The Steeple Times

Tag: UKIP

  • On Yer Bike Nige

    On Yer Bike Nige

    As Nigel Farage ludicrously suggests Britain is “a country of doubtful democratic legitimacy” (in spite of it giving him the Brexit he so desired this very year), we join those suggesting that this furious Firestarter is still very welcome to leave

    “This incident has confirmed my worst fears about the country Britain is becoming” wrote Nostradamus-like Nigel Farage in The Telegraph on Tuesday evening. The same Farage, that is, that was celebrating Boris Johnson and Brexit on 31st January in Parliament Square; the same Farage who finally had the Darling Buds of May mixed with Last of the Summer Wine pastiche version of Britain he has for so long dreamt of.

     

    Farage, at that moment, was “optimistic” and “celebrating the free world” and whilst braying about his dream having finally come true, boldly went as far as to state: “This is the greatest moment ever in the history of our great nation.”

     

    Now, it’s all gone so horribly wrong. After having a visit from the police as a result of breaching lockdown restrictions that ordinary people have willingly obeyed, Farage angrily proclaimed of the police: “I was astonished and, although I remained polite, incredulous. I replied: ‘I’m not going to take that.’”

     

    Continuing his diatribe about what he calls the “new police state” run for the “sneerocracy,” hypocritical Farage – whose two children have German passports (which allows them continued free movement in Europe) – concluded: “I don’t know if I will be stopped and fined if I attempt to do my job again. However, I will look at the shipping forecast. Without question, on the next calm day they will come again, and I will be there to cover this scandal.”

     

    Perhaps, instead, of meddling at a time of pandemic lockdown when his interventions are most definitely not required, this berk could just adapt the advice of Norman Tebbitt and get in a boat. Nigel Farage could sail away to somewhere he’s actually wanted – that being his very own mecca, Trumpland. There, in the manner of Dick Whittington, this fervent Firestarter might even find the streets paved with currency to replace that that he used to take in very, very generous EU expenses.

     

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  • Overheard – 10th April 2020

    Overheard – 10th April 2020

    Clangers overheard and snippets spotted by readers of ‘The Steeple Times’ – including a return of the best interviewee of the 2019 General election, Pat “I object to everything” Mountain

    Back to Basics

    “In two months, all the Instamodels will be prostitutes and all the Instapreneurs will be criminals. Just like the old days” – A fair analysis posted on Instagram by @OverheardLondon.

     

    How Suitably Existential

    In the Evening Standard: “Alexa Chung said: ‘Since all we can do is pretend, I thought I’d dress as a mime.’” Is there nothing this petulant pest won’t do to get attention?

     

    Carrier Bag Distancing

    From the ‘Overheard in Waitrose (The Original Group)’ on Facebook: “When shopping in Waitrose, ensure others shoppers stay the recommended two metres away by taking a Lidl carrier bag with you.”

     

    Jared’s A Doll

    American comedian Kathy Griffin on Donald Trump’s nefarious son-in-law Jared Kushner on Twitter: “Looks like a blowup doll nobody wants to f**k.”

     

    Cheery Mountains

    A Twitter user going by the name of @_teletext to Adam Boulton of Sky News: “Hi Adam. Can you get Pat Mountain back on Sky News for a chat? I think we all could do with cheering up. Cheers, pal.” As the old bat’s likely quarantined for everyone else’s safety for “coronavirus and beyond,” we again share ‘Nan From Catherine Tate’s-lookalike’s’ interview below. Please, please don’t die crying (with laughter).

     

    Submit comments you hear to [email protected]. We publish amusing and ridiculous chatter we receive and sometimes we change names and locations to protect the identities of the vain and the vacuous.

     

    Pictured top: The “I object to everything” expert on Brexit, feminism, immigrants, “people jumping out of the shadows at night,” racism and “other racist parties,” religion, the “predicament” of Tommy Robinson and just about all else that isn’t milk bottle white, the great “left-behind realist” who “won’t be entering number 10 Downing Street anytime soon” Pat Mountain.

