A tenacious Romany Gypsy turned multi-millionaire businessman, Mayfair and Hertfordshire based Alfie Best overcame “many obstacles and prejudices” to make his fortune in cars, mobile phone stores and mobile home parks. The owner of Wyldecrest Parks also produces his own gin and claims his life philosophy is “90% perspiration and 10% inspiration”. His equally entrepreneurial son, Alfie Best III, appeared with him on Channel 4’s My Big Fat Gypsy Fortune.
Tag: social media
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Trumping Livingstone
Has Ken Livingstone become Britain’s answer to Donald Trump?
Father of five Ken Livingstone would no doubt hate the comparison but, putting him in perspective, he’s rather like a British version of the American father of five Donald Trump.
When Ken Livingstone doesn’t like what is said about him, he terms it “incredible lies”; Donald Trump, by comparison, prefers to reference such reporting: “Fake news!” Whereas Livingstone claims to have “no interest in managing [his] financial affairs”, Trump simply refuses to release details of his income. Here, in the form a reptile loving socialist and a four times bankrupt billionaire, are two bombastic politicians with not a care for books and history and here are two loudmouths who respectively suggest: “My only regret is the media’s obsession with the past” and that they believe themselves to be the “Ernest Hemmingway of 140 characters”.
Yesterday, whilst Trump decided to ridiculously try to blame President Obama for a gas attack in Syria, Livingstone – a man prone to pushing journalists over walls and accusing hedge funds donating to Labour being akin to “Jimmy Savile funding a children’s group” (in spite of taking £8,000 from a hedge fund himself) – managed to avoid being expelled from the Labour party in spite of being deemed to have brought the party into disrepute over remarks about Zionism, Hitler and anti-semitism.
That “anti-politician politician” Livingstone, like “anti-politician, real persona” Trump, has been able to get off scot-free speaks volumes. It is time such men were brought to book and it is time their ability to avoid being held accountable for their truly offensive views came to an end.
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Overheard – 31st March
Clangers overheard and snippets spotted by readers of ‘The Steeple Times’
Ferry & Yah
A PR maven at the Chiltern Firehouse loudly spoke into her mobile. She speedily told the person at the other end of the line: “Bryan Ferry is amazing. Yah. Super yah… I saw his son in 5 Hertford Street. That was a triple yah… Becks and I had such a laugh coming up in the car. That was a yah, a cheers and yah… I didn’t try and talk to Bryan Ferry’s son. That wouldn’t be a yah”. She put the phone down, quaffed her cocktail and dialled her next yah-ing victim.
Milton to Walton
At the bar of The Enterprise in Walton Street, Chelsea, a chubby woman from the Midlands summoned a waitress. She exclaimed: “I want a table now. Outside. This is war. I want one now. Who do those bloody people sat there think they are? We’ve come all the way from Milton Keynes”. Another customer mumbled: “We’d rather you go back there”.
Storming Doris
“What is it with these storms?” asked a middle-aged estate agent at the bar of the since closed restaurant La Brasserie in Brompton Road, SW3. His equally bright friend answered: “Storm Doris: I thought it was a terrorist incident”.
Blairing Blackpool
At lunch at Sexy Fish in Berkeley Square, W1, a pair of businessmen debated their worst ever mistakes. The winner? “I paid £1,500 to meet Tony Blair’s son for lunch once. What a waste. I wish I’d bought a flight to Blackpool instead”.
A Need for Pecorino
“Pecorino, I need some Pecorino”, remarked a woman with an expensive looking pram in a deli in Marylebone. An elderly gent tapped her on the shoulder and asked: “Who do you and your kid think you are? Wallace and Bloody Gromit?”
The Richness of Wholefoods
On Facebook, Matthew Cranwell posted: “When I see a rich bitch in Wholefoods, I pretend I need help and ask: ‘Excuse me, do you work here?’ Just to keep things real”.
Submit comments you hear to [email protected]. We publish amusing and ridiculous chatter we receive and sometimes we change names and locations to protect the identities of the vain and the vacuous.
