The Steeple Times

Tag: prosecco

  • A Wetherspoons Washout 2021

    A Wetherspoons Washout 2021

    On ‘Unlockdown Day 2021’ the Truro branch of Wetherspoons was empty; given its owner Tim Martin’s joy in banning just about everything, could anybody be surprised?

    Wetherspoons pub chain owner Tim Martin is a bore, a braggart and an on-off Boris Johnson groupie. This deservedly disliked dimwit is known for ranting in support of Brexit and not allowing European alcohol brands to be served in his venues and in January 2020, the draconian drip even “limited customers with children to just two alcoholic drinks each.” This laughable lunatic even once went as far as to put a stop to champagne on the basis of where it has to be made.

     

    Prior to these decidedly deranged decisions, 66-year-old Martin banned dogs both inside and outside his pubs (on the basis that his workers “are sick of picking up poop”) and then added social media usage to his list of things prohibited across all premises. Here is a man whom claimed to dislike the rules of the EU, but here also is one obsessed with creating ridiculous rules of his own.

     

    Yesterday, when British pubs were finally allowed to reopen after the easing of the third lockdown and patrons flocked to bars to get pissed, the public took rightful revenge on Tim Martin.

     

    Featured in an article by a trainee reporter for Cornwall Live named Edward Church, the Truro branch of the painfully picky chain, a dirty looking dump named Try Dowr, “wasn’t met with a stampede” on reopening and nor did it get “much of a fanfare.”

     

    “By 7.30am, no one had shown up,” commented Church, before adding: “A few passersby seemed tempted… [But] none of them stuck around in chilly, windy Lemon Square for their chance of a cheap pint, and they wandered off to Pannier Market and elsewhere on the square… Time passed, however, and no queue materialised.”

     

    Diddums to Tim Martin and perhaps a warning also: Nobody likes a killjoy and frankly nobody wanted to return to his funless dumps when freedom allowed. Perhaps it’s time for ‘Dim Tim’ to relax his ridiculous rules and turn his pubs back into places people might actually enjoy. Next!

     

    Pictured top: Tim Martin, a man once voted ‘PR Week’s’ “Flop of the Month,” with his on-off Brexiteering bestie Boris Johnson.

     

    A Wetherspoons Washout 2021 – No shows at Wetherspoons pubs – On ‘Unlockdown Day 2021’ the Truro branch of Wetherspoons was still empty; given its owner Tim Martin’s joy in banning just about everything, could anybody be surprised?
    A Wetherspoons Washout 2021 – The Try Dowr branch of Wetherspoons is not exactly Britain’s most beautiful boozer, but one would have thought it would have had at least a few loyal customers willing to return to celebrate reopening. Plainly, the impact of tiresome Tim Martin’s ridiculous rules proved to the contrary on ‘Unlockdown Day 2021.’
    A Wetherspoons Washout 2021 – In July 2020, just before lockdown restrictions were for the first time relaxed, the @SteepleTimes Twitter account shared this clip of “a male and a female are seen staggering up and falling down a staircase whilst, frankly, p***ed out of their skulls” and accompanied it with the caption: “Two J. D. Wetherspoons customers at 3pm tomorrow.” It went viral and was liked by nearly 500 people and shared by nearly 200 also.
    A Wetherspoons Washout 2021 – No shows at Wetherspoons pubs – On ‘Unlockdown Day 2021’ the Truro branch of Wetherspoons was still empty; given its owner Tim Martin’s joy in banning just about everything, could anybody be surprised?
    A Wetherspoons Washout 2021 – Members of the Facebook group ‘Angry People in Local Newspapers’ got somewhat worked up about the ‘Cornwall Live’ story. Some strangely actually supported Tim Martin, but the majority expressed sentiments such as: “That’s Wetherspoons for you, the locals are good judges. Actually a piece of half decent journalism from ‘Cornwall Live’ for once.”
    A Wetherspoons Washout 2021 – No shows at Wetherspoons pubs – On ‘Unlockdown Day 2021’ the Truro branch of Wetherspoons was still empty; given its owner Tim Martin’s joy in banning just about everything, could anybody be surprised?
    A Wetherspoons Washout 2021 – Another ‘APLIN’ member, Gerard Montgomery, concluded: “It would be nice to think this is people supporting local pubs and remembering how poorly ‘Spoons treated their staff,” whilst one Ian McGowan concluded: “I am waiting for ‘Hull Live’ to run a story of the first post lockdown punch-up in one of the local ‘Spoons. We should not have long to wait.”
  • Distraction Dawn