     

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    Overheard – 10th April 2020 – Amusing clangers and snippets – Clangers overheard and snippets spotted by readers of ‘The Steeple Times’ – including a return of the best interviewee of the 2019 General election, Pat “I object to everything” Mountain.
    Mime or Wine? (We know which we’d rather) – Whilst Alexa Chung’s attempt at humour was, as can always be expected of such a tedious wench, a failure (left), this old lady made many laugh in the Facebook chattering spot ‘Overheard in Waitrose (The Original Group).’
    Overheard – 10th April 2020 – Amusing clangers and snippets – Clangers overheard and snippets spotted by readers of ‘The Steeple Times’ – including a return of the best interviewee of the 2019 General election, Pat “I object to everything” Mountain.
    Kushner Gets Sexual – Comedian Kathy Griffin doesn’t exactly hold back when expressing her thoughts about the appearance of Jared Kushner.
  • Leave Ambulances Alone

    Leave Ambulances Alone

    Brexiteers in yellow vests shockingly take pride in blocking an ambulance from Guy’s and St Thomas’ hospital on Westminster Bridge

     

    Yesterday, Leave.EU’s official Twitter account proudly shared a video of Brexiteers in yellow vests blocking the road on Westminster Bridge.

     

    Aside from declaring that “this is what happens when the establishment ignores the will of the people,” whoever posted this message on behalf of this ragbag organisation added a video of the protestors refusing to let an ambulance on an emergency run through.

     

    Widely condemned elsewhere on Twitter by amongst others Sky News’ political editor Faisal Islam, the footage of this despicable occurence has been retweeted over 3,250 times and liked by over 6,300 people. With comments such as “you vile bastards” and “next week they’re gonna film themselves kicking a lollypop lady, that’ll show the elite” submitted in response, here is an account of behaviour that not even the miners would have stooped to in 1970s and 1980s.

     

    Shame on Leave.EU and their cohorts for this supporting those acting in such a repugnant and irresponsible fashion; it only confirms how twisted they truly are.

     

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    Leave Ambulances Alone – Brexiteers blockade an ambulance – Brexiteers in yellow vests shockingly take pride in blocking an ambulance from Guy’s and St Thomas’ hospital on Westminster Bridge.Leave Ambulances Alone – Brexiteers blockade an ambulance – Brexiteers in yellow vests shockingly take pride in blocking an ambulance from Guy’s and St Thomas’ hospital on Westminster Bridge.Leave Ambulances Alone – Brexiteers blockade an ambulance – Brexiteers in yellow vests shockingly take pride in blocking an ambulance from Guy’s and St Thomas’ hospital on Westminster Bridge. Leave Ambulances Alone – Brexiteers blockade an ambulance – Brexiteers in yellow vests shockingly take pride in blocking an ambulance from Guy’s and St Thomas’ hospital on Westminster Bridge. Leave Ambulances Alone – Brexiteers blockade an ambulance – Brexiteers in yellow vests shockingly take pride in blocking an ambulance from Guy’s and St Thomas’ hospital on Westminster Bridge. Leave Ambulances Alone – Brexiteers blockade an ambulance – Brexiteers in yellow vests shockingly take pride in blocking an ambulance from Guy’s and St Thomas’ hospital on Westminster Bridge.

  • Repugnant Robinson

    Repugnant Robinson

    Matthew Steeples suggests that continued interest in the case of Tommy Robinson illustrates a very dangerous extremist underbelly still exists in British politics

     

    Whatever the complexities of the case against Tommy Robinson and Judge Nicholas Hilliard QC’s decision to refer the allegation of contempt of court against him to the Attorney General, one thing is clear: the appearance of him and his thug-like followers outside the Old Bailey today simply shows that British politics has still not managed to see off far-right extremism.

     

    Former English Defence League (EDL) leader Robinson – whose real name is Stephen Yaxley-Lennon – arrived at the court this morning supported by “hundreds of supporters” according to the BBC. As he left, shouts of “Oh, Tommy, Tommy” and “We want Tommy out, we want Tommy out” emanated from what was described as “an enthusiastic crowd.”