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The Baloney of Brexit
Summing up Britain beginning its road to Brexit and an amusing take on the Prime Minister’s letter to Donald Tusk
Yesterday, Theresa May found her date with destiny and triggered Article 50. With no more restrictions on bendy bananas (a total myth) and the start of a long goodbye, Britain reached a “historic moment” from which there can be – as the shoe loving Prime Minister herself put it – “no turning back”.
As Sky News suggested 56% of those they polled were happy with what is about to occur, Mrs May met with her cabinet in Downing Street. Bumbling Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson was the last to arrive at the gathering and the first to leave and later the well-known CV exaggerator turned Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs Andrea Leadsom announced she was “very happy” with what had been discussed.
May was unsurprisingly subsequently heckled in Parliament when she announced: “We know we will lose influence… The world needs the liberal, democratic values of Europe” and was met with disdain from Lord Heseltine also. He commented:
“The letter represents the biggest sacrifice of British sovereignty that I can remember… All the stuff about gaining sovereignty will be exposed for the hypocrisy that it was… It is the biggest sacrifice of self-interest I know of”.
Whilst the President of the European Commission Jean-Claude Juncker remarked of the biggest victory for nationalism since the Second World War: “I’m deeply sad”, we’ll leave the final word with the President of the European Council Donald Tusk. He added: “Thank you and goodbye”.
An amusing take on Theresa May’s letter, shared widely on social media, to Donald Tusk follows:
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The Loss of La Bras
The closure of La Brasserie in Chelsea should send a signal to greedy landlords; their avarice is killing London
There are restaurants that come and go and there are ones that become institutions. La Brasserie fell into the second category but sadly, yesterday, after 45 years in business, this popular dining spot closed its doors for the very last time.
A great loss to the neighbourhood and a firm favourite of everyone from Mary Quant to Mickey Rourke, this Brompton Road restaurant and bar was considered a home-from-home by its loyal staff and rambunctious regulars. Never did one pass through its doors without encountering a plethora of familiar faces and never did one leave without having been part of something akin to an episode of Cheers.
Opened originally in 1972 and run by its charming and able proprietor Peter Godwin since 1972, the sad demise of ‘La Bras’ (as it was endearingly known) came about after a six figure rent increase resulted in continued trading being utterly unsustainable. Joining many other restaurants in the area to have departed – including Elistano on Elystan Street, Itsu on Draycott Avenue, Poissonnerie on Sloane Avenue and Toto’s on Walton Street – soaring business rates did not help either but one can certainly attribute far more blame to the not-so-charitable landlords grasping to achieve an extra buck.
In a statement, issued via Facebook on Wednesday morning, a representative for La Brasserie remarked:
Peter Godwin the proprietor of La Brasserie, announces with deep regret the closure of the restaurant after 45 years, due to insurmountable increases in overheads and operating costs.
Peter would like to thank all the wonderful hard working staff, many of whom have worked here for over 20 years and have become a real family. He would especially like to thank his right hand man for 42 years Majid Barka, he says he could not have done it without him. He would also like to thank the fabulous management team, Suzie Cooke, Ross Armitage, Cesar Salinas, Carlos Marques, Elodie Bourges, Juan Lousada and Anna Milescu . Also the fantastic team Jose Dantes, Angelo Saavedra, Teodosio Candeias, Manuel Nascimento, Juan Carlos Moreno, Maria Hernandez, Anca Stroia, Edyta Grzesik, Ferran Rodriques, Alessandro Mazziotto, Alhaji Kanu, Anastasios Andreadis, Carlos Teotonio, Hasmik Gevorgyan, Iveta Sudova, Karla Pestana de Barros, Manon Fouquet, Marion Vialle and Monica Cassiano. Last but definitely not least our amazing kitchen team, Head Chef Jamie Smith, Christian Cheregi, Antonio Filipe, Jose Marquez (Pepe), Alexandro Fratini, Desmond Cowan, Jason Whiskey, Jonathan Lincango, Kwacu Owusu, Leopaldo Alvarado, Nanis Dimitrakis, Salar Samyani, Silviu Manole and Stephan Mendes.
