Tea leaf Theresa May lookalike goes on the rampage in Hereford and robs a purse; at least she didn’t grab ‘The Donald’s’ hand this time round (or have to share a curry with rotten paedo Rolf Harris)
Featured in the Mirror this morning, it transpires it’s actually not the real Theresa May who has been on the rob in Whitecross Road, Hereford, but in fact just a body double of the ‘Boys Jobs and Girls Jobs’ loving ex-Prime Minister.
According to the paper, “cops are searching for a grey-haired ‘Theresa May lookalike’ after a woman’s purse was taken from a shop” on 11th December 2020. Going further, they added:
“The force released a CCTV image of a middle aged-looking woman wearing a red jacket similar to the one regularly donned by the ex-Prime Minister.”
“Web users were quick to point out the ‘striking resemblance’ to the current Tory MP for Maidenhead after police began circulating the photo.”
Elsewhere, LADbible reported the story had gone viral on social media with one user commenting:
“Looks like Theresa May fell on tough times after the Brexit fallout.”
Another added:
“Oh Theresa, surely times aren’t that hard. I’m sure Boris and his chums would lend you a fiver.”
Theresa The Tea Leaf – This purse stealer was widely described as a “Theresa May lookalike” after West Mercia Police released a CCTV image of her following a theft inside a Hereford store at around 10.30am on 11th December 2020. Of the theft a spokesperson for the force stated: “It is believed another woman put a newspaper on top of the wallet and then took both the paper and wallet. She then left the shop.”Theresa The Leaf – Lady May MP, herself, is often to be found dining with her ‘Garden Gnome-like’ hubby Sir Philip in Malik’s Tandoori House in Cookham, Berkshire. Here, the owner, is pictured serving her and also posing with another regular, her constituent and convicted paedophile Rolf Harris and his wicked wife Alwyn Hughes.
Management of Fulham Road Italian The Chelsea Corner share their anger at the British government with protest posters against Lockup 3.0 and restaurants being branded “non-essential”
Deservedly featured as one of our ‘Five Stalwart Restaurants for your Rolodex in The Royal Borough’ in May 2019, the management of The Chelsea Corner on Fulham Road, SW10 have quite rightly taken a stand against the latest ludicrous government rules that categorise them as “non-essential.”
Echoing our sentiments last September when ‘Bosie The Clown’ brought in his stupid 10pm bar, pub and restaurant curfew, hardworking Jonny Lekaj has decided to put a number of posters in his windows slamming the blanket closure of restaurants nationwide as an “attack on small businesses.”
Aside from highlighting the fact that multi-national, big businesses like Starbucks and McDonald’s are allowed to continue to operate, Mr Lekaj sensibly argues: “If you can close businesses at will, without a though for anyone’s livelihood, why not close junk food producers? If junk food, alcohol and cigarettes kill 21 million people ever year… Why are those items constantly available?”
He is also correct to highlight the greed of landlords at this time and the uselessness of the government and of them remarked: “Landlords aren’t negotiating with us in RENT, open or closed they want their money! Neither is the GOV helping us with it.”
We salute the management of The Chelsea Corner and urge our readers to stand with them and other small businesses against this shameful business wrecking Tory government.
The Chelsea Corner, 451 Fulham Road, London, SW10 9UZ remains open for takeaway. Telephone: +44 (0) 20 3055 0088.
Pictured top: One of The Chelsea Corner’s notice with, rather ironically, a police car to the left on Sunday 10th January.
Jonny Lekaj, manager of The Chelsea Corner, is right to make a stand against the ludicrous decision to force restaurants to close nationwide in Lockdown 3.0.
The signs at The Chelsea Corner read:
This is an attack to small businesses, our hard work and the people of this country. When is enough enough?
If you are not going to pay my rent, why should I close?
Closed because you’re unsafe in a restaurant where tables get cleaned for every person, where staff uses masks, where everyone uses hand sanitizers… But you are safe to shop at a big company where a product has been touched by thousands and cleaned by no one.
We have a choice to make Eating and having a Place To Live or “Staying Home” as the Gov says. We can’t all do Zoom calls, we aren’t all rich and this shouldn’t be a choice we have to make.
