Bathtub Bonkers

As a poll in ‘The Sun’ reveals 89% of participants do not want to see alleged bathtub shagger Prince Andrew return to public duty, his batshit bonkers ex-wife makes what she calls ‘bathtub teddies’

Whilst ‘Randy Andy’s’ live-in ex-wife is well known for having her toes sucked by her lovers, this week she turned to making bizarre jokes as she waved frankfurters around in a somewhat sexual fashion on her Storytime with Fergie and Friends YouTube channel.


Plainly ignoring public outrage about the Duke of York’s alleged non-sweaty bathtub antics in Ghislaine Maxwell’s Kinnerton Street, Belgravia home with Virginia Giuffre, ‘Fergie’ also decided to make what she termed some ‘bathtub teddies.’ Whilst it turned out that this simpleton was actually just playing with cupcakes (as you do), it is just clear that this wack job just doesn’t get the severity of what the Pizza Express lover stands accused.


Elsewhere in The Sun on Sunday this morning, just as a poll has suggested the vast majority of the public do not wish to see Prince Andrew return to public duties, it seems the ‘Prince of Darkness’ has been making “secret night visits to the Queen as he plots [a] public return.” Quite frankly, he’d be better doing something else instead: Get back in his tub and scrub himself into obscurity.


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Sarah Ferguson was photographed having her toes sucked by her then lover John Bryan at a villa in the South of France in 1992.
Matthew Steeples
A graduate of the London School of Economics, Matthew Steeples is a writer and marketing consultant. He conceived The Steeple Times as a media arena to fill the void between the Mail Online, The Huffington Post and such organs as the New York Social Diary in 2012.


  1. They both need putting in a bathtub. A bathtub of acid. Dissolve them. They have brought enough stench to our otherwise lovely royal family.

  2. Do not send that bloody woman Fergie Down Under again!!!! We have had enough trouble with her and her sister in the past!!!!!!! She needs to be put over someone’s knee ——- but not mine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. She really just doesn’t get it, not only is she ignoring Randy Andy’s bathtub antics, she is denying any of his other perverted jaunts, and calling his victims liars. This stupid cow lives in cloud cookoo land, what with her stupid You Tube channel and unfunny bizarre jokes, she needs to take a look in the mirror. Andy is accused of very serious offences, but she thinks it will all just blow over if he keeps his head down. Well he needs to tell her to keep her head down, and stop causing attention to herself, and him. The problem with her is, she has never had to do an honest day’s work in her life, and she thinks everything just grows on trees for her to pick. If the Duke had any sense, he would have dumped her lazy fat arse years ago. As for him taking up any royal duties in the future, tell him he’s dreaming.


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