The Steeple Times

Tag: Fulham Road

  • Removing Ralph

    Removing Ralph

    Ralph Lauren are latest to board-up shop in Fulham Road, London

     

    In April, Ralph Lauren shut their flagship Polo store in Fifth Avenue and now they’ve closed one of their two stores on London’s Fulham Road too.

     

    Whilst the reasoning for closing the Chelsea outlet of Ralph Lauren Kids is unknown, the firm has joined many other retailers on the stretch opposite Pelham Crescent to board-up shop.

     

    Matthew Steeples, editor-in-chief of The Steeple Times, observes:

     

    “With an ever-declining number of residents in the Royal Borough, ever increasing commercial rents at the behest of greedy landlords and the prospect of the uncertainty of Brexit, sadly, this won’t be the last closure in the locality.”

     

  • A Land of Contrasts

    A Land of Contrasts

    Kensington and Chelsea – The land of the ‘have-a-lots’ and the ‘have-nothing-at-alls’; an example of a contrast too far

     

    The mere mention of the area of Kensington and Chelsea brings all sorts of connotations: One thinks of the Albert Hall and Hyde Park, Harrods and Harvey Nicks and one imagines affluence and culture. Here is an area that one associates with a certain kind of genteel elegance and one where both dowager duchesses and an educated, international community has long lived in harmony. Sadly, however, the apple cart has tipped and the area has descended to become a place where homeless people shiver on the streets whilst multi-million pound mansions lay rotting. This is an area that has had its soul ripped from its very being and this is an area that has fast become nothing but a money park with a hidden edge.

     

    The cause of this undoubtedly unwelcome change chiefly can be laid at the door of foreign ‘High Net Worth’ (HNW) investors – individuals and corporations who’ve brought ‘Home-aggedon’ to the Royal Borough by snapping up buildings that were once filled with families for crazy sums – and greedy landlords focused on kicking out local businesses in favour of high-paying, trophy tenants. Where once prosperous operations, such as La Brasserie on Brompton Cross, traded for nearly fifty years, are now empty units and outside them sit homeless people begging for scraps.

     

    Yes, there are ‘fake homeless’, but the problem is real and beneath the surface one also finds what can be termed the ‘hidden homeless’. These ‘have-nots’ and ‘have-nothing-at-alls’ sit in Pret stores and mind their own business. They cause no trouble but have been let down by the system. You’d be surprised how many such people there are in the Royal Borough and you should realise one thing: Us mere non-HNW mortals are just one pay cheque away from joining them.

     

    Pictured top: A homeless man in Pelham Street; he ‘lives’ just across the road from the £105 million home of billionaire Professor ‘Muck’ Flick.

     

    A Land of Contrasts – Kensington and Chelsea – The land of the ‘have-a-lots’ and the ‘have-nothing-at-alls’; an example of a contrast too far.
    A Land of Contrasts – Meanwhile, in Knightsbridge, ‘homes’ (not that anyone lives in them) in One Hyde Park sell for up to £140 million
    A Land of Contrasts – Kensington and Chelsea – The land of the ‘have-a-lots’ and the ‘have-nothing-at-alls’; an example of a contrast too far.
    A Land of Contrasts – Now, in Fulham Road, even “trendy” cafes such as L’Eto are unable to afford their rents and are so desperate to get out of their tenancies that they display ‘to let’ signs whilst still trading
    A Land of Contrasts – Kensington and Chelsea – The land of the ‘have-a-lots’ and the ‘have-nothing-at-alls’; an example of a contrast too far.
    A Land of Contrasts – The area’s new wealth, meanwhile, flaunts its money in the most ostentatious fashion possible and has not a care for the community
  • Overheard – 8th April

    Overheard – 8th April

    Clangers overheard and snippets spotted by readers of ‘The Steeple Times’

     

    Candy Knockers

    At Scalini in Knightsbridge, two brash housebuilders from Essex sat devouring veal chops. One referenced his idols and observed: “The Candy brothers have a brilliant setup. They are like the Peter Stringfellows of property”. The other looked puzzled but the first continued: “They’ve got properties that sell as well as Katie Price’s knockers. What assets! Value for money? I don’t know. But, impressive? Hell yeah!” Try telling that to Mark Holyoake.

     

    You’ve Got That Sinking Feeling

    The same duo moved on to talking about their respective staff. The louder of the two offered his thoughts: “I’m so proud of Ray. He’s like the Titanic. He’s like the best ship in the world. Not because it sank but because it was the best ship in the world”. The other opined: “It still f**king sank and Ray will still f**king sink too”. All that was needed next was for My Heart Will Go On to play.

     

    Housing the Godly

    Two priests were spotted drinking Bloody Marys at the bar at PJ’s on Fulham Road. The first remarked: “I never quite manage to get given houses”. The second answered: “Shocking, isn’t it? I look through Country Life each week and I think: ‘All I get given each week is Communion wine’”.

     

    Partying with a 4×4

    A group of ladies gathered in the garden at Chiltern Firehouse after a hard day’s shopping in Selfridges. As they discussed an impending party an absent ‘friend’ was due to host, one Pucci clad creature shared her thoughts. She commented: “It’s not a party. They’re telling porkie pies. They’re just having it to show off that new Range Rover they’ve just bought. I bet they’ll block the bloody drive with it”. Miaow!