We are all essential businesses as long as we are out here trying to make a living for our children.
Everyone at the Parliament got a raise of £3,000 for doing what? Zoom calls and misleading this country into depression but we the ones fighting to keep food in table are being shut down while following every GUIDELINE that came from them.
Landlords aren’t negotiating with us in RENT, open or closed they want their money! Neither is the GOV helping us with it.
You can go shopping in a supermarket or in a shopping centre with more than 200 people, but you can’t come and eat with your family at a restaurant with a max capacity of 50 people.
Sainsbury’s, Tesco, Costco, McDonald’s, KFC, Starbucks etc can stay open. Only small businesses need to shut down because the highest risk to get infected is inside a small business.
If you can close businesses at will, without a though for anyone’s livelihood, why not close junk food producers? If junk food, alcohol and cigarettes kill 21 million people ever year… Why are those items constantly available?
The Chelsea Corner is a popular neighbourhood Italian restaurant situated at the corner of Fulham Road and Gunter Grove in London, SW10.In another image, captured yesterday, the same police car appears to the left of yet another of The Chelsea Corner’s protest signs.
Avocados and a “lack of British chefs in the kitchens” get the goat of out-of-touch British peers just as Norman Fowler calls for their numbers to be cut
This morning, the Mirror revealed that “pampered peers” in the House of Lords have spent 2020 complaining about the quality of avocados just as, in a year when the country teeters on bankruptcy, the taxpayer has propped up their loss-making dining rooms and bars to the tune of nearly £2 million in subsidies.
“Boris Johnson stuffing the House of Lords with his dodgy mates is clearly having its effect.”
“Instead of playing at Downton Abbey, these peers should be looking beyond their own dinner plate and address the real problems people across the country are facing.
Shockingly paid £305 plus travel expenses for each and every day they attend, yet charged just £3.70 for a full English breakfast, peers also “griped” about the halting of the sale of alcohol of the Parliamentary Estate due to coronavirus restrictions. One even whinged that “there were not enough British chefs in the kitchens.”
Elsewhere, last week, Lord Fowler, the lord speaker of the House of Lords, quite rightly argued in the Guardian that “there are too many lords” and remarked on Boris Johnson adding another 52 peers during 2020.
He questioned the sense of the resulting total number of 830 – “despite a cross-party agreement three years ago that numbers should over time be reduced to 600” – and questioned the fact the Lords is almost 200 larger in number than the Commons “and far in excess of what needed to transact its business.”
“As we have just seen, its recommendations can be overridden by No 10. The result is that a prime minister has the power on his or her own to add peers to a house of parliament that can make and, within limits, unmake laws. Is this what the public expect in the third decade of the 21st century?”
“When making appointments it has become obvious that governments wish to avoid parliamentary scrutiny. Both of the initial announcements of new peerages in the last 12 months have been made when parliament has not been sitting. It simply adds to the impression that the choice of peers is the exclusive preserve of No 10 – and the less publicity the better. This may be fine for the government’s public relations team: whether it is fine for parliament is another matter.”
Pampered Peers Prattle About Avocados –In March 2015, ‘The Steeple Times’ reported that “peers had complained about being left ‘scarred’ after having had their dinner bookings cancelled and were angered by the size of the menus, ‘chaotic’ table layouts and ‘inferior cappuccinos.’”Pampered Peers Prattle About Avocados – Norman Fowler, Baron Fowler PC is quite right to call for reform of the House of Lords. A 2017 “analysis of voting, speaking and expenses records in the Lords, [showed a] ‘something for nothing culture among peers” by the Electoral Reform Society astonishingly revealed “115 Lords – one in seven of the total – failed to speak at all in the 2016/17 session, despite claiming an average of £11,091 each, while 18 peers failed to vote but still claimed £93,162” and that expenses claims had soared by 20% in just two years “at a time when public services have been under strain.”
Pampered Peers Prattle About Avocados – In January 2018, the ‘National Geographic Discovery Channel’ reported on a peer complaining about a pork chop that was “uneatable, tough and dry, and clearly cooked for hours before.” Of some “gone off” smoked salmon, another member added: “It really was disgrace.”
