Tag: reality television

Wally of the Week – Noel Edmonds

Matthew Steeples suggests Noel Edmonds’ latest outburst just confirms himself to be a strange, publicity desperate fool

Spiritualist television personality Noel Edmonds is certainly an off-the-scale oddity. He blamed the banking giant HBOS for getting cancer and then claimed he knew of an electric box that could cure the disease; he tried to “comfort” a cat on Jeremy Vine’s radio show in 2016 and he’ll also forever be associated with his financially disastrous ‘Blobby Land’ theme park in Morecambe, Lancashire.

Determined to keep himself in the public eye, Edmonds recently chose to participate in a BBC Two “endurance rally show” programme named Eight Go Rallying: The Road To Saigon. Likely paid handsomely for driving 2,500 miles through Cambodia, Thailand and Vietnam in an MGB GT with his wife, the television presenter have since complained that the experience was “a farce” and that he was even “deceived” into attending a wrap party in a brothel.

In an article for The Sunday Times, Edmonds commented:

“We were trapped in the worst kind of reality TV show, in which the reality is that the producers are deceiving the viewers.”

“After months of silence, I assumed they had come to the only sensible conclusion and had decided to drop the series. But no — out of the blue I received an email announcing the dates for broadcast. To compound the insanity, the BBC is using my name and image to promote the series.”

“No, Auntie, you’re misbehaving and I won’t be implicated.”

Seriously Noel, stop drinking the Kool Aid: We all know you are publicity desperate and we all know you planted this story simply to boost your own pathetic ego.

As the comedy character David Brent once quipped:

“You know, like poor Noel Edmonds. People going, What’s he doing going round hospitals at Christmas giving out presents? He’s doing it for himself, isn’t he? He’s not doing it for himself! He’s doing it for them. He’s not doing it at all any more. He can’t get on telly for love nor money. But when he did it, he did it for them.”

In summary Noel: Please. Please just shut up.

Pictured top: Noel Edmonds hugging his creation ‘Mr Blobby’ at the opening of Crinkley Bottom at Happy Mount Park in Morecambe, Lancashire in 1994.

Instagram: @TheSteepleTimes

Twitter: @TheSteepleTimes and @M_Steeples

August 13, 2018
Moron of the Moment – Ferne McCann

Ferne McCann shamelessly attempts to flog £12.95 lip plumping primer on Instagram just as the father of her child is jailed for an acid attack in London

Just as her former boyfriend and father of her child, Arthur Collins, was deservedly jailed for 20 years with an extended licence of 5 years for throwing acid over 22 victims in a nightclub, Ferne McCann inappropriately took to Instagram yesterday to promote a £12.95 lip plumping primer for a company named Project Lip.

McCann – a dimwit whose “glittering career” has included stints on The Only Way Is Essex and This Morning – despite being immediately criticised for her insensitivity then also shared a picture in which she posed with the equally pointless famous-for-nothing James Argent. In doing so, she piled yet more misery on those injured and scarred for life by Collins but no doubt she thought: “Hey ho, I may as well make a little dosh out of all this media attention.”

“Despicable liar” Collins – a sorry excuse for a man identified as being of “low IQ” at his sentencing – will now rightly rot for at least ten years. His actions were sick beyond belief and though Miss McCann cannot be blamed for what this scumbag thug did on 17^th April 2017 at the Mangle E8 club in Dalston, London, she should realise that distastefully promoting cheap beauty products just as Collins’ was sentenced is nothing but tremendously tasteless and utterly wrong.

#BoycottProjectLip #ShameOnFerneMcCann

Pictured above – Ferne McCann with “her love” Arthur Collins in Dubai in an identical ‘Killer Candy’ T-shirt to the one he wore whilst throwing acid over the 22 people whose life he forever altered.

Follow The Steeple Times on Twitter at @SteepleTimes.

Ferne McCann shared this post on Instagram on the very day the father of her child Arthur Collins was sentenced for an acid attack; we are sure his 22 victims would love to buy a £12.95 lip plumping primer

She also posed for an image with ‘The Only Way Is Essex’s’ James Argent

Ferne McCann with the now jailed Arthur Collins in happier times

Ferne McCann posted a picture of her child with Arthur Collins just five days ago; that child is named ‘Sunday’ and chillingly, as some have observed, the night of the week that Collins arrived at the Mangle E8 club to conduct his attack was a Sunday (the actual incident occurred at 1am on Bank Holiday Monday)

December 20, 2017
(Not) Wedded by Ward

Loudmouth champagne swiller Dawn Ward once again fails to get permission to turn her vulgar home into a wedding venue

Marketing material for Dawn Ward’s tastelessly decorated home, Warford Hall, near Alderley Edge in Cheshire, boldly describes it as “the finest entertaining house ever conceived”. She’s failed to generate any interest in it since putting it on the market for the ridiculously ambitious sum of £12 million ($15.4 million, €14.4 million or درهم56.4 million) and has now, once again, failed to get planning permission to turn the building into a conference centre and banqueting venue for boot camps, functions and weddings.