    Distraction Dawn

    Deranged dope Dawn Ward uses the ‘distraction technique’ by quitting ‘Real Housewives of Cheshire’ as she faces a trial for racism and cocaine possession

    When she’s not getting herself convicted for slapping Sinitta in “fish fueled fights” in Knightsbridge restaurants, motormouthed maniac Dawn Ward is often to be found seeking out attention on the nation’s telly boxes.

     

    Now, this morning, however, the MailOnline’s Natasha Hooper plainly fell for Mrs Ward’s PR spin and shared news that she’s leaving ITV’s Real Housewives of Cheshire programme after five years “so that she can focus on her family.” Hooper, however, terribly conveniently neglected to mention that this washed-up wench is actually awaiting trial for racism and cocaine possession in March 2022.

     

    Given this rather inconvenient “matter” cannot exactly sit well with a family orientated channel such as ITV was so clearly overlooked, it seems Dawn Ward, for once, has pulled a blinder and got the distraction technique into play. Shame on Natasha Hooper for not showing the slightest ounce of journalistic nous.

     

    Pictured top: Aside from swigging champagne and her terrible temper, Dawn Ward is most certainly not known for her sartorial elegance. Here, the creosoted creature is pictured taking to the catwalk to sport the ‘alien look.’

     

    Facebook: @TheSteepleTimes

    Instagram: @TheSteepleTimes

    Twitter: @SteepleTimes

     

    Distraction Dawn – Dawn Ward tries out the distraction technique – Dawn Ward uses the ‘distraction technique’ by quitting ‘Real Housewives of Cheshire’ as she faces a trial for racism and cocaine possession.
    Distraction Dawn – Dawn Ward with her ex-footballer husband Ashley Ward (left) and dressed up in fetish gear with what one might politely term “a gimp” (right). Here’s one classy bird. Not.
    Distraction Dawn – Dawn Ward tries out the distraction technique – Dawn Ward uses the ‘distraction technique’ by quitting ‘Real Housewives of Cheshire’ as she faces a trial for racism and cocaine possession.
    Distraction Dawn – Dawn Ward likes to turn on the tears (or wag her finger in anger) when she doesn’t get her way. The public should be reminded she already has one criminal conviction and now faces yet more serious charges as she heads back to court in March 2022.
  • Dirty Dawn Can’t Take the Heat of the Coke

    Dirty Dawn Can’t Take the Heat of the Coke

    Dirty Dawn strikes again – Attention seeker and alleged racist and coke possessor Dawn Ward proves she cannot cope with a bit of truthful press attention

    Dawn Ward was most likely a bully at school. Prone to pointing her finger and screaming like a banshee on butane, this attention seeking wench tries to fight dirty, but in reality is just a cowardly cretin.

     

    After The Steeple Times quite accurately reported on Mrs Ward – a genuine halfwit harridan whom sadly rose to the Z-list as a result of seeking out publicity through an ITV show named Real Housewives of Cheshire – being charged with racially aggravated harassment of two Jewish brothers and possession of cocaine, she not only blocked us on Twitter but also got her troll troupe on the case.

     

    In response to Twitter subsequently suggesting the removal of a link to our article, we say this: “We entirely stand by what we said about the Cheshire cat Dawn Ward and again highlight her for what she truly is: Trailer trash and the modern-day equivalent of Bet Lynch on steroids.”

     

    Ward, whose “fish fueled fight” with a bit of “napkin slapping” with the singer Sinitta landed her with a conviction for assault in June 2016, should simply realise this as she awaits her truly deserved trial in March 2022: If she can’t take the heat, she shouldn’t go near the coke and quite frankly, she ought to bloody well get out of her especially naff kitchen.

     

    Pictured top: Dawn Ward always delivers when it comes to posing for the camera.

