Kimi Räikkönen

This talented Finnish Formula One champion is not known for being the most forthcoming interviewee but is the fifth highest paid sportsman in the world with an estimated salary of around £31 million per year. When asked: “How does it feel to drive at 300 km/h?”, Räikkönen responded: “It feels normal”. Of what makes him angry, he told a reporter: “If you keep asking questions like those”. Asked why he didn’t bother to watch a ceremony where Michael Schumacher received a lifetime achievement award on live TV, Räikkönen commented: “I was having a shit”. He believes “Formula One would be a paradise without the media”.

The Roll Call - CHARACTERS

1

Steve Cotten (AKA ‘Britain’s Grumpiest Landlord’)

2

Mrs Filthy Piece of Toerag

3

Angela Millington (1981 – 2014)

4

The Cheery Street Sweeper

5

Katherine Knight

6

Brenda from Bristol

7

The Cross Word Couple (AKA ‘The Crossword Couple’)

8

The Pret Prayer

9

The Pret Sleeper

10

Prince John Zylinski

11

The Pret Spitter

12

Marina Gibson

13

Margaret Wooliscroft

14

Angelo Vizcaino

15

Mr Penny Farthing

16

Adolfo Orsi, Jr.

17

Helen Brach (AKA “The Candy Lady”, 1911 – 1977, body never found)

18

Mikel Ruffinelli

19

Ziyanda Palesa Tutu

20

Kensington Claus

21

The Knightsbridge rose seller

22

Sam Malin and Irène Major (AKA “Lord and Lady Hailes”)

23

Paul and Selena Bailey

24

John Bly

25

Joyce Cohen (formerly Joyce McDillon, née Joyce Lemay)

26

Malavath Poorna

27

Linda Sandler

28

Pablo Salcedo

29

Pedro López (AKA “The Monster of the Andes”)

30

June and Leon Bernicoff

31

Leah Chase (AKA “The Queen of Creole Cuisine”)

32

Dominic and Stephanie Parker (AKA “The Posh Couple”)

33

Sarah Meakin

34

Julia Bradbury

35

Raine Spencer; Raine, Countess Spencer (AKA “Acid Raine”)

36

Hannah Campbell (AKA “The Bionic Woman”)

37

Candida Lycett Green (1942 – 2014; nicknamed “Wibz”)

38

The musical tramp

39

Doris Thompson MBE OBE (1903 – 2004) and Geoffrey Thompson (1936 – 2004)

40

Charity Charity

41

Kimi Räikkönen

42

Elisabetta and Francesca Grillo

43

Kester Thomas (1975 – 2013)

44

Gavin Rankin

45

Marina Oswald Porter (born Marina Nikolayevna Prusakova, Russian: Марина Николаевна Прусакова)

46

Elena Salvoni (1920 – 2016)

47

Sultan Kösen

48

Boaty Boatwright (also known as Boaty Boatwright Baker)

49

Cedric Robinson MBE

50

Oliver Newton

51

Don who's Donna at night

52

Captain Pugwash (AKA ‘Captain’ Michael M. Maricic)

53

Peter Grace OBE (1938 – 2013)

54

Jim Bowen (born Peter Williams)

55

Derek Bell MBE

56

Pamela Jennings (better known as “Soho Pam”, 1964 - 2013)

57

£50 grifter

58

Parrot Man

59

Jocelyn Wildenstein (née Périsset and also known as “Jocelynnys Dayannnys da Silva Bezerra”)

60

John Gaze (1947 - 2011)

61

Charlie Richardson (1934 – 2012)

62

Count Robin de la Lanne-Mirrlees (1925 – 2012)

63

Christian Gerhartsreiter (main alias Clark Rockefeller)

64

The Rt. Hon. Baroness Shackleton of Belgravia LVO (Fiona Shackleton)

65

Sir Peter O'Sullevan CBE (1918 – 2015)

66

Nancy Wake AC GM (1912 – 2011)

67

Claus Von Bülow

68

Alexander Fiske-Harrison

69

Lord Lucan (also known as Richard John Bingham, 7th Earl of Lucan)

70

Umberto Scomparin

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