Of why he scuppered Mr and Mrs Ward’s application as an “inappropriate development in the Green Belt”, planning inspector Jonathan Clarke remarked:

“I have found that it has not been satisfactorily demonstrated that the proposal would operate without causing substantial harm to the living conditions of occupiers of nearby dwellings. Therefore, the very special circumstances needed to justify the development do not exist”.

In May 2016, champagne loving, prosecco hating Mrs Ward spoke to the Manchester Evening News about her plans. She moaned:

“Neighbours don’t like noise. I understand. It’s unbelievable. Fair enough (to complain) if you are local, but we are getting complaints as far as Tytherington. How it can affect people as far away as Tytherington I have not idea. It’s ludicrous”.

Later, her husband, former footballer Ashley Ward, added:

“In October 2015 I attended a meeting hosted by the Parish Council at which people were advised that ‘the only way we can stop this application is to ensure we send as many written complaints as possible and beat the number of 60 plus that we managed to raise for the previous owner’s application’”.

“An organised campaign was created with letters of objection even coming from people living completely out of the area and flyers distributed giving tips on how easiest to provide a complaint”.

“I am concerned about the motives for the campaigns against all Warford Hall applications and in particular that this one is prejudicing the facts of the application and the findings of the local authority experts; planning officers, environmental health and highways officers”.

Bad news comes in droves for Dawn Ward, it seems. In February, it was revealed she was being taken to court by her former friend and fellow WAG Leanne Brown in the wake of her having failed to repay a loan of £500,000 ($640,000, €598,000 or درهم2.4 million) and in June 2016 she was convicted of assaulting the singer Sinitta at the now closed Belgravia restaurant Salmontini.

Warford Hall, Merryman’s Lane Great Warford, Alderley Edge, Cheshire, SK9 7TP, United Kingdom

Dawn Ward is a woman known for liking to get her own way

April 21, 2017
What a Difference a Day Makes

Twenty-four hours ago Arthur Collins was the toast of OK! magazine; he’s now on the run and a wanted man

Twenty-four hours ago, the Mail Online gushed about Ferne McCann and Arthur Collins, a couple most of our readers will never have heard of. Now, that article is gone and instead the press are focusing on the fact that Mr Collins is on the run in the wake of a police raid on his home.

Ferne McCann and Arthur Collins in happier times

A mugshot of Arthur Collins issued by the Metropolitan Police and an image of him captured on CCTV at Mangle, the Dalston Club where he is alleged to have been involved in an acid attack

“Bad boy Arthur”, as The Sun today refer to the 25-year old scaffolder, is alleged to have been involved in an acid attack in a London club on Sunday in which sixteen people were injured. Police have issued an arrest warrant for Collins and when they visited his home, they discovered cannabis plants, cultivation equipment and illegal firearms.

OK! magazine feature an interview with the couple in their current edition. In it, Miss McCann, a “reality television star”, referenced how she and Collins were planning on moving in together and commented:

“We spend every night together anyway. Moving in is definitely the next step. And I know that seems a bit rushed, but when you know, you know”.

“Arthur is moving in the day after I get the keys! I get them on May 5^th, he’ll move in on May 6^th. So I just need 24 hours to settle in and put my stuff down”.

Such an occurrence now seems highly unlikely and here, indeed, is an example that never has the adage “what a difference a day makes” been truer.

April 19, 2017
Jog On Jenner

Caitlyn Jenner proves herself to be truly hypocritical; it is time this self-publicist were simply ignored

Caitlyn Jenner is a person with nothing else on her agenda other than keeping herself in the public eye. This transgender ‘reality star’ appeared to support Donald Trump’s election campaign in 2016, spoke at the Republican National Convention last July and attended the Liberty Ball at Donald Trump’s inauguration. She did so because she thought hanging out with the 45^th POTUS would generate headlines and boy did this linkup do just that.

The 67-year old former Olympian, now realising the swell of public opinion about Trump has turned very much for the worse, issued a video message Thursday criticising a decision to reverse President Obama’s transgender bathroom directive and termed it “a disaster”. She concluded: “Finally I have a message for President Trump, from, well, one Republican to another… You can still fix it. You made a promise to protect the LGBT community. Call me”.

Jenner – whose previous statements about politicians have included terming Hillary Clinton a “f**king liar” and stating that Trump “would be very good for women’s issues… I don’t think he’s out there to destroy women or take things away or do any of that kind of stuff” – is a hypocrite and motivated only by keeping her sorry clan’s money making machine on the road. It’d be best if she were now instead simply ignored.