It’s a huge disappointment that we had to close, but we have exhausted all possible options to remain in operation. Thank you for all your support, we have enjoyed 45 years of trading and serving you, our customers. As you well know, you have become our friends and extended family. We hope you and your family have enjoyed it as much as we have and we wish you all the best for your future.
Please forgive us and remember the good times!
Peter and all the team at La Brasserie.
Of this sad development, Matthew Steeples, editor of The Steeple Times, commented:
“Chelsea’s character is being torn from its soul by greedy commercial property owners wanting to replace long established businesses with chain stores and luxury goods brands as they believe they’ll pay higher rents”.
“Given the number of empty shops and restaurants peppering the locality, however, the strategy of landlords is plainly not working. These charlatans are killing the area and all that will soon be left is a near empty money park”.
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Nelson & Nintendo
Georgian mansion, where Admiral Lord Nelson lived with his lover and her husband, for sale for £4.25 million; it was renovated by a former Nintendo executive
One would expect a senior executive of a tech company to live in a slick, modern home in Silicon Valley, but since 2004, Matthew Hill, for many years a senior manager at Nintendo, has called a Grade II listed manor house named Fir Hill in Hampshire’s Meon Valley home.
Built in 1765 and the scene of one of the most famous ménages à trois in history when home to Sir William Hamilton, his wife Emma and Admiral Horatio, 1st Viscount Nelson in 1801 to 1802, the 7,905 square foot “Georgian masterpiece” includes 3 reception rooms, 7 bedrooms and 4 bathrooms. It stands in 5.2 acres of land and comes with a two-storey stable block with potential for secondary accommodation.
Mr Hill purchased the property from Mrs Vida Schreiber, previously Lady Clive, after the death of her husband, Brigadier Schreiber. He met intellectual property lawyer Georgy Evans in 2007 and married her in St Mary and All Saints church in Droxford in 2012 and in the time since, aside from completing the renovation of Fir Hill, the couple have worked together creating a website that comprehensively details the entire history of the building.
Of the renovation and why they are now selling, Matthew Hill told Hampshire Life:
“The renovation work took us 10 years on and off. Our architect said, you either have a big bang and not live here for two years or work in phases. We decided to do the work in four phases which meant we could live here, moving around the house as each phase was completed. The experience of living in the house helped with the restoration… It’s a lovely house, with a lovely feeling, but too big for the two of us now”.
Fir Hill is for sale for £4.25 million ($5.17 million, €4.87 million or درهم19.07 million) through Christie’s Real Estate.
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Singleminded Sturgeon
As Nicola Sturgeon lobs a grenade at Theresa May’s “red, white and blue Brexit”, Jeremy Corbyn is met with equal derision
Yesterday, Nicola Sturgeon pulled a blinder and threw a spanner in Theresa May’s plan to announce a “red, white and blue Brexit” with immediate effect.
Undoubtedly the reason hapless Mrs May didn’t proceed to trigger Article 50 on Monday, Sturgeon’s actions left even Conservative hardliners questioning the merits of the unknown road Britain is currently on. They, of course, care for the Union more than anything else and that it is again at risk is most worrying indeed.
On Tuesday morning, Tory MP Anna Soubry told SKY News:
“I would say to Theresa May: Don’t turn your back on the Single Market. It would solve the problem in Scotland and Northern Ireland if we stayed in the Single Market”.
Elsewhere, Labour lightweight Jeremy Corbyn took to Twitter to ask the public to “join [him] in Parliament Square and help defend the rights of EU citizens who have made a life here”. He was understandably met with utter derision and amongst the 618 comments in response were such remarks as:
“Piss off Jeremy, you whipped your MPs into letting the UK get into this state. Stick your pointless rally up your arse”.
“You do know you’re allowed inside Parliament, right? You actually have a nice platform in there where you can push for change”.
“You’re the leader of a political party, not a protest movement. There’s a crucial vote in the Lords today, and soon in the Commons. Focus on that, not pick-nicking in the square”.