     

    Facebook: @TheSteepleTimes

    Instagram: @TheSteepleTimes

    Twitter: @SteepleTimes

     

    Dirty Dawn Can’t Take the Heat of the Coke – Dirty Dawn Ward of Real Housewives of Cheshire – Attention seeker and alleged racist and coke possessor Dawn Ward proves she cannot cope with a bit of truthful press attention.
    Dirty Dawn Can’t Take the Heat of the Coke – Washed up wastrel Dawn Ward often looks angry, but she’d be advised to tone down her temper when she appears in court for alleged cocaine possession and racially aggravated harassment in March 2022.
    Dirty Dawn Can’t Take the Heat of the Coke – Dirty Dawn Ward of Real Housewives of Cheshire – Attention seeker and alleged racist and coke possessor Dawn Ward proves she cannot cope with a bit of truthful press attention.
    Dirty Dawn Can’t Take the Heat of the Coke – Dopey Dawn Ward has blocked on ‘The Steeple Times’ on Twitter. As Lauren Cooper in ‘The Catherine Tate Show’ would say: “Am I bovvered?”
    Dirty Dawn Can’t Take the Heat of the Coke – Dirty Dawn Ward of Real Housewives of Cheshire – Attention seeker and alleged racist and coke possessor Dawn Ward proves she cannot cope with a bit of truthful press attention.
    Dirty Dawn Can’t Take the Heat of the Coke – Creosoted creature Dawn Ward – whom has also been accused of owing £500,000 to fellow ‘Real Housewives of Cheshire’ participant Leanne Brown – may have spent a small fortune on her kitchen, but anyone sane would just throw such naff faux woodwork in a skip.
    Dirty Dawn Can’t Take the Heat of the Coke – If the plastic not fantastic wack job that is Dawn Ward had been born in a different age, she’d likely be a reincarnation of Violet Elizabeth Bott.

  • A Coked-Up Cheshire Cat

    A Coked-Up Cheshire Cat

    Notorious prosecco “gag reflexer” and Sinitta “napkin slapper” Dawn Ward resurfaces; the Cheshire cat has been charged with racial abuse and coke possession

    Just as everyone rejoiced after believing they’d heard the last of the dastardly dope that is Dawn Ward, the old trout had to go and resurface.

     

    Featured in the MailOnline this morning, the creosoted creature and supposed Real Housewives of Cheshire ‘star’ Ward appeared at the Inner London Crown Court yesterday via videolink for a pre-trial hearing where she was told she is now set to face trial in March 2022. She is charged with the racially aggravated harassment of two Jewish brothers and possession of a Class A drug, cocaine, at Euston Railway Station on 29th October 2019.

     

    Like fellow brawling bigot Marie-Claire, Baroness von Alvensleben, brassy Mrs Ward – a potty mouthed wench prone to telling anyone whom dares to put in her rightful place in the sewer to “do one” – has previous experience at Hammersmith Magistrates’ Court. She was convicted of assault after attacking the singer Sinitta Malone in a “fish fueled fight” in June 2016.

     

    Of her impending trial, a spokesman for “Bet Lynch on steroids” told The Sun:

     

    “She vehemently denies these allegations and looks forward to clearing her name in court when the full facts can be made public.”

     

    For her sake, Cheshire cat Ward would do best to avoid using the same inept legal representatives as in 2016. They failed to get her off what appeared a pretty weak charge and what she herself described as a “storm in a tea cup.”

     

    At the time, of the “napkin slapping” over talk of her husband “sleeping around” episode district judge Elizabeth Roscoe remarked: “I’m satisfied that when Mrs Ward prodded or poked Miss Malone it was an assault by beating and was unlawful, although the force was minimal, not strong. Therefore, I find the case proven.”

     

    Miaow.

     

    Pictured top: Plastic not fantastic Dawn Ward takes to pointing a finger when she doesn’t get her way; she has previously been accused of napkin slapping and now faces a trial for a bit of racism and drug possession also.