Native oysters bizarrely reappear in Belfast Lough after 100 years of absence without any human intervention
In March, as the world locked down due to coronavirus, one note of positivity came in the form of reports of Venetians reporting that their canals were clearer and cleaner.
Now, this morning, the Guardian, followed up with similarly good news from Northern Ireland in sharing that “native oysters have unexpectedly returned to the shores of Belfast Lough after more than 100 years” absent.
“Fished to oblivion” from the 1800s, a systematic survey in May and June found 41 live ostrea edulis European flats along the coast and of the news, Joanne Preston of the University of Portsmouth told the paper: “I think it’s really interesting. The take-home message is, if you create the environmental conditions… then the species will be able to establish again.”
Obviously a “boost to biodiversity in the lough, since [they] filter seawater and their shells provide a habitat for many other sea creatures including tiny worms, snails, algae and anemones,” David Smyth of Bangor University in Wales commented: “The big question is, how did they get there?”
Citing that “the lough could one day be home to a future oyster fishery right near Northern Ireland’s capital,” here indeed could be one light of hope for the fishing industry as we career into Brexit Britain 2021.
When Covid-19 restrictions allow, we urge readers to head to Britain’s oyster capital, Whitstable, and visit the restaurant we reviewed in March 2016, the Whitstable Oyster Fishery Company (first established as a cooperative in 1793). Here, we suggest, you’ll find the finest seafood that will utterly delight you.
Credited with reviving interest in oysters, the current owners of the Whitstable Oyster Fishery Company, the Green family, have very much led the transformation of Kent’s answer to Burnham Market in Norfolk or Salcombe in Devon into a fashionable destination for foodies and art lovers. Could the same eventually happen in Northern Ireland at Belfast Lough?
Jobsworth Robert Jenrick announces estate agents CAN take potential virus spreaders into peoples’ homes even in Tier 4 lockdown areas; a QUARTER of donations to the Tory party come from the property sector
Housing secretary Robert Jenrick likes to do favours for his ridiculously rich cronies. He came to attention in May when he “unlawfully approved” a planning scheme for Richard Desmond (AKA ‘Mr Badger’) and on Saturday, this murky multi-millionaire Tory MP again showed his true colours when he bizarrely tweeted celebrating the fact that estate agents could remain open in Tier 4 areas even.
Whilst the public are cruelly banned from going to a socially distanced restaurant space or from having dinner with their lonely granny in her kitchen because of the risk of spreading coronavirus, how is it acceptable for estate agents to be allowed to take members of the public into the private spaces of peoples’ homes for viewings?
For jobsworth Jenrick, it seems, allowing prospective buyers and tenants to touch doors, walls and surfaces in confined spaces is not at all risky, but one is left wondering how he came to this conclusion. In June, the Independent revealed that the Conservative Party had received £11 million (or over a quarter of their donations) from the property sector since Boris Johnson became Prime Minister.
Pictured top: Disgracefully, Robert Jenrick MP and his government have not made property viewings a “restricted zone” in Tier 4 lockdown areas.
Stay Homes, Save Lives… But NOT if you’re an estate agent… Why have estate agents not been lumped into “non-essential” businesses forced to close by our incompetent government? The answer as to why “Stay Home, Save Lives” has not been applied to the property sector is unsurprising: A quarter of donations to the Tory Party comes from the property sector and we all know that Robert Jenrick enjoys Carlton Club suppers with rich developers like Richard Desmond.Jenrick tweeted jubilantly about estate agents remaining open for business on Saturday. His government, meanwhile, has forced many other businesses to close and many of them will most likely tragically never reopen.Twitter users were unsurprisingly unimpressed by Robert Jenrick’s enthusiasm for estate agents remaining open. One, Gavin Wilkins, remarked: “So thanks to the announcement my mum’s shit scared to come to my house for Xmas (she’s on her own), but I can go to value or view as many houses as I want. Sums it all up. Shitshow – government should be ashamed.”Boris Johnson is equally happy to hang out with porn baron turned property developer. He should now be asked: “What first attracted you to the multi-millionaire Richard Desmond, Boris?”