     

    An Iggy Hangover

    “My worst hangover was when I drank three bottles of champagne” remarked a passenger on the 14 bus. “Why?” asked her friend. “Because I had to take three days off work and because I thought I was Iggy Pop for two of them”.

     

    Submit comments you hear to [email protected]. We publish amusing and ridiculous chatter we receive and sometimes we change names and locations to protect the identities of the vain and the vacuous.

     

  • Old and New – Sloanes

    Old and New – Sloanes

    New series contrasting the ‘old’ and the ‘new’ begins with Sloane Rangers

     

    Back in the late 1970s and early 1980s, Lady Diana Spencer used to drink at The Admiral Codrington whilst Sloanes named Perdita and Peregrine downed gin like it was water in The Australian in Milner Street.

     

    Loud braces and yellow cords sold like hot cakes and Peter York was king of all he surveyed. Now, in a new era, this socially elite set of characters have had to evolve and though the majority of Kensington and Chelsea is now colonised by wealthy foreigners, Sloane Rangers are still be found braying in Kings Road, SW3.

     

    Old and New – Sloanes – New series contrasting the ‘old’ and the ‘new’ begins with Sloane Rangers

     

  • Sculpting a Residence

    Sculpting a Residence

    Former residence of sculptor with Liz Hurley as a neighbour for sale in Chelsea

     

    The self-described ‘actress’ and diva Liz Hurley is probably the most famous ‘name’ living in cherry tree lined Redcliffe Road, SW10 but a slightly more talented former resident was a sculptor named Alice Lindley-Millican (married in 1917, died November 1930). Her former home, one of just four houses built as artist’s studios in the street, is now for sale.

     

    Sculpting a Residence – Redcliffe Road, London, SW10 9NQ – £5.45 million ($6.6 million or €6.1 million) – Strutt & Parker – Former home and studio of sculptor Alice Lindley-Millican
    Liz Hurley in the street with her then partner Shane Warne

     

    Presented today as a family home and completely reconfigured, the 3,322 square foot freehold residence became home to Mrs Albert Millican – as she was widely referred to – circa 1915. It has accommodation over four floors complete with a dramatic curved staircase between the ground and lower ground floors and 3 reception rooms, 4 bedrooms – including one with a vast window that would also make it suited to be used as an artist’s studio still –and 3 bathrooms. A conservatory breakfast room leads onto a cleverly designed landscaped garden whilst the selling agents, Strutt & Parker, remark that “this [is a] much loved family home offering exceptional entertaining space”.

     

    Given the house is priced at £5.45 million ($6.6 million or €6.1 million) it is most certainly out of the realms of most artists.

     

    Sculpting a Residence – Redcliffe Road, London, SW10 9NQ – £5.45 million ($6.6 million or €6.1 million) – Strutt & Parker – Former home and studio of sculptor Alice Lindley-MillicanSculpting a Residence – Redcliffe Road, London, SW10 9NQ – £5.45 million ($6.6 million or €6.1 million) – Strutt & Parker – Former home and studio of sculptor Alice Lindley-MillicanSculpting a Residence – Redcliffe Road, London, SW10 9NQ – £5.45 million ($6.6 million or €6.1 million) – Strutt & Parker – Former home and studio of sculptor Alice Lindley-MillicanSculpting a Residence – Redcliffe Road, London, SW10 9NQ – £5.45 million ($6.6 million or €6.1 million) – Strutt & Parker – Former home and studio of sculptor Alice Lindley-MillicanSculpting a Residence – Redcliffe Road, London, SW10 9NQ – £5.45 million ($6.6 million or €6.1 million) – Strutt & Parker – Former home and studio of sculptor Alice Lindley-MillicanSculpting a Residence – Redcliffe Road, London, SW10 9NQ – £5.45 million ($6.6 million or €6.1 million) – Strutt & Parker – Former home and studio of sculptor Alice Lindley-MillicanSculpting a Residence – Redcliffe Road, London, SW10 9NQ – £5.45 million ($6.6 million or €6.1 million) – Strutt & Parker – Former home and studio of sculptor Alice Lindley-MillicanSculpting a Residence – Redcliffe Road, London, SW10 9NQ – £5.45 million ($6.6 million or €6.1 million) – Strutt & Parker – Former home and studio of sculptor Alice Lindley-Millican

     

  • The end of freedom

    The end of freedom

    Britain takes a turn for the worse (more…)

  • Maxing the council

    Maxing the council

    A £1.15 million ex-council flat sums up just how bonkers the Chelsea property market truly is (more…)

  • Tommy’s troubles

    Tommy’s troubles

    Thomas McLoughlin sentenced for his latest actions against Matthew Steeples (more…)

  • Locking up the local

    Locking up the local

    Matthew Steeples suggests that the closure of the Knightsbridge restaurant Racine brings with it another nail in the coffin of dining out in The Royal Borough (more…)

  • Jill Dando (1961 – 1999)

    Jill Dando (1961 – 1999)

    Jill DandoSomerset born Jill Dando was the greatly respected presenter of the BBC’s Crimewatch between 1995 and 1999. (more…)