“An oven glove on a stick would be a more effective opposition leader than you”.
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Website of the Week – Overheard and Seen in Whitstable
Facebook page where Whitstable locals spend time moaning and arguing will have you in hysterics; welcome to an example of a modern day spouting place for ‘Busybody Britain’
You’ll likely have come across the Facebook page ‘Overheard in Waitrose’. It has garnered over 500,000 likes since its inception in April 2014, but, for those wanting to see something a little more off-the-wall, we urge readers to attempt to join the closed group ‘Overheard and Seen in Whitstable’.
If approved by the somewhat Kafkaesque page admins – a controlling trio named Helen Crook, Leo Osborn and Simon Poole – one gets not only usual community related issues such as stories of missing-presumed-stolen mobility scooters (lots of these contraptions can be found causing havoc on the pavements of Whitstable) but also angry incomers ranting about planning decisions, moaning mothers lamenting the limited opening hours of McDonald’s and shoppers saluting local stores for the quality of their mushroom displays.
From the bizarre to the ridiculous, ‘Overheard and Seen in Whitstable’ will certainly leave you laughing. A selection of strange posts, pictures and requests follows:
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Rent-a-Gob v. Rent-a-Gob
Acid tongued food blogger Jack Monroe’s libel victory over right wing media personality Katie Hopkins represents a victory for only their lawyers
Katie Hopkins undoubtedly spouts a lot of hot air but that she lost a libel action yesterday brought by the acid tongued food blogger Jack “I don’t want my boobs anymore” Monroe is a little beyond a joke. Both women like the sound of their own voices more than anything else and both profit from controversy, but that Hopkins is now left facing a total bill estimated at around £325,000 seems a little ridiculous given that all she did was write two undoubtedly inappropriate but subsequently retracted tweets.
Monroe – whose claims in documents submitted to the court that she tends “to move in circles of cookery and politics rather than outrage and vitriol” will have those who’ve encountered this nasty piece of work in fits of hysterics – won £24,000 after Mr Justice Warby agreed that Hopkins’ actions had left poor, little her with “injured feelings” that “remain raw”.
In the judgment, Mr Justice remarked:
“Publication [of the tweets] not only caused Ms Monroe real and substantial distress, but also harm to her reputation which was serious, albeit not ‘very serious’ or ‘grave’”.
“In this case, the allegations were serious but certainly not towards the top end of the scale. The extent of publication was significant but not massive in its scale. The harm to reputation, though serious, will not have been grave. The need for vindication is not a weighty factor, as there has been no attempt to prove the truth of what was alleged. This judgment will make the position clear to those who were unaware of it already. Ms Monroe is a public figure, in the sense that she chooses to engage in public life and to engage in political discourse in public forums”.
In spite of the judge rejecting suggestions that any real harm was done to Monroe, she’s actually benefited hugely from this case. Not only does a woman who once claimed David Cameron “used stories about his dead son” to sell off chunks of the NHS “to his friends” walk away with a large chunk of change in damages, but this foul mouthed, ‘gender X’ harpy has also had her profile splashed across virtually every paper today. She will now profit handsomely from interviews and features and no doubt will find herself taking on new work elsewhere. In the case of Rent-a-Gob vs. Rent-a-Gob in summary though, there’s actually only one real winner: Their lawyers.
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Picture of the Week – Spying on Trump
As an image of Barrack Obama spying on Donald Trump in Trump Tower goes viral, we call on America to section the lunatic president
On Sunday, Florida based Michael Hussey, editor of the Pushing Rope blog, shared an amusing image of Donald Trump in his ghastly, over gilded Trump Tower apartment on Instagram. Outside the window –Photoshopped into the picture – is Barrack Obama suckered to the building and peering in with a pair of binoculars.
Though what Mr Hussey shares will certainly amuse many, Trump’s unsubstantiated claims on Twitter about being wiretapped are anything but. Here, again, all we see is evidence of a lunatic in charge of the asylum and now, one can only hope, the powers that will be will finally act: It is time for Donald Trump to be sectioned.