Prince Andrew and his daughter’s dining habits – and the tall tales about did-he-or-didn’t-he go to Pizza Express (Woking branch) – get this dopey dork-like pair into hot water yet again
Prince Andrew wants to be remembered for going to ‘nanny’s day off’ eateries like Pizza Express to get a non-sweaty alibi. He likely won’t. His daughter, Princess Beatrice, doesn’t want to be remembered for going to chi-chi Mayfair munching spots like Isabel for rule breaking rendezvous. She most definitely did.
Here, in yet another case of ‘like-father-like-daughter’ (no doubt guided by the advice of the childlike live-in ex-wife and mother Sarah Ferguson), these royal embarrassments have shoved their hooves into the proverbial yet again. As self-entitled and dumb as they are, will this thicko family never learn?
Whilst Princess Beatrice has been slammed for ‘doing a Kay Burley’ and breaching Tier 2 Covid regulations by The Sun, the fact that her dad ‘Randy Andy’s’ Pizza Express alibi has been basically trash canned is proof that the House of York should now be the one family in Britain actually adapting Boris Johnson’s monotonous mantra. Instead of: “Stay at Home, Save Lives,” it’s time for these rotten royals to: “Stay at Home, Stop the Lies.” A Bachelors Cup-A-Soup for dinner, Beatrice?
Dining With The Dorks – The Duke of York’s seemingly preposterous Pizza Express Woking alibi has deservedly been the source of ridicule now for more than a year. Here is a man, after all, who’s known for his love of spending other peoples’ money enjoying luxuries such as Bentleys, helicopters and private jets and for enjoying the company of the notorious skinflint Bernie Ecclestone.Dining With The Dorks – Of Princess Beatrice’s dinner at Isabel, one fellow diner told ‘The Sun’: “Bea should be setting a better example. I couldn’t believe my eyes. If the royal family can’t get coronavirus rules right, what hope for the rest of us? … One of my pals saw her and started joking, ‘Orf with her head’ and ‘Send her to the Tower.’”Dining With The Dorks – Whilst Prince Andrew likes to go low-key and dine at Pizza Express (Woking branch), his ex-wife Sarah Ferguson likes to live it up in ‘Celebrity Waitrose’ in Belgravia. If she simply took her family home a few ‘Meal Deals,’ she could save the House of York a lot of embarrassment. Get to it ‘Queen of Toe Sucking!’
The government’s decision to ban people from further drinking after they’ve finished a “substantial meal” is pointless and pathetic
This morning, The Sun on Sunday revealed that the government is ludicrously banning people dining on “substantial meals” from having an extra drink after they have finished munching in pubs.
‘Carrie Not On Regardless’s’ puppet ‘Bosie The Clown’s’ spokesman told the paper:
“The length of exposure is one of the main factors in the spread of the virus which is why alcohol may only be served as part of a main table meal, and cannot be served once the meal is finished.”
“There is no prescribed limit for how long a meal is expected to take, however we expect people to act reasonably and exercise good judgement.”
In response, readers left some very pointed comments. They numbered:
“Order a soup and request a fork to eat it with. Simple.”
“Just leave a chip on the plate.”
“Eat slowly, very slowly!”
“They are extracting the urine, big time.”
“So go to Wetherspoons, order egg and chips and six pints. Eat a chip and then spend three hours drinking. That’s how Tory Tim [Martin] will get round this one.”
“They want you to stuff yourself silly in a packed bar, restaurant piling on the pounds when their own scientific evidence suggests that fatties are some of the most vulnerable to COVID-19.”
“Just order the food and eat half of it, take three or four hours to eat slowly, order more drinks. Now bog off Doris and co.”
“I’d be cutting my peas into quarters.”
“Fish, chips and eight pints of wife-beater, please.”
“Large bowl of rice a toothpick, please.”
Yet again providing evidence of how all-over-the-shot the chaotic new ‘tiering’ system will be, here is another death knell for an already on its knees sector. With seven out ten pubs predicted to close as a result of the already “damaging” restrictions, where, after this all ends, will be left to go for a cheeky pint?
Pintless, Pointless & Pathetic – As a result of the damaging yet pointless policies of this government, we might end up left with just 30% of the pubs that were open before the coronavirus pandemic struck.