     

    Supported also by the equally nasty nutcase Gerrard Batten, leader of the United Kingdom Independence Party (UKIP), who took to a stage to remark: “It looks very much like when Tommy was jailed, for the alleged contempt of court, this was about who he was, not what he was saying,” 35 year old Robinson himself then decided to speak. He announced he thought he’d “acted in good faith” when he violated reporting restrictions on grooming trials at Leeds Crown Court in May and announced: “My continued prosecution is because of who I am rather than what I did.”

     

    Bizarrely next – as his supporters chanted the mainstream media were “scum” – Robinson then described himself as a “journalist.” He added:

     

    “What’s changed is that last night they received my statement of evidence to go before the court. It would appear my treatment is exceptional. I would ask to be treated the same as every other journalist.”

     

    “To the journalists: The British public do not trust you, they do not believe you. You are the enemies of the people.”

     

    Whether the allegations against Robinson are ultimately proven true or false, right-minded individuals will surely accept the scene outside the court today to be illustrative of the continued presence of dangerous extremism in a country considered to be tolerant. Messrs Batten, Robinson and their far-right opinions represent a threat to us all and they deserve to be highlighted as such.

     

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  • F*** Off Farage

    F*** Off Farage

    Nigel Farage’s return to “frontline politics” is going to bring nothing but division and diversion suggests Matthew Steeples

     

    Nigel Farage just can’t help himself: A failed candidate seven times in British Parliament elections and leader of UKIP twice, this bombastic brute is now “returning to frontline politics” in order to “challenge Theresa May’s ‘fraudulent’ Brexit plan.”

     

    A man of contradictions, Farage – who is anti-Prince Charles, pro-Vladimir Putin and in favour of the legalisation of handguns in the UK – wrote of his intentions in this morning’s Daily Telegraph in an article titled: “The time has come to teach the political class a lesson: I’m back fighting for a real Brexit.” In the opinion piece, he remarked:

     

    “Over the last few months, and particularly since the Chequers betrayal, scores of people have stopped me in the street to ask: ‘When are you coming back?’ Well now you have your answer: I’m back.”

     

    “Theresa the Appeaser has produced a set of ideas that are nothing more than a cowardly sell-out. With all this in mind, now is the time for action.”

     

    “It is now beyond doubt that the political class in Westminster and many of their media allies do not accept the EU referendum result. It is equally clear to me that, unless challenged, these anti-democrats will succeed in frustrating the result.”

     

    “Well, I’ve had enough of their lies, deceit and treachery. The time has come to teach them a lesson – one that they will never forget.”

     

    In response to this predictable publicity stunt, James McGrory, of the pro-remain People’s Vote campaign group, told The Guardian:

     

    “Nigel Farage has had more comebacks than Frank Sinatra, just without the success. If he was serious about making a return to frontline politics, he would stand to be an MP. I can only hope that Nigel Farage sticks to the promise he made live on TV to have a people’s vote on the final Brexit deal.”

     

    In reality, all this move shows is that Farage is nothing but self-motivated. In the past I’ve termed him a “man of the elite” but now I’ll go further: Nigel Farage is nothing but a self-serving meddler and yet again – mark my words – the insane nightmare he desires serving up to the British public will fall flat on its face.

     

    #ExitBrexit

     

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  • Bozos, Burkas and Farage

    Bozos, Burkas and Farage

    Matthew Steeples suggests Nigel Farage is wrong about Boris Johnson’s latest gaffe about burkas in Britain

     

    On Wednesday morning, on Sky News, Nigel Farage was interviewed about what he thinks about Boris Johnson – a self-serving man who simply loves to stay in the headlines – comparing women in burkas to “bank robbers” and suggesting they “look like letter boxes.”

     

    Farage argued that “Joe Public is not interested” in this story and went as far to suggest: “This is just for the Westminster bubble… Politics is way to PC… You have to accept that sometimes people will be offended.”