February 24, 2017
Warring Ward

Champagne swiller Dawn Ward “at war” with one-time friend and fellow WAG and cast member of ‘The Real Housewives of Cheshire’ Leanne Brown

Yesterday, The Sun on Sunday reported that a favourite of all at The Steeple Times, Dawn Ward, is “at war over a £500,000 loan”.

43-year old Mrs Ward, whose attempts at interior design at her naff Cheshire mansion have left it lingering on the market at the overly ambitious price of £12 million since 2015, is said to have borrowed the cash from Leanne Brown, a fellow footballer’s wife, in 2013 and hasn’t paid it back.

Dawn Ward (right) and Leanne Brown in happier times

A “source” close to 40-year old Mrs Brown and her husband, Wes, 37, told The Sun on Sunday:

“Dawn asked to borrow the cash. They agreed, but with interest payable after six months”.

“It seems to them she took advantage of their kindness and has no intention of giving it back”.

“They spoke to solicitors and sent a legal letter spelling out their intention of taking her to court”.

“Leanne and Dawn used to be great friends, so it is a shame things have reached this point”.

“But her failure to pay back the loan has really soured their friendship, and now they feel they have no choice if they want to see their money again”.

“The tension between the pair during filming is palpable. Last week tempers flared [on the set of The Real Housewives of Cheshire] again and a glass was smashed”.

A spokesperson for champagne obsessed, Prosecco hating Mrs Ward, whose 2016 conviction for assault also made headlines, remarked:

“We have been friends for years and have completed many business deals together and everybody is aware that money is owed on both sides. We have tried to arrange a meeting to clear this up but the offer has not been accepted”.

February 13, 2017
Quote of the Week – A Moron in the White House

Donald Trump’s presidency was worryingly first predicted in July 1920

In ten days time, on 20^th January 2017, the world will watch in horror as a reality television “star” is sworn in as the 45^th President of the United States of America.

Bizarrely, this was predicted in July 1920 by H. L. Mencken, a journalist known as the ‘Sage of Baltimore’, in a column for the city’s Evening Sun newspaper. He wrote:

The larger the mob, the harder the test. In small areas, before small electorates, a first-rate man occasionally fights his way through, carrying even the mob with him by force of his personality. But when the field is nationwide, and the fight must be waged chiefly at second and third hand, and the force of personality cannot so readily make itself felt, then all the odds are on the man who is, intrinsically, the most devious and mediocre – the man who can most easily adeptly disperse the notion that his mind is a virtual vacuum.

The Presidency tends, year by year, to go to such men. As democracy is perfected, the office represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. We move toward a lofty ideal. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

Mencken plainly foresaw the Presidency of Donald Trump and he equally surmised how Twitter would play its part in his rise. America has ditched reason and its chosen deviousness and mediocrity. God help us all.

January 10, 2017
Boy George scratched

Viewers left asking how Boy George acquired facial bruising and scratches (more…)

March 21, 2016
Kylie and Kardashian

There’s only one Kylie – and it’s not a Jenner-Kardashian (more…)

March 2, 2016
Three Umbrellas

‘Million Dollar Listing’s’ Justin Fichelson lists £12.6 million Three Umbrellas, Carmel estate used by Ferrari and Pagani during the annual Pebble Beach Concours d’Elegance

Used by both Ferrari and Pagani during the famed Pebble Beach Concours d’Elegance, ‘Tres Paraguas’ – Spanish for ‘three umbrellas’ – in Jacks Peak, Carmel, California has been brought to the market by the star of Bravo TV’s Million Dollar Listing San Francisco, Justin Fichelson.

Three Umbrellas – Tres Paraguas, 566 Aguajito Road, Carmel-By-The-Sea, CA 93923, USA

Priced at £12.6 million ($17.5 million, €16 million), the 12,482 square foot house was designed by architect Ron Mann for Bob and Aime Carroll in 2004 and described by him as an “experiment, … a one of kind living environment [and] something really new and innovative”.

Formed as a complex of five structures around a large enclosed courtyard with a pool, catina and spa, Tres Paraguas is dominated by three giant roofs of corten steel and features 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms and 2 half-bathrooms.

Enjoying “sweeping views” of the Monterrey Peninsula and the Pacific Ocean beyond, the property stands on a lot that extends to a total of 4.75 acres. It is within 10 minutes of downtown Carmel and is described by Fichelson as “a spectacular modern estate”.

Three Umbrellas – The internal style is strikingly modern.

Three Umbrellas – There are both outdoor and indoor entertaining spaces

Three Umbrellas – An aerial view of the compound with the Pacific Ocean beyond illustrates the umbrellas Ron Mann envisaged in his design

For more information, email Justin Fichelson at [email protected]

Subscribe to our free once daily email newsletter here:[contact-form-7 id=”225″ title=”Contact form 1″]

February 27, 2016