The Steeple Times

Tag: Guest of a Guest

  • Slumlord Kushner’s Broke

    Slumlord Kushner’s Broke

    Jared Kushner – New York’s answer to the 1960s London slumlord Peter Rachman – shown to be unable to pay his debts just as he sticks his mucky mitts in over coronavirus

    Quite rightly branded an “daddy’s boy, total nerd, unelected slumlord” and “sleazy” and “unqualified” by rising star men’s swimwear designer George Sotelo on Instagram, Jared Kushner – the dimwitted Rachman-like husband of the self-serving wench Ivanka Trump – was exposed last week by Guest of a Guest as being unable to pay his debts “right now.”

     

    Kushner – whose father is a convicted tax evader and witness tamperer – has defaulted on the mortage of 229 West 43rd Street, the former New York Times building, and now he’s totally without justification “playing politics” with coronavirus.

     

    Of his input into something this thick-as-pigshit imbecile knows zilch, zero, nada about, many are rightly asking: “Why is Donald Trump allowing this moron to stick his oar in?”

     

    Whilst Guest of a Guest suggest that their “main takeaway” from the finance problem issue is that “if the Kushners can’t afford their payments, we’re all truly screwed,” we’ll take a different tack. Instead, we’d argue, if the Kushners are indeed f**ked, the world would be a far better place. It’s most certainly time to get this ratbag family off the stage.

     

    Pictured top: Slumlord Jared Kushner and slumlord Peter Rachman (1919 – 1962). The word ‘Rachmanism’ entered the ‘Oxford English Dictionary’ as a synonym for the “exploitation and intimidation of tenants” and today ‘Kushnerism’ will enter it as an updated example also.

     

    Facebook: @TheSteepleTimes

    Instagram: @TheSteepleTimes

    Twitter: @SteepleTimes

     

  • Morons of the Moment – Mortimer and Jacqueline Sackler

    Morons of the Moment – Mortimer and Jacqueline Sackler

    Self-entitled drug flogging billionaires Mortimer and Jacqueline Sackler were rightly roasted by ‘Guest of a Guest’ for their (latest) bleating email

    Mortimer D. A. Sackler is a spoilt berk from a family who have galleries named after them. This drip and his ghastly oik of a wife, Jacqueline, hang out with royalty and are part of one of America’s richest dynasties, but there’s something utterly grating about them: They constantly moan.

     

    In July, Jacqueline wrote to her lawyers. In her pathetic missive, this tedious tepid woman whined about the £9.98 billion ($13 billion, €11.99 billion or درهم47.74 billion) the family had gained from flogging dodgy pharmaceuticals including OxyCotin as having destroyed “our work, our friendships, our reputation and our ability to function in society.” She bleated: “And worse, it dooms my children. How is my son supposed to apply to high school in September?”

     

    Now, according to Guest of a Guest, Jackie and her hubby have “been increasingly blacklisted by the upper crust” in New York. “Aren’t they just the worst?” they asked in an email to subscribers. With even the Met museum refusing to take any further donations from them, this vacuous pair have flogged their “ritzy Upper East Side townhouse” and fled to “winter term” it (their words, they wouldn’t come from anyone else, after all) in Gstad, Switzerland.

     

    According to the site, the duo emailed friends and told them: “We would love to see you either in Gstaad, if you are here or nearby, or elsewhere in Europe (taking advantage of the ease of travel here vs ours in NYC).”

     

    A spokesman for this pair of pillocks then followed up to announce that anyone suggesting they were siphoning off funds to Switzerland might be telling untruths and announced: “They fully intend to return to the US in the near future.” Guest of a Guest quite correctly responded: “Here’s hoping they don’t!”

     

    Facebook: @TheSteepleTimes

    Instagram: @TheSteepleTimes

    Twitter: @SteepleTimes

     

  • A $20k Gobble

    A $20k Gobble

    New York hotel offers a Thanksgiving dinner complete with gold-flaked turkeys and bottomless champagne for £15,100

     

    Late last week Guest of a Guest reported that a New York hotel is to offer a Thanksgiving dinner with a difference.

     

    Priced at £15,100 ($20,000, €17,000 or درهم73,500), HGU New York at 34 East 32nd Street’s “luxurious holiday dinner experience” includes the services of a personal event planner, butler service, a 5-piece jazz band, and two king hotel suites. Two gold-flaked turkeys, liquid gold hot chocolate and bottomless champagne form part of a “curated meal” by executive chef Keith Geter also.

    Those with pockets deep enough to book should email [email protected]

     

    Follow The Steeple Times on Twitter at @SteepleTimes.

     

  • Moron of the Moment – Stephanie Mack

    Moron of the Moment – Stephanie Mack

    Daughter-in-law of fraudster Bernard Madoff illustrates how utterly out of touch she truly is with normality and the lives of ordinary, decent people

     

    “The biggest mistake is putting on something you don’t feel comfortable in” casually commented Stephanie Mack (formerly Madoff) to The New York Times’ ‘Style’ in an interview this week.

     

    As if without a care in the world, the daughter-in-law of the world’s worst Ponzi schemer Bernie Madoff – a man whose actions led to financial ruin for many and the suicides of several of his victims – talked to the paper’s Hilary Sargent and shared news that she’s now gone into the business of advising women on how to “choose simple pieces like the best jeans and the kicky accessories to go with them.”