     

    Clearly, Farage has misjudged the interest in Johnson’s clearly provocative comments. This may be the ‘Silly Season’ but wherever I go in the UK and whenever I am in a situation where there are burka wearers, people – of all backgrounds – have something to say. Some are of the opinion that we must be respectful of such whilst others are of the mind that the burka is nothing but inappropriate in a modern, Western society.

     

    In such places as Iran and Saudi Arabia, females, foreign and local, are forced to conform to the dress codes of those countries. Many here in Britain consider such “medieval” and “backward” and I, for one (as much as I personally loathe the bozo Johnson), certainly don’t believe anyone should be silenced from sharing their views for or against a ban on the burka in Britain.

     

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  • Analysing Borwick

    Analysing Borwick

    The Cambridge Analytica connection you’ve most likely never heard of; meet The Hon. Thomas Borwick, son of ex-Tory MP Lady ‘Call Me Victoria’ Borwick

     

    The Hon. Thomas Borwick is a figure in the Cambridge Analytica scandal you’ve probably never heard of.

     

    Bizarrely largely overlooked by the mainstream media, the son of the ousted ex-MP for Kensington Lady ‘Call Me Victoria’ Borwick is an extremely well connected man who keeps himself under the radar on social media. The 31-year old has just 500 followers on Twitter – a surprisingly low number given he has been described as a “computer specialist” – and was put in a position of huge power as Vote Leave’s chief technology officer from August 2015 to July 2016.

     

    Educated at the University of Richmond, Virginia from 2006 to 2010, with a period studying law courses at Cambridge briefly during 2008, Borwick subsequently worked in IT for the financial services company Killik & Co in 2012 and simultaneously “developed music technology for interactive lessons.”

     

    More interestingly, this youngster’s move into political data profiling came also in 2012 when he founded a company named Kanto Systems with an aim of “bring[ing] UK Campaigning into the 21st century.” Here, Borwick developed a “mobile canvassing app” and came into contact with Cambridge Analytica in order to provide them with “digital services,” according to The Huffington Post. In turn, he sold an app to Cambridge Analytica’s parent company, SCL, and now, in March this year, his firm was brought in by Ireland’s Save The 8th anti-abortion campaign group as part of their efforts “to persuade Irish voters to keep the country’s strict anti-abortion laws.”

     

    “Hiring Thomas Borwick to create and manage a website is like employing the SAS to run security at a school hop or bringing in Einstein to tot up your shopping bill,” comments journalist Fintan O’Toole in The Irish Times, and in further revelations in the Evening Standard late March, Borwick himself admitted to also having worked with the equally controversial Canadian data firm Aggregate IQ – an operation that earned £3.5 million working for Vote Leave during the 2016 referendum campaign.

     

    The public and press need to wake up and smell the coffee. The manipulation of politics in America, Britain, Ireland and elsewhere runs far deeper than even the most avid viewer of the Daily Politics could imagine. Figures like Thomas Borwick may well operate in the backrooms but it is increasingly becoming apparent that with doorstep canvassing all but irrelevant, such people are worryingly our new political powerhouses.

     

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  • Warped Walker vs. Magnificent Markle

    Warped Walker vs. Magnificent Markle

    Kushner-Trump mouthpiece Andre Walker’s attack on Meghan Markle was an utter disgrace; it is time that this warped weirdo was called out for what he truly is

     

    Unsurprisingly yesterday, the self-declared “fat Northern bruiser” turned Jared Kushner’s London based mouthpiece Andre Walker appeared on Sky News to defend Donald Trump’s “right” to retweet far right fake news shared by Britain First’s deputy leader Jayda Fransen.

     

    Elsewhere on Tuesday, slug-like Walker – an extremely sad excuse of a man who’ll forever be linked to his associations with the scandal linked to the ‘Tatler Tory’ Mark Clarke, the suicide of a Conservative activist named Elliott Johnson and his previous position at Steve Bannon’s bigoted Breitbart – decided to brand Prince Harry’s fiancée “a black woman in Buckingham Palace… [who] will have to bite her lip rather than supporting her old acting friends in the causes they love” in an article for the Kushner owned New York Observer.