     

    Facebook: @TheSteepleTimes

    Instagram: @TheSteepleTimes

    Twitter: @SteepleTimes

     

    A Coked-Up Cheshire Cat – Dawn Ward charged with racial abuse and drugs possession – Notorious prosecco “gag reflexer” and Sinitta “napkin slapper” Dawn Ward resurfaces; the Cheshire cat has been charged with racial abuse and coke possession.
    A Coked-Up Cheshire Cat – Dawn Ward with her ex-footballer husband Ashley Ward (left) and dressed up in fetish gear with what one might politely term “a gimp” (right). Here’s one classy bird. Not.
    A Coked-Up Cheshire Cat – Dawn Ward charged with racial abuse and drugs possession – Notorious prosecco “gag reflexer” and Sinitta “napkin slapper” Dawn Ward resurfaces; the Cheshire cat has been charged with racial abuse and coke possession.
    A Coked-Up Cheshire Cat – Mrs Ward has been trying to sell her gaudily decorated Cheshire home, Warford Hall, Great Warford, near Alderley Edge, Cheshire, SK9 7TU for years. Though she reduced the price from £15 million to £12 million, there have thus far, unsurprisingly, been no takers for this vulgarian’s Victorian. Its appearances on the ‘Real Housewives of Cheshire’ did nothing to aid its sale and it was here that during an interview with the ‘Mirror’ this classy creature charmingly announced: “I don’t do Prosecco, babe, only the real stuff. I have a gag reflex if anyone tries to hand me a glass of that s***.”
    A Coked-Up Cheshire Cat – Dawn Ward charged with racial abuse and drugs possession – Notorious prosecco “gag reflexer” and Sinitta “napkin slapper” Dawn Ward resurfaces; the Cheshire cat has been charged with racial abuse and coke possession.
    A Coked-Up Cheshire Cat – Queen of fake Dawn Ward (right) with fellow ‘Real Housewives of Cheshire’ participant Leanne Brown and some astounded looking semi-nude waiters. Mrs Brown later went to “war” on Mrs Ward after claiming she owed her £500,000.
  • Tea at Blakes

    Tea at Blakes

    Matthew Steeples takes tea in the delightful courtyard garden at Blakes Hotel in South Kensington, London

     

    Blakes Hotel is synonymous with the now much overused description “boutique hotel” and is generally considered the world’s first. It opened in 1978, is a destination that is popular with the likes of Seal and Sharon Stone and was also the place The Steeple Times chose to launch exactly five years ago in June 2012.

     Tea at Blakes – Matthew Steeples takes afternoon tea in the delightful courtyard garden at Blakes Hotel in Roland Gardens, South Kensington, London, SW7 3PF.

     

    Aside from moving the restaurant of this enchanting South Kensington palace of opulence to the building’s ground floor last year, the hotel’s rear courtyard was transformed by designer Matthew Williamson in mid-2016. Featuring bright colours and such things as a prancing zebra, I recently enjoyed tea there in the summer heat with my friend Ekaterina Fields. I was charmed by not only the most attentive of staff but also the finest small-batch teas by a firm named Lalani & Co.

     

    Available for £12.75 and each paired with éclairs by Maître Choux, Blakes have curated four teas that will take you on a journey through Kyoto, Megalaya and Nepal. They range from the fruity to the chocolaty in taste and accompanied by a glass of prosecco or gin and tonic, one is left asking: “What could be better on a balmy June afternoon?”

     

    Blakes Hotel, 33 Roland Gardens, London SW7 3PF. Telephone: +44 (0) 20 7370 6701.

     

  • (Not) Wedded by Ward

    (Not) Wedded by Ward

    Loudmouth champagne swiller Dawn Ward once again fails to get permission to turn her vulgar home into a wedding venue

     

    Marketing material for Dawn Ward’s tastelessly decorated home, Warford Hall, near Alderley Edge in Cheshire, boldly describes it as “the finest entertaining house ever conceived”. She’s failed to generate any interest in it since putting it on the market for the ridiculously ambitious sum of £12 million ($15.4 million, €14.4 million or درهم56.4 million) and has now, once again, failed to get planning permission to turn the building into a conference centre and banqueting venue for boot camps, functions and weddings.

     

    Of why he scuppered Mr and Mrs Ward’s application as an “inappropriate development in the Green Belt”, planning inspector Jonathan Clarke remarked:

     

    “I have found that it has not been satisfactorily demonstrated that the proposal would operate without causing substantial harm to the living conditions of occupiers of nearby dwellings. Therefore, the very special circumstances needed to justify the development do not exist”.