     

    Tastelessly titled: “A Madoff gets a makeover, by giving them,” this cringeworthy feature was plainly designed to give this out of touch with normality woman (whom “loves a good beanie”) room to try and show her human side. It failed and simply illustrated yet another example of the very self-serving entitlement that brought down her father-in-law and those around him.

     

    Remarks such as “I have nothing to hide” are all very well from Ms Mack, but in sharing that she now urges clients coming out of “their recent breakup or divorce” to “drop… $1,200 on a jacket by Iro” she illustrates that money is still her mantra. In adding that her mother-in-law Ruth Madoff is “so much fun to be around” she forgets that this very same woman was shown to be a greedy cross between Imelda Marcos and Barbara Amiel but in commenting: “I’ve urged her to have a comeback. Everyone loves a comeback,” Mack most definitely fails to understand that the public have no desire to see such.

     

    Whilst Guest of a Guest, in toadily referencing the article, decided to term this pointless clothes peddler “the best friend you didn’t know you needed,” we would suggest otherwise: Stephanie Mack – a woman whose new name includes ‘M’ for ‘Madoff’ and vulgarly ‘ACK’ after the airport code for Nantucket (a ritzy location where she once had a holiday home) – is someone one most definitely doesn’t need.

     

  • The Air Went Pop

    The Air Went Pop

    Canadian sues Sunwing Airlines because he was given sparkling wine instead of champagne

     

    A cheapskate airline allegedly promoted a “champagne service” and then bamboozled at least 1,600 customers by serving them cheap sparkling wine.

     

    Quebec based Daniel Macduff, the BBC report, has launched a class action against Sunwing Airlines after he booked a holiday to Cuba that advertised “a complimentary on-board champagne toast” but only was given cheap sparkling wine instead.

     

    Of the legal suit, Sébastien Paquette, a lawyer for Macduff, commented: “It’s not about the pettiness of champagne versus sparkling wine. It’s the consumer message behind it.”

     

    Whilst Sunwing denounce the case brought against them as “frivolous and without merit,” Guest of a Guest’s Stephanie Maida concluded: “Champagne is a basic human right… The gall.” Pass the bubbles.

     

  • Jobbing Wine

    Jobbing Wine

    A dream job for wine lovers; get paid to drink and drive your way across America

     

    An Oregon winery is seeking a ‘Canbassador’ to join them on a roadtrip across America to hawk their range of wines – including their ‘pinot in a can’.

     

    The Union Wine Company, founded by Ryan Harms in 2001 with the aim to create good wines at affordable prices, are looking for an individual to join them in their 1972 Citroën mobile wine bar as it tours US music festivals, store openings and outdoor events. The position encompasses 30-40 hours per week in terms of time commitment, 4-6 months per year and as Guest of a Guest reported last week, here is a chance to “drink and drive the legal way”.

     

    Applicants must be over 21, be able to drive large, manual transmission vehicles with trailers and have good navigation skills. Naturally, they must also have “an appreciation for wine”. A salary is not specified on the company’s website but it will be “commensurate with experience”.

     

    To apply, email [email protected]

     

  • Jack Schlossberg (AKA John Bouvier Kennedy Schlossberg)

    Jack Schlossberg (AKA John Bouvier Kennedy Schlossberg)

    New York born, Yale educated Jack Schlossberg is the only grandson of JFK. The son of designer and artist Ed Schlossberg and former Ambassador to Japan Caroline Kennedy, Schlossberg co-founded ReLight New York, a non-profit organsiation that installed fluorescent lights in low-income housing developments, whilst at school and has expressed a desire to pursue a career in politics. In May 2017, he was interviewed on NBC Today and commented: “I’m inspired by my family’s legacy of public service. It’s something that I’m very proud of, but I’m still trying to make my own way, figure things out, so stay tuned”.

     

     

  • Picture of the Week – Tailgating Par Excellence

    Picture of the Week – Tailgating Par Excellence

    An image of quite possibly the best tailgate bar ever (and two images of the consequential behaviour)

     

    On Monday, Guest of a Guest featured what could quite possibly be the finest tailgate drinking setup ever.

     

    In a series of slides about the 96th Far Hills Running Race Meeting in New Jersey on Saturday, the paper included one of a Range Rover complete with what can only be described as the best mobile bar we’ve seen in ages. It features a bar stocked with gin, whisky, wine, vodka and all manner of bar accoutrements and paraphernalia and is nothing but spectacular.

     

    If they’d been there, Edina Monsoon and Patsy Stone of Absolutely Fabulous and dear old Withnail and I’s Withnail and Marwood would never have got near the horses as this was a bar that just had to be emptied.

     

    The following two pictures show the result of what the real guests subsequently got upto:

     

    Picture of the Week – Tailgating Par Excellence – 96th Far Hills Running Race Meeting in New Jersey – Guest of a GuestPicture of the Week – Tailgating Par Excellence – 96th Far Hills Running Race Meeting in New Jersey – Guest of a Guest

  • Luigi Tadini

    Luigi Tadini

    Luigi TadiniCo-founder of Brooklyn based creative consultancy The Gathery, Luigi Tadini was listed amongst New York’s “most stylish” by Time Out in 2012. (more…)

  • Kyle Hotchkiss Carone

    Kyle Hotchkiss Carone

    Kyle Hotchkiss CaroneA Princeton graduate and “hospitality expert”, uber-connected Kyle Hotchkiss Carone grew up in Connecticut and Long Island. (more…)