     

    Going further and referencing those describing Meghan Markle as “just another Hollywood liberal who will speak out on a few issues she cares about while ignoring the needs of the country,” Walker argued “she will face the merciless wrath of the British public” over having once tweeted “lamenting the resignation of David Cameron as Prime Minister” and declaring her “opposition to Brexit.”

     

    Bizarrely referencing how “no one wants another Royal [sic] divorce” and stating: “After all, she did not make her first marriage work,” truly negative Walker plainly illustrated his belief that this is a union that will not last. He bizarrely also concluded: “In their first television interview [Prince Harry and Miss Markle]… It felt like the two of them had been sent to remind the world that the British Royals [sic] like all black people, especially the ones they rule!” He is wrong and the world should celebrate the fact that Prince Harry is to marry Meghan Markle, a lady of conviction and stature.

     

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    Warped Walker vs. Magnificent Markle – Andre Walker and Meghan Markle – Kushner-Trump mouthpiece Andre Walker’s attack on Meghan Markle was an utter disgrace; it is time that this warped weirdo was called out for what he truly is
    Meghan Markle shared an image of a poster that read: “If EU leave me now, you take away the biggest part of me” after the Brexit referendum in Britain in July 2016

  • Exposing Traditional Britain

    Exposing Traditional Britain

    After far-right Traditional Britain Group is exposed in an ITV documentary, oddball founder and ex-jailbird Gregory Lauder-Frost responds

     

    Last night ITV screened an hour long documentary that “examined the resurgence of the far right in Britain; its expansion on and use of the Internet and social media; the internationalization of the far right with cooperation and contact between groups and individuals on a scale not seen before; the recruiting of more women and young people to different groups, and the impact that this is having on British society.”

     

    In Exposure’s Undercover – Inside Britain’s New Far Right, produced by David Henshaw, not only did several courageous journalists go undercover within far right organisations but one also managed to infiltrate a meeting of the crackpot Traditional Britain Group in Mayfair, London. At that gathering, the compere was heard to suggest that there are “10 million aliens in this country who are ‘producing children all the time’” and referenced the group’s policy of seeking “voluntary repatriation of aliens to their natural homelands.”

     

    In response, Gregory MacLennan Scholey Lauder-Frost (or ‘GLF’ to his mates) – a previous The Steeple Times ‘Moron of the Moment’, a man jailed in 1992 for theft and an individual prone to such remarks as describing Baroness Lawrence OBE, the community relations campaigner and mother of the late Stephen Lawrence, as “no friend of the English people” and “a complete nobody” – issued a statement defending the ragbag organisation he founded in 2001. In it, he branded Hope Not Hate as “far left… communists” and claimed “the TBG does not hate anyone… [but] we would prefer it if they remained at home.”

     

    Elsewhere, in a video shared on YouTube, another farcical fool named Martin Sellner – the leader of the Austrian New Right movement – referenced the Traditional Britain Group’s members as “very British characters” and “patriots.” Plainly, he’s never met the likes of Lauder-Frost and the ‘Half Biscuit’ Viscount St Davids fan Benjamin Duncan.

     

    Watch Exposure’s Undercover – Inside Britain’s New Far Right on the ITV Hub by clicking here.

     

  • Anne Marie Waters

    Anne Marie Waters

    The “Donald Trump of the UK” (without the power) according to her fans but just a “piss poor Nazi bigot” according to others, Anne Marie Waters failed to become leader of UKIP in September 2017. Born in Dublin, educated at Nottingham Trent University and a lesbian, Waters condemned her loss as “Jihadi – 1, Truth – 0” and went on to form a joke of a new party named For Britain in October 2017. A former Labour candidate also, this immigrant hater surprisingly has 65,000 followers on Twitter and repeatedly makes claims such as “Islam is evil” and: “The law will be used to silence anyone with a semi-right opinion.” She especially hates the Pope and Somali refugees. What a delight!