     

    In May 2016, champagne loving, prosecco hating Mrs Ward spoke to the Manchester Evening News about her plans. She moaned:

     

    “Neighbours don’t like noise. I understand. It’s unbelievable. Fair enough (to complain) if you are local, but we are getting complaints as far as Tytherington. How it can affect people as far away as Tytherington I have not idea. It’s ludicrous”.

     

    Later, her husband, former footballer Ashley Ward, added:

     

    “In October 2015 I attended a meeting hosted by the Parish Council at which people were advised that ‘the only way we can stop this application is to ensure we send as many written complaints as possible and beat the number of 60 plus that we managed to raise for the previous owner’s application’”.

     

    “An organised campaign was created with letters of objection even coming from people living completely out of the area and flyers distributed giving tips on how easiest to provide a complaint”.

     

    “I am concerned about the motives for the campaigns against all Warford Hall applications and in particular that this one is prejudicing the facts of the application and the findings of the local authority experts; planning officers, environmental health and highways officers”.

     

    Bad news comes in droves for Dawn Ward, it seems. In February, it was revealed she was being taken to court by her former friend and fellow WAG Leanne Brown in the wake of her having failed to repay a loan of £500,000 ($640,000, €598,000 or درهم2.4 million) and in June 2016 she was convicted of assaulting the singer Sinitta at the now closed Belgravia restaurant Salmontini.

     

    (Not) Wedded by Ward – Dawn Ward fails to get planning consent
    Warford Hall, Merryman’s Lane Great Warford, Alderley Edge, Cheshire, SK9 7TP, United Kingdom

    (Not) Wedded by Ward – Dawn Ward fails to get planning consent
    Dawn Ward is a woman known for liking to get her own way

  • Warring Ward

    Warring Ward

    Champagne swiller Dawn Ward “at war” with one-time friend and fellow WAG and cast member of ‘The Real Housewives of Cheshire’ Leanne Brown

     

    Yesterday, The Sun on Sunday reported that a favourite of all at The Steeple Times, Dawn Ward, is “at war over a £500,000 loan”.

     

    43-year old Mrs Ward, whose attempts at interior design at her naff Cheshire mansion have left it lingering on the market at the overly ambitious price of £12 million since 2015, is said to have borrowed the cash from Leanne Brown, a fellow footballer’s wife, in 2013 and hasn’t paid it back.

     

    Dawn Ward and Leanne Brown
    Dawn Ward (right) and Leanne Brown in happier times

     

    A “source” close to 40-year old Mrs Brown and her husband, Wes, 37, told The Sun on Sunday:

     

    “Dawn asked to borrow the cash. They agreed, but with interest payable after six months”.

     

    “It seems to them she took advantage of their kindness and has no intention of giving it back”.

    “They spoke to solicitors and sent a legal letter spelling out their intention of taking her to court”.

     

    “Leanne and Dawn used to be great friends, so it is a shame things have reached this point”.

     

    “But her failure to pay back the loan has really soured their friendship, and now they feel they have no choice if they want to see their money again”.

     

    “The tension between the pair during filming is palpable. Last week tempers flared [on the set of The Real Housewives of Cheshire] again and a glass was smashed”.

     

    A spokesperson for champagne obsessed, Prosecco hating Mrs Ward, whose 2016 conviction for assault also made headlines, remarked:

     

    “We have been friends for years and have completed many business deals together and everybody is aware that money is owed on both sides. We have tried to arrange a meeting to clear this up but the offer has not been accepted”.

     

  • A knockout in Knightsbridge

    A knockout in Knightsbridge

    Knockout two course lunch and dinner offer at The Rib Room including a glass of wine for under £20 (more…)

  • Reader Offer: Join La Brasserie for prosecco

    Reader Offer: Join La Brasserie for prosecco

    La Brasserie to offer complimentary prosecco on the evening of 2nd September (more…)

  • Kate Enters: “What’s on your mantelpiece?”

    Kate Enters: “What’s on your mantelpiece?”

    The Steeple Times asks artist and curator Kate Enters: “What’s on your mantelpiece?” (more…)