported to the RSPCA with his admission that he has installed electric wires that could harm otters.

  4. This man deserves to be prosecuted. He has admitted to snaring herons and now he’s set up equipment that he wishes to electrocute otters. Sick.

  5. This mentally ill geriatric bloke needs help. Put him in a safe space. Seriously – hurting otters. What is wrong with this half-cut lunatic?

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here

Most Popular

Filthy Natalie

Wife of ‘Naughty Tory’ turned replacement MP Natalie Elphicke turns to talking about filthy water (but avoids the topic of her jailbird hubby’s bottom groping).

Get Menendez Out of The Hole

As Erik Menendez is undeservedly thrown in ‘the hole’ in the most ludicrous fashion in California, Matthew Steeples suggests it is time both him and his equally abused brother Lyle were finally released.

Going Bonkers For A Bin

Auctioneers Christie’s sought to sell five waste bins for £230; they ultimately went for the astounding sum of just under £34,000.

Junk the Junk Mail

Instead of banning people from enjoying themselves, the government should should do something useful and ban a genuine disease spreader: Junk mail.

Picture of the Week – A Red Squirrel Riot

Images of a red squirrel fighting a pheasant for hazelnuts and bird seed are proof that both creatures can be quite feisty.

A Pyrotechnic Pad

Mansion in controversial compound in The Boltons, SW10 for sale for £50 million; the setting has seen court cases and pyrotechnic parties involving a self-declared “Relentless” multi-millionaire.

Muddled McCann

As Christian Brueckner’s lawyer justifiably suggests he cannot have been present when Madeleine McCann was allegedly kidnapped, Matthew Steeples argues that other developments will also likely lead nowhere.

A Metropolitan Mess

Though Darren Grimes is frankly nothing but an irritating Brexiteer brat, the Metropolitan Police investigation into his conduct as an interviewer is nothing but ludicrous.

Randy Andy’s Last Stamp

As the Queen stops selling postcards featuring Prince Andrew, an online card printer has started selling ones of the late Jeffrey Epstein’s friend ‘Randy Andy’ with a rather controversial caption.

Moron of the Moment – Benjamin Clark

Extinction Rebellion activist Benjamin Clark deserved more than a fine for painting the word “racist” on a statue of Churchill.

Anth’ Swings Back to Flakegate

Anthea Turner swings into an interview with ‘The Sun’ and shares that she had therapy over her tacky ‘Flakegate’ wedding photos.

Mucky Mossad Madam Maxwell

As prosecutors seek to withhold evidence from alleged Mossad operative Ghislaine Maxwell, the mucky madam has hired a lawyer whose previous clients have been mostly terrorists.

A Marvellous Party with Mrs Bucket

Dame Patricia Routledge’s rendition of ‘I’ve Been To A Marvellous Party’ for theatrical charities will most certainly lift your spirits.

Sorry Hopkins

After Katie Hopkins was forced to say “sorry” to Finsbury Park Mosque, she should now be sent to where she belongs – social media’s equivalent of Siberia.

Mocking The Dockers

Welsh ‘mock castle’ once occupied by notorious spendaholic Lady Docker for sale for £2.85m; the Dockers were turfed out in 1956 after it was discovered they’d lavished the equivalent of £1.3m today of company money on the place without permission.

Nutty Natalie’s Nonsense

Natalie Elphicke MP’s decision to take £25,000 to talk about her ‘Naughty Tory’ husband and her U-turn to now help him appeal his sentence show her as nonsensical, noxious and nutty.

Weather Now

London
broken clouds
17.9 ° C
19 °
17.2 °
63 %
4.6kmh
75 %
Tue
18 °
Wed
16 °
Thu
16 °
Fri
13 °
Sat
14 °