That Gordon Ramsay thinks it acceptable to start selling burgers at £80 a pop at a time of economic meltdown confirms him as a cretin
When he was not offensively mouthing off on our telly boxes during the last lockup, Gordon Ramsay spent the summer in Cornwall pissing off permanent residents during the coronavirus lockdown. Now, at a time of complete economic meltdown, this petulant prat and prized pillock has gone one stage further and has announced he’s going to sell burgers for the staggeringly stupid sum of £80 each.
Announcing the plans for ‘Gordon Ramsay Burger’ on Instagram, the completely out-of-touch with reality chef and all-round cretin stated: “I’m really excited to announce, I’m bringing the Gordon Ramsay Burger to Harrods in Knightsbridge for the first time ever.”
The alleged philanderer continued: “Trust me, this is going to be a burger experience like no other as we’ve really elevated our patties using the most incredible mix of the UK’s best cuts of meat.”
Chips are not even included in Ramsay’s con: They will set you back an extra £8 per portion whilst onion rings can be had for the ‘bargain’ sum of £7 a pop. Do note, they are at least “beer battered.”
Previously in April, Gordon Ramsay banged on about cooking burgers for frontline NHS workers. How on earth does he think they’d afford his ridiculous £80 a bap offering?
Land Rover converted into a ‘gastrowagon’ for television chef Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall’s first television series heads to auction
Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall headed “for open country to spend some time eating off the fat of the land in a trawl through Britain’s wild larder” in his debut 1997 series for Channel 4, A Cook on the Wild Side.
During his quest for wild ingredients without a penny in his pocket other than for fuel, he found fame and also drove a 1965 Land Rover Series II 109” wheelbase that was converted into what is endearingly known as a ‘gastrowagon’ circa 1982.
Built specifically for the series, the vehicle was not only where the television chef and Eton contemporary of David Cameron cooked and ate, but also where he slept – in an upturned boat with a mattress perilously perched on the roof.
In the series, Fearnley-Whitingstall – whom is also widely known by the nickname ‘Hugh Fearlessly-Eatsitall – took his ‘Gastrowagon’ everywhere from the New Forest and Scotland to Trafalgar Square in London. It subsequently sadly got left to rot, but has more recently been “fully restored by Land Rover specialists John Brown 4×4 to ‘like new’ condition” according to auctioneers Bonhams.
Of this travelling cook’s paradise, they declare: “The roof-mounted boat is the sleeping quarters, while the back of the Landie features a full kitchen with a two-burner hob, oven, and fridge, all in very good working order and covered by a wind/waterproof canopy. Ancillaries include running water for the shower and wash basin as well as a ‘vintage’ ice cream maker. The bulkhead has been signed by Hugh since the restoration was completed and the vehicle is said to run and drive like new.”
Bonhams have set an estimate of £25,000 to £35,000 ($33,200 to $46,500, €28,000 to €39,200 or درهم121,900 to درهم170,700) for the 2.25-litre Land Rover ‘Gastrowagon’ and will sell it at their Bicester Heritage sale on 11th December.
A socially distanced Christmas lunch on the road anyone?
Pictured top: The ‘gastrowagon’ and Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall – whose ‘Hugh’s Fish Fight’ campaign we featured back in August 2013.
Matthew Steeples slams ‘Bosie The Clown’s’ pub destroying lockdown; 7 out of 10 pubs are likely to close as a result and the nation will be left pintless
This morning, the Guardian shockingly reported that seven out of ten British pubs could close as a result of ‘Carrie On Not So Regardless’ and her puppet ‘Bosie The Berk’s’ plainly pointless “damaging Covid-19 restrictions.”
Shamefully, in spite of research finding that 82% of pubgoers believing “that pubs and other hospitality venues offered a Covid-secure environment,” the likelihood of them reopening after the 2nd December seems low with each and every leak from our inept government.
A Pintless Policy – The Hour Glass in Brompton Road on the South Kensington Estate closed “temporarily” in Lockdown 1.0. It did not open again and locals have been left asking: “Will it ever?”A Pintless Policy – Recent research by the Hospitality Union found that only 2% of Covid-19 cases were connected to food outlets and restaurants. Just 18% came from other sources, yet schools and universities – which Boris Johnson has kept open – account for a staggering 22% of the total.
